Aged 27, does life get better?

Question

Hi

I live alone which can be a struggle and lonely some times, I split up with long term financee a couple of years back. Since then I had small relationships which have ended up in heart ache, guess I know how to pick em lol.

My confidence is very low and I am feeling very low, bit lonely also I guess espeically at weekends. I recently started seeing this women its now a couple of months in, and found out on xmas eve she done the dirty on me.

Does anyone else have a rough few years like this, does it get better and all work out for the best in the end? I feel like giving up, sick of going to work coming home to empty house and getting hurt in relationships.

I hate being by myself and on my own.

Answer 1

just stay away from the light

Answer 2

Dude, I know exactly what you mean. If you think that's hard imagine being with a girl for 5 years and then breaking up to find out the next week she's with another man. Everyone has their share of bad relationships, and everyone's life gets a bit tough at times. Life will get better and what you need to do is believe in yourself. Don't start dating a girl unless you know her really well and when you do, put your heart into it and give it another shot. What's the point in breaking up? My cousin is 29 and he's never been on a date and his life his lonely but he has his moments where he's so happy. In his case it's videogames, and what you need to do is find something you find interesting. Do you have any idea how many relationships end after marriage due to money? This could be a good time for you to start saving up. I had the worst childhood, and it lasted years and years and I went through pain and I never thought I would grow out of it. I'm 18 now and people tell me I haven't experienced life but I have experienced enough heartache to know how cruel this world can be sometimes. I met a girl and fell in love with her so fast and she's changed my life. You'll find a girl and she will do the same to you so just wait. When you get married, you won't have a financial problem because you were thinking ahead and were saving up. You should try exercising. When I was depressed earlier in my life I turned to working out and the endorphin boost helped keep me from depression. It made me feel better about myself and I wasn't afraid to meet new women. Try exercising and keep focused. Take a long time to know a girl and when you do it'll be worth it. So what if you have feelings for a year but can't date her? If she's the one, she'll be with you for your entire life so one year can wait because you have to make sure you've found the right person. Good luck to you and I wish you the best. Don't give up!

Answer 3

Hello Andy, I feel the same I'm 43 and life has dealt me a mean hand in life. I too live alone after loosing my only child (son) to cancer and I too have the same thoughts about coming home to no one and cooking for just one. But I keep hoping that one day God will shine down on me and send me someone in life that I can share what ever time I have left and trust me I don't see that any time in my future, but I will continue on in this here life and hope that the next life will be better, Some say this is just a test, and I will be soooo happy when he stat (God ) testing someone else, Smile your not alone, and for that woman who did the dirty on you she is not the one just keep your head up and do what I do go to the malls and being around others just helps, and family also, or get the guys over and enjoy sports or hanging out, There are things that you can do to make it alright for now go to the movies and just get a friend, just have friends to take up that space and a cat is good or dog which ever you like,Stay positive and life will get better your still younger and things can turn around for you quickly, unlike me as the days past, I pray and wish for the best. I hope you will start hanging out and get some cool guy and girls to hang out with. Sometimes are bettr than not at all. Good luck this is just a test.

Answer 4

I think life only gets better if you want it too! things happen in life,bad things, but youhave to be able to move on and do the best you can do. I dont know why some people go through life with not many problems or let downs and others get it ten fold! Ive had a rough few years also-different circumstances than you but it still sucks- I feel like giving up too sometimes, but I try to look at the good in my life and it takes some of the pain away, I guess maybe you have to learn to love yourself and enjoy your own company- the right person will come along, you cant blame yourself for your badcomings-but you can blame yourself for feeling crappy! get out there and do something you really enjoy and be with people you really enjoy, I cant promise you life will get better- but i can promise you life is what YOU make of it, not anyone else, Do me a favor and go out and whip it up! You deserve it Keep your head up high and dont let anyone bring you down! Happy new year and the best of luck! 2007 sucked hopefully 2008 will be great! ( I humor myself alot- as they say laughter is the best medicine)

Answer 5

It does get bettter. Or atleast it can. I suggest you pick up your spirits and boost your self confidence by taking some time out of the dating game and focusing on bettering yourself. Start working out and eating right, and maybe try to take some time to figure out why your relationships have not worked out in the past. It couldn't have been all your fault; but remember, some of it must have been. Also, maybe ask yourself, where are you meeting women. I'll tell you from experience, anybody you meet in a bar is not going to end up being marriage or LTR material. That VERY RARELY happens. Maybe get involved in a church if you aren't already. I am not preaching at you but God/Jesus can answer many of the questions you are asking, and only He can help you heal your heartache. You might also try to hang out with good positive friends too. I have been where you are, sort of, except I was there with a small child. I turned reflection inward and decided my outer prison was one I had created. I had alienated all the people who really cared about me and shut them out. I had hurt the only guy who ever loved the real me (which was the father of my daughter.) We are now married, have been for almost two years (been together going on 7). We even had another baby. I figured out that what I was looking for, wasn't really out there, I had had it all along. I am just lucky he forgave and took me back. You will find yourself, but try some of these suggestions.

Answer 6

Life doesn't get better, you get better at dealing with it. Maybe you need a vacation or maybe it's time for a change in your life, either way going on the way you are now you're not going to feel any better. Time to pick yourself up by the bootstraps and figure out what you want from life and see how you can make it happen. It'll give you something to focus on instead of thinking how horrible it all is and what a raw deal you've gotten in the last few years. The question is what did you learn from the rough times and how can you use it to make the rest of your life better.

Answer 7

From about 26 to 31, I felt the same way as you. I had no real relationships, my friends were all already married or dating. I spent alot of time alone and depressed. But it did get alot better. I finally met my husband at 31, and we were married year and a half later. It will get better. Find some hobbies and try to hook up with some old friends. I read alot of books and rented alot of movies. I am the person to prove it gets better. Now I have a dog, husband, lots of friends, good job and big house to keep me busy. Sometimes when I think about how lonely I used to be, it still makes me sad. As with everything, this too will pass for you.

Answer 8

I know life is hard right now and everyone feels real bad and lonely cause they get hurt in relationships but the best thing to remember is to have fun. I mean even if you haven't got a girlfriend you can always go around and make friends and have fun with friends, spend more time with friends and have fun that way you might meet someone you will be able to have a good relationship with.

Never let an individual make you feel down, even if it is hard.

Answer 9

Sorry to hear about your sadness & loneliness.
All you can do is try to change what you can to get some different results.
You can ask someone on a date, but that action doesn't guarantee that you and that person will hit it off, but you still gotta take that chance and do the asking.
I'd suggest also that you ask your friends to do more 'friends' stuff, like going to sporting events or films or whatever you enjoy. Being with friends can take the edge off your loneliness. As far as your house goes, try to make it as 'homey' and comfortable as possible so you don't dread going home.
Use your phone while at home and call at least one friend per day to get connected.
Stay fit too.
Here are some good ideas:
1. Do something that gets your heart rate up a bit like, walking, running, biking, and swimming.
2. Eat Whole, Organic foods like: Broccoli, Cabbage, Organic Brown Rice, Beans, Spinach, Sweet Potato, Apples, and other fruits and vegetables in their Natural State.
3. Avoid eating corn, white bread, white rice, white potatoes, candy, sodas, chips, and anything else that you already know you shouldn’t be eating.
4. Drink clean water as your beverage of choice. Avoid Fruit drinks and fruit juices (unless YOU juice them yourself)
5. Stop smoking, drinking beer & wine, and drinking coffee.
6. Get 8 hours of sleep each night.
7. Hang out with people who want to be healthy.
8. Avoid anything with High Fructose Corn Syrup.
9. Look into taking a multi-vitamin.

Tone up the muscles:

1. Join a gym and get a trainer.
2. If you’re short on cash, start a light stretching & yoga regimen.
3. Do push-ups, and light dumbbell curls for the upper body.
4. As I said above, walk, run, swim, and or bike
5. Take an aerobics class, a yoga class, or some other fitness class.
6. Join the local YMCA.
7. Buy or borrow this book by Bill Pearl called GETTING STRONGER.
In the book, he describes everything you need for a great fitness plan.
8. Crunches & Curl ups for the abs.


Mental Health:

1. Get a friend to talk to each day about your feelings.
2. If you have some money or insurance, get a counselor to talk to.
3. Learn how to meditate.
4. Join a support group for the issue you’re dealing with.
5. Ask your Higher Self (or God) for guidance.
6. Start keeping a diary or journal about your feelings & thoughts.
7. Write a ‘gratitude’ list every night.
8. Do something that makes you happy each day like: listen to your favorite music, draw, paint, write, or anything creative.
9. Do something for someone else who needs help.
10. If the above suggestions don't improve your mental health, talk with your therapist about the possibility of taking some medication.
11. Check out the book FEELING GOOD by David Burns.

Take care of yourself

Yam King

Answer 10

I'm 26, married and am still hoping life gets better. Don't get me wrong I love my husband, but I feel like I'm just waiting for things to start happening. Everyone i have asked, says that they remember their 30's being much better then their 20's. I hope that's true. Maybe it's just this age. I'm sure i don't feel exactly as you do, since we are different people, but even though I'm married I still feel very much alone. Maybe try to get into some social activities. Join a gym or a church or take a class. That will give you something to do after work and then you'll meet people. Hope I helped, and I hope you start feeling better. :-)

Answer 11

Yes, life does get better, but one has to work towards it. Nothing happens on it's own. I read a sign one day on my way home, it said "People are lonely because they build walls and not bridges". We all fell off the bike a few times, get back on and try again. I didn't find the love of my life till I was 39, had 1 failed marriage and finally hit rock bottom. I hope it doesn't take you that long, but I hope you will find happiness.