Most of you answered alot of my prev. questions but I have another. A friend of mine made me feel bad about wanting another wedding. The thing is this , My hubby & I got married in july , and it was only 5 ppl who attended. We got married quickly because 2weeks after we married he was being deployed to Iraq. He promised that we would have the whole 9 when he came back. Well a friend of mine says that since we were already married that we shouldnt get married again. But we feel that we should share this with our family and friends. The only 5 ppl there , were our 2 kids , our mothers and the officiant, so really there was NO wedding , we just got married. I am 26yrs old and its every girls dream to walk down the isle but due to military I had to rush it a bit . Do you think its wrong we want a reception ? We plan to renew our vows & I will wear a dress and then a reception.
2007-12-30 16:49:41 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Yes it was our plans to have a nice big wedding with our families , he is in special forces so he can leave at any given time and sometimes there is no notice , we were able to find out when so thats why we rushed and did it but planned to have it once he returned home. But the big wedding was in the plans way before deployment. We were actually in the middle of planning it .
2007-12-31 19:19:33 · update #1
I'm not putting down the 1st wedding at all , it was perfect for us . I'll cherish it forever but our families were not there and we want to share that with them . Weddings are all about families coming together. This wont be a wedding per say, we will renew our vows & have a small reception , no church involved or anything. And the gifts dont matter to us either , we didnt get gifts the 1st time and we could careless if we got some for the 2nd .
2007-12-31 19:23:26 · update #2
NO it's not wrong! Have the wedding! This is really not your friend girl!!! This is a personal choice and everyone has a chance at having their dream wedding! The why's or why not's don't matter to anyone! Plan your wedding and invite all your family and friends! Those who go will be the ones who love you and those who don't...they don't matter! A wedding is a beautiful day to share your love, joy and happiness with your family and true genuine friends! Start planning and may you have the wedding you always dreamed off.....remember the sky is the limit! Do the whole 9 yards....dress, ceremony, reception and everything you always dreamed your wedding would be! Have fun planning and may God bless you in all you plan and do....may he send good friends your way!!!
2007-12-30 21:06:14 · answer #1 · answered by itzybit_303 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be great to have a second wedding with family and friends. But honestly you shouldn't put down your first wedding because it was rushed. I mean as I have always been taught if the wedding is too big and lavish it won't last long. So its best to appreciate the fact that at least your mothers were there and your kids. Because I'm sure that no doubt if you invited very many people now they probably wouldn't come as they figured you are already married and why do it again unless you two want gifts or something now. So its always best to cherish the fact that you got to share the wedding with the people that birthed you in the world and and whom you had birthed into the world as well. Best to leave some things just that special.
2007-12-31 01:20:22 · answer #2 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't let people make you feel bad. Maybe they just think you are trying to get gifts or something... which in that case you could just clearly state that their presence will be the only gift you want!
Also, the fact that you call it a vow renewal... I mean, people should understand that you just want to share your joy with your loved ones since you didn't get a real wedding the first time.
Then again, you could just do a reception. I had a cousin who got married in Washington D.C. with just the parents present, then came home and had a regular wedding reception the next weekend... wore her wedding dress, had bridesmaids and groomsmen dressed up and all.
2007-12-31 01:02:36 · answer #3 · answered by *ae* 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you go strictly by etiquette you shouldn't have a second "wedding" However I do understand (as do many who hold themselves to strict etiquette standards) that military deployments often change things.
If you were going to have the BWW (big white wedding) before he deployed but were unable to due to the deployment by all means go ahead. If you had no desire to have the BWW till after you were already married and having regrets then you shouldn't. (I don't think those that eloped should come back and decide to walk down the isle and have a big party just so they can be the center of attention after the fact.)
It does sound like you wanted it all along and were just unable to have it before he got deployed and had no choice but to move the wedding up and simplify so that you could be married while he was over seas. I say have it enjoy just make sure people know it's a vow renewal and not your actual legal marriage date.
2007-12-31 00:58:28 · answer #4 · answered by grinningcomb 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Given the circumstances at the time I don't think you are doing anything wrong in wanting to have proper wedding.
Had you had a big wedding and were planning another, that's a different kettle of fish.
Perhaps when you do the invitations don't call it a wedding so much as a renewal of vows and thanks for his safe return ceremony that you want to share with all of your favourite people.
2007-12-31 01:16:08 · answer #5 · answered by Julie R 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
DO IT and don't let anyone else's opinion concern you! You should have told the 'friend' that your hubby and others like him have afforded her the right to have an opinion and you shouldn't have to miss out on the wedding of your dreams because we was off protecting her rights!
Regardless of the situation, if the ones you wanted to share the day with weren't present when you married there is nothing wrong with doing it again to share it with them. If people already sent gifts after hearing you married then I suggest putting 'no gifts please' in the invites.
Do what you want and ignore the friends resistance. Best wishes!
2007-12-31 01:59:44 · answer #6 · answered by MISS H 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think its a great idea to have a 2nd wedding and reception. Renewing vows is wonderful and to have a big celebration with your family and friends makes perfect sense.
2007-12-31 02:41:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel bad, hun.
I think you should. Every girl wants to someday walk down the aisle even though you are married it would be a good chance to renew your vows and have fun. Your Husband is back and its time to celebrate that.
2007-12-31 00:59:55 · answer #8 · answered by ScarletBloodDoll 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it's never wrong to renew your vows!
where is the law that says you can't have your dream wedding?
go for it!
2007-12-31 02:54:54 · answer #9 · answered by nickname 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not wrong, but it's not a wedding - it's more of a "vow renewal" - you are already married. So no showers & no big bridesmaids parties & gift registry. Just "tone it down" a bit. You can still have a lovely vow renewal and wear a lovely gown and have a lovely reception - that's okay. Just don't go over-board like a first-time bride.
2007-12-31 17:18:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋