My boyfriend of 6 months did not buy me a birthday present. My birthday is 3 days after christmas and it also fell on the day that he had to move. He gave me a christmas present and offered to take me out for my birthday (I couldn't-had other plans). Anyways, I saw him the day after my birthday and I didn't get anything. I understand that moving has been financially difficult for him, and I'm not greedy...I just wanted a card or maybe a balloon :( Am I being unresonable, I don't want to say anything to him and make him feel bad because I think it is financial difficulties that prevented him from getting me anything. But my feelings are hurt.....
2007-12-30 04:12:33 · 16 answers · asked by Heeheheehee 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I only asked me to go to dinner the day of my birthday and I had already made plans because I assumed that he would be busy! It's not like I put other people ahead of him....he could have asked me a day or two in advance!
2007-12-30 05:34:42 · update #1
I understand how your feelings were hurt, and he should have given you at least a card. You can get them for 59 cents, for darn sake! So even if he is having financial difficulties, it sounds like you realize that. A card is not asking to much at all.
It was nice that he offered to take you to dinner, and its too bad that you had to decline. Maybe you can ask him if you can take him up on the birthday dinner he offered and set a date? See how he responds, because maybe he really had too much going on and forgot. I know its hurful to think about that! This will kindly remind him, without busting his balls. It will also make it known to him that he didnt get you anything!! You are not greedy - its completely normal to want your boyfriend to think of you on your BDAY!! Hang in there girl, im sure he has a reasonable explanation. Guys are not as good at those things as us women are!
2007-12-30 04:23:07 · answer #1 · answered by Sara S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An iPod touch is a lot of money and is a very big present. I would only suggest something like that for a relationship that has been going on for a while. Has he been talking about something he likes, wants or needs? Are there "little" things that you know he will love? For example: I was with this guy for one month and it was his birthday. He had gotten into a fight with this friend and tore his favorite shirt, which was a Pink Floyd shirt. He loved that shirt so much, so I bought him a new one for this birthday. I also got some this giant bag of skittles, because they are his favorite candy. Neither the shirt nor the skitters were expensive, but they were his most favorite presents out of all of them (and his parents had gotten him an XBox 360 for that birthday!). When it comes to guys, it's the thoughtful gift that counts. If he really, really wants a iPod touch and you can afford it, then go get it. But if there is something else that he'll favor, try getting that instead. :-)
2016-04-02 02:12:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would wait and see what happens. It's possible he's planning on making it up to you at a later date when he has more money. There was a lot going on in his life around your birthday...he was moving, it was Christmas time, and finances are probably a concern for him right now. Take comfort in the fact that he didn't forget your birthday entirely since he did offer to take you out. If it's a financial problem, the situation is probably somewhat embarrassing for him too. He doesn't want to admit he couldn't afford to get you a birthday gift.
Even if he doesn't end up doing anything for your birthday later or giving you an explanation why he didn't give you a gift, if he's otherwise a great guy, let it go. Consider your Christmas present from him to be a combination birthday/Christmas present.
For example, my boyfriend buys me nice Christmas gifts, but I don't let him buy me birthday gifts. He takes me out all the time anyway, and usually takes me to dinner for my birthday too. I would just rather spend time with him than have the gifts...and we could eat dinner at home and I'd be just as happy! :)
2007-12-30 04:33:44 · answer #3 · answered by Nonny0928 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are still learning about eachother. This is a matter of communication. In his mind the dinner offer may have covered the whole deal. Each person has different thoughts.
It is great that you see his situation. When you talk with him, this is a good place to open (it shows your consideration). Also, this B-day is over, to bring it up as a point of focus will most likely foster defenceiveness (because there is no way to fix it) so it will go better if you talk about your Next B-day. "On my next B-day I would like if you gave a card. I know you offered me dinner, and I could not go, and I am thinkful for that. B-days are special to me, and what really makes me feel good is something being done for me on that day."
How can he know this about you unless you tell him?
Thank you for asking such a good question and being so considerate of him and of your relationship.
2007-12-30 04:29:44 · answer #4 · answered by Ogou 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He offered, you did not accept. Your feelings should not be hurt. If the Move is leaving him fianacially strapped. Be understanding. maybe you should cook a meal and invite him over to celebrate it with you. If you cant afford to grill out steaks that's OK. Do something less expensive Do something with spagethetti or a tofu dish if you like. Just make sure it is a recipe you have used before with success. You can celebrate with Sloppy joes or Tacos or chili, just as easily. And if you tell him it is to celebrate, Maybe he will surprise you with a rose or a bottle of wine. Or If he ask what he can bring, let him pick a desert. He sounds fine to me. Many people do not celebrate BD's. Get over it and move on with the relationship.Make sure it is something he likes, take into consideration if he has any food the offends him that you do not fix that. Does he like Rice? Is He Vegan? what spices does he like? etc. It is your time to shine now. Remember to smile. Good luck.
2007-12-30 04:37:09 · answer #5 · answered by littlerascal711 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is ok that your feelings are hurt, but understand that he may have felt just as bad and not been able to do anything about it. Even though it may be a bit hard, and you're feeling bitter about things, try to be the good gf this time and let it go. He obviously didn't forget, and was stuck in a sticky situation. He prolly could've gotten you a card or something, but as long as he's been a good bf the last 6 months, you should just let this one go. Hope things work out!
2007-12-30 04:21:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He might have been hurt that you had more important plans on your birthday,other than going out to dinner with him.You might apologize that he wasn't included,and then ask if that's why you didn't get a card.If you don't say anything,you'll think all sorts of wrong thoughts.I think the key is to be tactful,not accusing.
2007-12-30 04:27:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already turned down your birthday present. He offered to take you to dinner and you refused. Now you are going to whine that he didn't buy your greedy self anything? Grow up. You had your chance for a nice dinner as a present and you refused it.
2007-12-30 04:17:08 · answer #8 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
WHAT IS IT WITH AMERICA!!! all about material posessions isn't his love enough for you? yes i received stuff from my boyfriend on my birthday and on christmas and we are long distance he's in ny and i'm in nc because of a move....i was the one that moved he never expects me to send him anything even though i really want to and he promised he wouldn't send me anything but he did....yes i appreciate it but i could definitely live without it i'm just thankful for everything he has done for me and always being there for me you need to understand his situation and not expect gifts and money all the time it's not important the most important things in life are not things!
2007-12-30 04:17:58 · answer #9 · answered by XxYourDeadlyPassionxX 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he was busy moving.
He offered to take you out, and you could have scheduled another time.
It does sound a little unreasonable and you can't say that you're not greedy in this situation.
2007-12-30 04:20:47 · answer #10 · answered by kecr101 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋