She lied to me, i know she had previous relation but it was not physical with that guy (our society is very conservative), and she told me she had relation but i asked her weather they talked on phone or not and she said NO, but I am damn sure they talked coz i asked her 2 best friends they told me they have talked on phone, and my brother saw this girl with that boy talking in english center, which was long ago. she accepts the relation with him but denies tat she talked to him. Its not important weather she talked to him or not its not sin its very normal for me but its important why she lied to me? that hurts me alot. and i told her nothing will happen if she tells me the truth even, even its very bitter. she loves me alot thats for sure but Lie i cant tolerate. I lover her so much too. i dont know i am lost and very hurt now.
what to do???
2007-12-30 16:54:58 · 13 answers · asked by freeman 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Show her how important honesty is by being honest with her. Tell her that you know she spoke with him on the phone. Ask her why she feels the need to be dishonest about it. Stress the importance of honesty in a relationship. Do this lovingly, not as a confrontation. But don't be a doormat for future incidents either. Let her know that the truth in your relationship, whether good or bad, is the only way your relationship will work. Honesty is always the best policy. It sometimes hurts. But in the end - - it's the best choice. I wish you luck.
2007-12-30 17:43:18 · answer #1 · answered by Pinky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When we love someone specially if we plan to marry we should trust and give respect on what she says. In your case I don't think she is lying to you, the reason why she could not accept what you alledgely accusing her is because there is nothing to accept. Maybe she explained to you already about that guy but you don't want to believe her because what you want her to do is to accept what she did not do.
If you really do love her, you should believe her and respect what she say. If ever you have some doubts about her, just don't tell her or anyone else, do some action and move and try to find the truth. If you found that she is not sincere and honest about your relationship, then don't marry her.
2007-12-31 01:08:46 · answer #2 · answered by EDRO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its probably the fault of your very conservative culture. Its quite likely she was scared to tell the whole truth for fear of being punished, or being thought of as a sinner. You sound as angry as you do paranoid. You should calm down and have a peaceful conversation with her where you can tell her your frustrations and give her a chance to tell her whole side of the story without making he be afraid. If you love each other, you will find a way to respect each other and put her past behind you.
2007-12-31 01:23:54 · answer #3 · answered by slo_gin007 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Relax.
You need to start to trusting her now or this will never work. Stop the jealousy bit now. So what if she talked to this ex of hers or not. She may say she did not because she is affraid of what you may do.
Just be up front with her how you feel and hope she feels the same and go on with life. I hope for the best for you. But just relax and be the person she feel in love with.
You will be better off.
2007-12-31 01:01:44 · answer #4 · answered by Big Deal Maker 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dear friend, please allow me to write what i really want to.
You are STUPID!!! I am really sorry to say that but there was nothing better I could write.
Well, you love her and she alos loves you a lot. The best thing you can do is ... forget the past (please read it as FORGET THE PAST) and start a new life. NEVER (I mean NEVER) expect that she MUST tell everything about her previous relations. IT WILL HURT HER and YOU, of course. I think, even if she lied, she did a good job. It's never advisable to talk about pre-marital affairs with your life-partner. Please avoid talking about it.
2007-12-31 01:04:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Even if she talked to him, it doesn't mean anything. It sounds like she was scared you would become jealous or assume that she was cheating on you, even though she isn't, so maybe she thought it would be better to just say she didn't to avoid that. You and your girlfriend should be together becuase you make each other happy, not becuase you "own" her...just trust her and respect her. If you don't, you may drive her away, which would be a complete waste.
2007-12-31 01:22:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with more than you are really STUPID and IMMATURE! She seems to be a matured lady who did not get into nitty gritties of the past realtionship its useless to know why you failed in science in class 2. You have to move ahead in life.
Another thing relationship is based on pillars of faith, love and trust. If you dont have it. Grow up first!
2007-12-31 01:25:12 · answer #7 · answered by neff 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She might be hiding it
for a reason..
But then again,
you can't always rush to conclusions.
See whats up before you skip to conclusions.
But don't ignore the situation and just blow it off.
That doesn't mean you start spying on her either.
Tell her that you know she's lying about it.
If you're absolutely positive about it.
2007-12-31 01:01:35 · answer #8 · answered by Joanna =] 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is going into the marriage lying I wouldn't stay with her; what kind relationship will that be in the long run?
2007-12-31 01:08:30 · answer #9 · answered by Juanita T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
confront her and stand strong. tell her its ok to tell the truth and that (apparently) ur a sensitive guy. worst case scenario- no wedding bells.
2007-12-31 01:01:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋