" Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"
"It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world everyday always just exactly fits the newspaper."
"If it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark."
"Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf."
"An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing."
"Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do?Turn out the lights! "
"The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things."
"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
"Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else."
"Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference."
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVRYONE!Hug♥
2007-12-29 20:35:57 · 20 answers · asked by Schumi 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Hey man, nice ones
here are some more:
"Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately, it kills all of its students"
"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings"
"The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on"
"Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped"
"Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway."
"There are no stupid questions, just stupid people"
"Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for"
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read"
"I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it" - George Burns
"Coffee isn't my cup of tea"
"I don't care what is written about me as long as it isn't true" - Katherine Hepburn
Happy New Year everyone!
2007-12-29 22:25:00 · answer #1 · answered by Berethor 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
And a Happy New Year to you as well....always in the mood for a good laugh.....thanks.
2007-12-30 16:56:34 · answer #2 · answered by Yinzer Power 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Very good Schumi
Happy New Year to you as well
Im glad we became friends this year!
2007-12-30 05:07:00 · answer #3 · answered by staymay 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL. Great Post, and the same to You, Schumi.
2007-12-31 00:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by jfmm 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hehehe - This is funny and true - Happy new year to you and yours too
2007-12-30 05:38:17 · answer #5 · answered by Pd 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol funny
happy new year to you too
2007-12-30 05:15:44 · answer #6 · answered by young_widow_in_black 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good 1
Happy New Year to u!!!
2007-12-30 05:13:36 · answer #7 · answered by stevenyeo86 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol Happy new year Schumi.
2007-12-30 04:51:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
very funny
Happy New Year
2007-12-30 06:59:20 · answer #9 · answered by Gemma M 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
very funny quotes. Star for you.
2007-12-30 04:46:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋