has any one else noticed that manners are a thing of the past?

Question

children call adults by there 1st name, no one says thank you or your welcome,when you ask a child a question 9 time out of 10 you will get a smart mouth answer,children cussing adluts, adults cussing all the time,dont parents teach manners any more or don't they teach them in school?

i was raised in a military family we were taught respect at home and in school my daughters were also taught to respect adults now some children do have very good manners but sadly they are in the minority.....i have also found that the parents of the children who dont show respect also dont show respect, i have had them explain that why should their children respect people who are not of their class and breeding......I didn't believe my ears.....

Answer 1

Not my children. We teach manners in our home. We do not allow cussing because we do not cuss. teachers should not have to teach manners that is the parents responsibility.

Answer 2

I think it has more to do with the changes in the neighborhoods. People are moving to the once nicer areas either from another country or from a bad neighborhood. So the culture of the areas are changing. Yes it is harder to keep kids on track when they are around kids who are a bad influence. However even in the poor areas I still run into kids who are well mannered. I think as our population increases you will see more of this stuff, but it does not mean the percentage is any less. I think the bad just sticks out more.

Now the manors that others are talking about such as taking off their hat in someones house and calling their friends parents sir and ma'am are becoming a thing of the past because many people feel that those things are old fashion. So I do not think a child is necessarily rude if they do not do those things. I only correct other peoples children if they are clearly being rude or disrespectful.

Answer 3

I think I'm older than most of the posters here. This question comes up with every generation. Everyone seems to think that the generation younger than them is ruder than they ever were.

It's hard to remember what you were like as a child. Also, social customs were different, and your family growing up may not have had enough money to go out at much. I think it's a combination of seeing children in public places more, and forgetting what it was like back then for ourselves.

I think there is more selfishness today, so many adults are impatient with anything that interferes with what they want when they want it. This makes them impatient about kids, pets, other people's allergies, etc. etc.

Children aren't born with manners. Manners take years to learn.

Answer 4

Seems that way. When I was at school visitors were "gods" to be revered (well almost) but last couple of years into schools as a technician, moving equipment and it feels like I had to go around th ekids . . . (well they wanted me to) Oddly enough the trolley with 4 printers on it hurt their little toes . . .

Problem are multiple, kids have no REASON to respect teachers / police / parents as Govts take away parental rights to discipline, and remove the ability for police to use relavant "action"

I say LET the police clip a mouthy teenager around the back of the head (hand slap only though) any reaction is assaulting a police officer and arrestable of course.
ALLOW teachers the belt again, in relevant cases.

I have all these "available" as puncishments when I grew up, and I know I never talked back to a teacher . . .

Answer 5

I teach my children manners- please, thank you, yes sir, yes ma'am and so on. Then once my oldest started elementary school- the cussing, smart mouth answers, and all of that began. Some of his friends were calling me a "$lut" when he was in FIRST grade, because I am 21 (look like I'm 12- it's horrible) and a single mom. He learned NOT to talk like his peers though very quickly, but due to the other children and their parents it has been hard to keep my son on the right track. Got to love the public school system.

Answer 6

My kids say yes/no ma'am (or sir), and they do say thank you (about 95% of the time). When they forget, all it takes is a reminder from me to remember their manners.

This isn't a way to make them feel inferior because they are younger, it's to teach them respect for their elders, and everyone else.

I wish MORE parents taught their kids manners...some of the stuff I've seen out in public just makes me cringe. Parents spend too much time trying to be "friends" with their kids, and not enough time being "parents".

Answer 7

Actually, yes I have noticed and I am apalled. My sister says that the reason is so many young parents, but I am a soon to be mother and it annoys me when parents try to teach their barely speaking toddler a badword so that he/she can repeat it and everyone laughs. I also notice that kids talk back to their parents and this was never the case when I was a child. We had respect for our mom and a little fear of our dad, who never laid a hand on us, but he had such a deep voice that he would make us cry when he yelled. If people read this, please teach your child about respect and manners.

Answer 8

I agree, a lot of children have no manners anymore. I have taught my children to use please, thank you, excuse me etc. They have never cussed, even when they were repeating everything that was said, they know its wrong, and when I slip and say something I get a Mommy we are not suppose to say that. As for calling adults by the first name, we always put ms. or mr. in front of their first name.

Answer 9

monkey see monkey do....kids grow up to be as polite or impolite as their parents, and when the adults have no manners anymore the kids cant be expected to. and when a child is allowed to talk to their parents like a dog they sure arent going to care to do it to any other adult. too many people spend too little time with their kids or think they need to be their best friend..thats a load of crap kids have friends they need a parent.they need discipline and they need to be taught right from wrong,and they dont need to learn this at school, they should already know it by the time they get there.
if my 9 year old acted the way i see alot of these kids acting in town or at the sore shed not be sitting down for a while and shed never see half her toys and things again. luckily she was taught better as we went along just as my son will be(hes only 5 weeks now)it drives me crazy to watch these kids and parents out in public ive wanted to pick up so many mothers and shake the snot out of them its not funny.

Answer 10

I agree. In my point of view this is coming from school where kids are taught, "Do whatever you want as long as no-one else gets hurt." How is a child to judge when somoen else will be hurt by their actions. The schools are not teaching any solid behavioral standard like they did just 20 years ago.

Answer 11

maybe it depends where you are? i have never once heard a child cursing (and i've been around a lot of kids ... the worst I've heard from my own kids is "stinky" and we dealt with that very fast!), and rarely heard an adult doing it. my kids and their friends all seem very good with the thank yous and pleases. i was just remarking to my husband how amazing it is that virtually every kid we have over by themselves (without reminders) comes over and thanks me for having them, and that our neighbor who practically lives at our house (he's here playing virtually all the time) still stands forlornly outside the door every time he comes over until a grownup invites him in (even if the kids have told him it's okay). maybe 1 time in 100 (or less) i might hear a smart mouth answer, and we deal with that, too (or if it's from a friend, we deal with it by later discussing how we don't do that in our family).

as for calling adults by their first name, I think it's good manners for kids to call adults by whatever the adult wants to be called. I prefer that kids and adults call me by my first name. So do most of my friends. I tell my kids to call somebody "Mr. or Ms. Lastname" until asked to call them something else. I'm sure it's a regional thing, but where I live most people ask them to either call them by their first name or by "Ms. or Mr. Firstname".

i don't think school is for teaching manners. i think that's up to the parents.