and now he's dumped me?

Question

so of course i like him more than ever.
hes a really great guy, but i odnt want to just be friends with him.

he 'doesnt think we're right' but 'really cares about me'
ITS REALLY CONFUSING! make up your mind, you know!

so i was thinking of explaining this in person when we get back to school. because i have to see him every day... and it hurts quite bad. i was thinking about going up to him and kissing him... but maybe im just going insane.

am i? do i give up? i dont want him not in my life...
comments, miracle solutions, smacking me via internet?
bring it, please.

Answer 1

It sounds like to me that if you want him in your life for the time being you will have to except him as just your friend. You need to be his friend before you can be more to him anyway. That is what love is built on. It will not hurt to be a friend and go out with others and see what your feelings are about each other a few mos. down the road. Try to be yourself and follow your feeling as to what your behavior should be. Men are lookng for certain standards in a woman as we look for them in a man. Stay pleasant, neat and clean and use only polite clean talk. If he comes back to you then he was yours to begain with . If not he wasn't meant to be. Look else where for your future.

Answer 2

You're not going insane.

It's possible to really care about someone that's not right for a romantic relationship - I'm currently in the same position with the woman I was recently dating (and I'm pushing 38, so there's no miracle answer - at least not that I'm aware of).
Best thing is probably to give him some space (though I know it will be difficult) and see what happens. Though you have to see him at school it will be hard, but if you don't hang out with him he might realize that he misses you more than he thought he would - it's not like you'll be "out of sight out of mind." It will take time to get comfortable with the new roles as "just friends" and be warned that time does not heal all wounds - I have some more than 20 years old that are still not fully healed.

Answer 3

What he said mean " He respects and care for u as a friend ONLY.... and he doesnt think u guys should be together as lovers" ...... its so obvious already..... he likes u as a friend , NO MORE THAN THAT !!!

You can't force someone to like/love u just becuz u like them more than ever..... love should be from both side.... if he is not ready or not wanna be with u as his gf, u should just treat him like good friend that's all

Forget about coming up and kissing him,,,, that just makes it worse.... U will make urself look cheap and pathetic, and he will be scared of u..... thats how u end ur friendship too......

And last but not least, he can still be in ur life, AS A FRIEND ...... love can go any time but friendship stays forever .....Trust me

Hope u get over him and find a good match soon!

Answer 4

I think that the guy cares about you, like a FRIEND, but isn't ready to be your BOYfriend. He obviously doesn't want to get very involved with you. I think that you can stay friends, but no more, no less. Unless you really love him, confess that you dont understand what he means. He will probably explain and he won't be offended. It's him that is more offending you then you offending him. If it doesn't work out, I'm sorry, but that's what I would do.

Answer 5

Not confusing at all....he doesn't think you're right as a couple, meaning, he does not want to date you, and the really cares about you part is being polite but cutting you off, it's a standard line for guys when they want out of a relationship.
Also you want to examine the "now he's dumped me so now I want him more than ever" line....in other words, you need some self respect and self esteem.

Answer 6

i can relate to that 1) Dont give up. 2) you should give him time to think. 3) Dont write letters to him , cause the last time i did that i got my heart broken and the week after i started darting his best friend. yeah i know but i like bolth of them at the same time. 4) Do what you feel is right to your heart and kiss him. 5) If it ends up were you guys cant be together still be really good friends .thats what i did.

Answer 7

no dont just go up to him and kiss him! take him aside and try talking to him, tell him that your confused and worried and that you dont wanna loose him. and ask him whats the problem? another girl? he needs space? ask him. and if he breaks ur heart im sorry , walk away and act like your a much better person than him as much as it hurts , then try going out having fun, keep ur mind distracted so you wont think as much about him

Answer 8

If I just broke up with you and you walked up to me and tried to kiss me, I would think that you were pathetic and sick. Chin up, ignore the boy. You have more self respect. Don't waste one sweet breath saying ANYTHING to him. In fact, don't even look at him. If he says hello, say "hello". If he asks how you are, say "fabulous" and act like you mean it. If you show him that you're weak and hurt, it will do nothing but pump his ego. If he tries to corner you and tell you how sorry he is that he hurt you, say "actually, I think us staying friends is a BRILLIANT idea. I can't see how this would possibly work". Trust me, he'll be eating out of your palm.

Answer 9

This is completely normal for a breakup. I felt that way with all of my breakups. Just give it some time. Dont kiss him it will make things alot worse. Sooner or later you too will be fine and you'll realize your better off.

Answer 10

Guys who are insecure generally behave this way. I feel that he likes the idea of having you liking him without having to over commit on his end. I know it sucks for you right now but you need to leave him alone at least for a couple of weeks. Try to immerse yourself into other activites. Good luck. GPM