My sister just got engaged and is moving several states away in 3 weeks. I want to plan a bridal shower for her in her hometown or co-ed shower for them both but they can't haul a lot of gifts back to where they are moving. Can I plan a shower and request money or gift cards only for them instead of gifts that would take up too much room for travel? Also, if I do something like this would they open these at the shower like normal gifts or should we just play games and mingle? Any ideas would be great!
2007-12-30 02:53:00 · 10 answers · asked by Crox Trader 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Yes, I wondered myself if this was tacky. I just want to do something for her but not add to their stress of moving.
2007-12-30 03:42:28 · update #1
That is nice that you're considering throwing her a shower.
Maybe do an engagement party instead, that way people are not expected to bring gifts. There will always be the wedding for them to show their love with gifts. Also, remember if you are planning a bridal shower, guests bring gifts personal to the bride. Please be very clear with guests if you are going to do a Jack & Jill (co-ed) so that they won't be showing up with bags of kinky lingerie intended to excite the bride and groom in private. Typically a shower is not thrown by relatives, per rules of etiquette, because you shouldn't give the appearance of wanting to solicit gifts, but if showing your appreciation for your sister is on your heart this way, I say throw the etiquette out of the window--but NOT completely.
2007-12-30 04:11:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
A bahchelorette party and a bridal shower are totally separate events, they aren't the same thing and not the same type of event: Bridal shower: Gift giving event Bachelorette party: Not a gift giving event If you call it a bachelorette party guests would not be expected to bring a gift since a bachelorette party is not a gift giving event. Any party you host if you ask guests to pay is tacky. If a bachelorette party is at a neutral place (like a bar, restaurant, etc) guest are expected to pay their own expenses. However if its hosted in someones home then the hosts of it are expected to cover the food & beverage costs. The simple thing is, if you cannot afford to host a bridal shower and nobody will pitch in to help, then she doesn't have a bridal shower. Bridal showers aren't mandatory. You don't just have to go in with bridesmaids, while its considered tacky for an immediate family member (mom, sister) to host a bridal shower I've been to many that have been and didn't see an issue with it. You can ask her mom, sister or even her fiances family if you are on friendly terms with them.
2016-04-02 02:03:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would plan a shower for just women. I find those go over best and are more traditional for giving gifts. However, you can't in good etiquette ask for money or gift cards. It's just not proper.
I would have the couple registry at a store that found nationwide. Perhaps, Bed, Bath and Beyond or Linens and Things.
As a the host/hostess, it would be a nice gesture to take all the items to post office and ship them (it can be done) for their convenience.
To start the planning, first get a guest list. Ask the bride of any family members she would like to have attend. Ask the mothers to also get a list together.
Once, you know how many people. Figure out how much you can afford to spend on the party. If you have a traditional shower, you can do a brunch or light lunch menu. You dont' need liquor for that time of the day either. Or, you can do wine on the table.
For games, just google online. There are so many. You need to figure out the personality of the guest you are inviting and then get games that fit them.
2007-12-30 03:03:08 · answer #3 · answered by J'adore 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ask your bride to register for gift cards at their favorite stores and be sure the same stores are available where they are moving. Include with the invitation a suggestion for the gift cards. I hosted a shower with similar circumstances. I also suggested everyone bring a $1-$2 item for the kitchen, either a gadget, spice, towel, something small and a receIpe. I put the gifts in a basket and or storage tote ready for travel. The bride was delighted with the gift cards and all the gadgets, especially the spices with receipes. It was also fun guessing what the "gadget" was used for. I ran out the next day and picked up a couple of the gadgets, never knew there was such a thing to make my kitchen duties easier. You could do something similar for any room actually. Bathroom, patio, etc.
2007-12-30 04:05:53 · answer #4 · answered by onehoneybear 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that most guests would be understanding.
I would include an extra note with the invitation that explained that they are moving and don't have a lot of room then challenge guests to bring a gift card wraped in a way that you can't tell from the wrap job.
The couple still gets a surprise and the best wrap job could get a prize or something.
2007-12-30 03:49:33 · answer #5 · answered by Shay Z 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
im not quite sure what to tell you because I think if she opened her gifts at the shower it might be kind of boring for both her and everyone that came (if all she got was money and gift cards) I also don't know if this is considered tacky due to circumstances. Is she flying back to hometown and then back to her new residence?
2007-12-30 03:00:34 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Most registries allow for shipping- you could always request that guests have their gifts shipped to the new address, and bring a photo of the gift that they sent, for the couple to open in front of everyone.
2007-12-30 04:10:20 · answer #7 · answered by sarah jane 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, three weeks IMO is too short of a time to plan a shower.
You could wait until they are moved, then have a bridal shower.
That is, if she's coming back to the area.
2007-12-31 03:32:15 · answer #8 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it's very rude to make that request. It would be up to her to have the gifts shipped. (a small price to pay....really, after people are so generous to give gifts...)
2007-12-31 00:04:05 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The above answer is good!
2007-12-30 05:03:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋