I have known the person that i am dating for about and year and some, and we have been dating on and off for 4 months ( =[ ) But Her aunt (whom she lives with) Says she can't date, so everything we do is always low key so basically i can only call at certain times (rarely) and when we go somewhere friends have to go as well. And i was fine with it and so was she. But then before the christmas break (i am in high school) we made plans to hang out and do things together but we couldn't do it since she could not stay with her friend/cousin again , but instead her aunt. so over the break, we have not been able to see each other or even communicate with each other! So i thought to myself it is always going to be like this and i think i made a mistake. So my real question is, do i stay with her and possibly wait to see if things get better. Or do call it off with her? please answer
also ( if i do break up with her, is it wrong or right to go after a friend of hers???)
2007-12-29 14:22:54 · 10 answers · asked by TheReallyCoolGuy09 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Ya well it is just so weird not being able to even talk to her. but thank you all for the advice
(and i will not go for her friend)
2007-12-29 14:36:26 · update #1
If you really care about her you should express your feelings and see if she feels the same. Communication is the key to any relationship. It is hard waiting for someone when it feels like you will never be together but if you do wait its only b/c she is worth waiting for other wise your wasting both of your time. As for her friend that will only cause drama. Not only will she hate you it will end her friendship with the other girl.
2007-12-29 14:29:55 · answer #1 · answered by austin_mssu 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well this is a real problem. Her aunt is keeping the two of you from being a couple. The one person that can solve this problem the right way is you. I can give you some advice to help you do this though. You must think if you absolutely love this girl. If the very first thought in your head is no, then you know that you must break up with her because you can't say that you absolutely love her. It is wrong to go out with a person knowing inside of you that you really don't want to. Don't live this lie. If you can say that you absolutely love this girl, then wait for her. After she is 18, she is allowed to make her own decisions. She will be able to go out with people then. This is totally up to you about how you feel about this girl. Do you love her enough to wait for her a few years and not feel the urge to go out with someone else during this time. Just listen to what you brain tells you to do and then listen to what your heart says do. Choose the best choice for you. Don't worry about feelings getting hurt. They will heal with time. Good Luck! I hope I at least helped you out a little!
2007-12-29 22:34:42 · answer #2 · answered by Lauren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're feeling really brave, you could go and introduce yourself to her aunt and ask her permission to date. Very old fashioned, of course, but that's the only thing I can think of that might win her over. How long do you wait for things to improve? Well, how long can you wait? And how long will it be a problem?
To break it off with her for something that is beyond her control will be hard enough for her to deal with. To then go after her friend, well, technically it's ok, but no one is going to look favourably at you for it. If that person is her friend, she'll reject you for being heartless towards her friend (your current.)
2007-12-29 22:29:24 · answer #3 · answered by Rosie_0801 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OMG i had the same stupid problem!!
But it wasnt an aunt it was more like a MOM!
but yea you guys still kiss and get really close right??
Well me and my ex we broke up because of this.
but yea i guess right now you have to give her room until everything clears. She loves you! its just hard for her to this.
her aunt is a little BEEPPPPP!!
lol..but yea if she really loves she will ignore every thing else and she will just care about you! but if she is a good little girl then she will listen to her aunt mostly. because right now you guys are loosing communication and that kind of bad. Breaking up with her is a good thing right now but you need to explain everything really clearly so she wont be confused..
Its wrong to go out with one her friends i know your tired of the keep it on the down low thing but if you love her you wont go out with anyone...
but if you do that and you still like and you see guys hitting on her it might piss you off.......just still keeep intouch with her and this will make your relation ship stronger.,,
dont make the same mistake i did!
2007-12-29 22:32:35 · answer #4 · answered by Mac 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
no, if you really love her, you can wait.
if she really loves you she won't be afraid of you calling, you 2 need 2 arrange soething like if you call, just say u r a friend.
don't call it off just because of that. i have been in that situation only once, and the guy broke up with me...it hurts when a guy does that...don't break her heart if you really love her and especially if she really loves you.
and also, it's not right to go after her friend RIGHT after a break up, maybe after a time length, but not right after.
but it'ds our choice......but also.......don't let her tell you when to call and when not to call, because if she really loves you, she won't care, and you 2 can make a little white lie, for the sake of your relationship
2008-01-01 19:10:41 · answer #5 · answered by guitarbabe123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
woa...
i have the same problem...
my BF doesnt mind me not going places wid. him
hes went to his grandparents since the break started
And we only talked on Christmas.
I wont B/U with him cause we dont see eachother during the break.
And plus im in HS too and we do things @@ school.
And i guess its OK and yeah...
Well it might be a different situation
i guess for you
hope that helped
2007-12-29 22:28:41 · answer #6 · answered by dea.lynn 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
PERSERVERANCE .
Any one can give up on the hard stuff .
Plenty of easy stuff to have .
Reckon you have to ask yourself , am I a man or just a boy ?
Maybe the Aunt just saw a boy .
Tough this perserverance thing huh ? If She is the one you want , then you must endure .
2007-12-29 22:34:15 · answer #7 · answered by bigfred1954 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is definately wrong to go out with one of her friends... I think your probably not too serious about her anyway, if u'r thinking of asking out her friend. Do her a favor,and stay away from her
2007-12-29 22:29:07 · answer #8 · answered by penelope 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yea its not worth it...too many complications....theres plenty of women in this world that are a lot easier...go for the friend
2007-12-29 22:28:00 · answer #9 · answered by kinsact 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Ditch the b**ch and make the switch.
2007-12-29 22:27:11 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋