you see i'm muslim and i go to a private school.i can't be myself around him.i want to act,sing,dance.my mom is christian and i love her with all my heart.he thinks singing is dead end no security.but my happiest moments are when i sing.i want to tell him i want to go to a performing arts high school.and i told him but he said 'so u don't want to learn ur religion'.i already know my religion and the education is so low in12th grade they're taking wuthering heights by emily bronte.i'm reading that now and i'm in 8th grade.i have an IQ of 125.5 that's high for my age.all i want to do is be myself and i can't and the only way i can is to sing.i'm at lost for words.
2007-12-30 01:36:40 · 9 answers · asked by songbird12 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You're just going to have to make a deal with your dad: Maintain your grades and your religious studies and in return you should be allowed to participate in extracurricular activities that involve your interests. You're still in 8th grade and you still need your education. Now is not the time to push that aside for a career in entertainment. Now is the time to feed both the interest and the necessity, while you are young and you have the energy. Trust me, when you get older you can narrow your focus.
2007-12-30 01:41:57 · answer #1 · answered by DeFreeze 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, when your parents are unsupportive of you career ambitions, there's not a whole lot you can do. It's a sad reality, but a significant percentage of kids grow up in households that are unsupportive... so at least take comfort in the fact that you are not alone.
It's terribly frustrating when you see others, some of whom clearly have less talent than you, nevertheless succeed because their parents supported them and their dreams 1000%.
But you really can't blame the parents completely. A lot of them just don't know any better. They are trying to raise you the best way they know how. They probably didn't have very supportive parents either, and they have their own ideas on how they can help you to succeed in life. If you think about it, your dad really does love you, because he wants you to have a successful future. The only thing is, his idea of success is different than your own.
So you have 2 choices. Either just bear with it for now and wait until you are 18, and then you still have an entire lifetime ahead of you to pursue your interests. Or figure out a way to reach a compromise.
If you decide to wait, you can bide your time by seriously studying and planning for it. Find a voice coach and take weekly lessons. Study your craft. Today we are so blessed with easy access to expert information. Even if you had to go to a school of his choice, you could still find the time to study singing on the side. You don't really need to go to a performing arts school. There will be plenty of outlets for you to sing, from local theater to choral groups to semi-pro bands.
The second option is compromise. Perhaps there is a way to meet him halfway. Write your own beautiful songs with Islam as the subject. Islamic countries are filled with music, beautiful songs that describe historical events of Islam or offering of praise. Think about Christian rock, for example. It's how kids who wanted to rock hard with heavy metal figured out a way to do so without offending their religious parents. It's a compromise, one that's been incredibly successful.
Above all, realize that many kids share your frustration. But you have an entire lifetime to fund and encourage your own dreams. Never forget that.
2007-12-30 09:52:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe do a little research first. Go to your school guidance counsellor and tell them what you want to do. They can suggest the best schools and give you some information to approach your parents with. You can also research what kind of careers you can go on to with this kind of training and what the average person in that field makes. As a compromise you could volunteer to take some once a week islamic classes.
2007-12-30 09:44:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well what you can do is approach you father with respec , not attitude . you need to tell him the singing is a passion of yours . and ask him this " have you ever heard of micracles? " then tell him that you could do both . you have a very high IQ for your age and you need to prove that you can stand up with that IQ . Tell him you NEED to sing . it is your life . but before all of this , rethink . you dont want to go somewhere that isnt worth going towards in the end . you need tim , time is the teller .
No Worries
-Savanna
2007-12-30 09:44:10 · answer #4 · answered by Savannabanana. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are dependent on your father you don't have alot of choices. Muslim women don't seem to have alot of choices either. However he married a Christian so maybe he is different. I wouldn't take my life in my hands, but certainly talking to a counselor at school with him might help. Sorry, you are living a religion that treats women worse than animals, there isn't alot of hope for you doing what you want.
2007-12-30 10:03:51 · answer #5 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
As a dad I want to say listen to your father, but I also think of something I tell my daughter. I tell her to learn to listen to her heart for the right answers. However, fighting with your father will get you nothing. In his own way he probably loves you and only wants what is best for you (as he sees it). You ask a very tough question.
2007-12-30 09:46:11 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont mean to be an expert, but I do believe that what you want to do is against your muslim religion.
You really need to find a compromise with your parents. You need to talk to them and put it back on their shoulders, before they got married they must have discussed what they were going to do with children and religion. And you need to tell your father that marrying a non muslim was also against his religion and he still followed his heart and you need to follow yours too.
Your parents already went against the norm, and I think it does look good for you to be able to follow your heart, just approach them the right way.
2007-12-30 09:45:20 · answer #7 · answered by sammy3256 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you are a person in you own right tell your father its not all about what he wants it about you finding yourself and doing what you want life is to short to not follow your dreams
2007-12-30 11:40:39 · answer #8 · answered by mcw 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very difficult hand you were dealt, mimi. You might just have to endure it until you can get out. There is something seriously wrong with your father. Does he think the devil invented beautiful music? My god. I just can't figure out the joyless, hopeless, meaningless lives of muslims.
2007-12-30 09:44:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋