When did parenting change so?

Question

Reading answers in this section plus first hand sight of parenting today of relatives and friends, I just had to ask when parenting changed so drastically?
I see ones cooking family meals, but if their under 6 y/o doesn't want that they will ask "what do you want me to get you"
Will you pick up your toys?
Will you go to bed?
Will you take out the trash for me?
Will you feed "your" dog for me?
Why did the school suspend you for fighting?? We'll sue them.
You have to have a car at 16, hmm your grades are bad but will you try to make C's next time?
Oh I won't spank you because it may damage you mentally, you can report me for child abuse, even if I caught you drinking at 12......
Do you mind making your bed up before you go spend time in town with all your friends?
Get the picture???? and we wonder why kids today have problems? They were never taught anything.

I am excited to see their are some real parents still out there..Thank God & God Bless you all and your families!

there not "their"

lol...as to the child in store throwing a fit answer...even the best of parents get those fits in stores..how could we live if we didn't have kids that did those? Its how we deal later with them though...Bless your children though & you

Answer 1

parents lay down the rules,and children must obey!that's it!
when i cook,you eat what i cook or you go to bed hungry!
clean up your room,or I'll take the toys away,and give them back when you do as you're told!
you set some rules and chores and these must be followed!
you also,give your children the love and attention that they need!play with them,take them places!
being a teacher,i have seen the children of those "soft"parents,and they are the most disruptive in class!they have no discipline and therefore have a hard time following orders and rules!and they have the lowest grades!i have also seen the opposite,too!parents being too strict,and their children find that the time that they are not under their parent's scrutiny,become like wild children,set loose!
so what we need,is a balance,strict,but not too strict,freedom but not too much freedom!

Answer 2

Ha! I agree with you 100%. I was an elementary school teacher and I saw this kind of parenting from soooo many parents. And you know what? It was those parents' children that always had behavior problems. Then the parents would blame everyone but themselves or the child. They never taught their children (or themselves for that matter) any responsibility for their actions. My in-laws think I'm evil for giving my 2 year old time outs and because I said I would spank him in an extreme circumstance when he's older. I don't believe in regular spanking, but lets face it... sometimes a kid needs one. But kids are also kids, and I hate it when other parents publicly criticize another parent because their 3 year old is throwing a fit in the store. Toddlers throw fits... that's what they do. It doesn't mean the parent is a bad one and it doesn't mean the kid is a brat. The most well behaved kids will throw fits sometimes. It's just part of being a kid.

Answer 3

lol. Some paretns just make me shake my head, lol. My daughter is 8 years old and amazing. I can't believe some of the things her friends will do at their own homes. I believe that there are a few factors. We used to be a very suppressed society. Religiously suppressed and authority repressed. It didnt' matter if your grandparents were mistreating you, you were to show respect, even to the people that hurt you because of their age. If you dared to break a rule, you were spanked, had your mouth washed out with soap, or if you swore you had pepper or tabasco sauce put in your mouth, etc.. you get hte picture. I think that parents are trying to do better by their kids than they were, but are uneducated on how to go about it. I think that being 'too nice' to your kids is an abuse too, as you are not even preparing them for the world. That is your job! What they are donig is just as bad. I am hoping it will self correct as the next generation realizes what was done to them and the middle ground will be found. People are becoming more eduacated now about paretning. And I know that there are many wonderful parents out there, like me:):) lol...

Answer 4

I was actually wondering this same thing. I know alot of parents who won't spank their kids because it sends the wrong message. Those parents are emotionally drained all the time. The spend their entire day doing timeouts or talking it out. All it would take is one little pat on the butt to put your kid in check. After all you are raising your child not the other way around. I also work with alot of parents who at any age will let their kids drink at home because if they drink at home they won't go elsewhere and do it. ARE YOU NUTS - you have just sent the message to your child that you think drinking is ok. So congrats you've just created an alcoholic. I could never understand why these days we are letting our children make all the decisions - as you can see by how the world is changing they obviously can't. When I was in high school not one person I in high school was pregnant, and that was 7 years ago. Now you have at least 3 girls who are pregnant and they are so excited they are throwing baby showers and everything. It is sick. Sorry for the venting but I've been wondering this myself. Thanks : )

Answer 5

I don't ask my children to do things like that. At the beginning of the week they pick chores, and must do all of them every single day without being reminded. Their allowance is based on their chores, their free time is based on chores, etc.

As far as food; They eat what I cook 6 out 7 days, and friday's they pick from a small menu, but also help prepare it. If my 3 year old doesn't eat what we're eating, he will go to bed without dinner, period.

I agree parenting has changed for the worse, but please don't assume the child throwing a fit in the store is a brat. It could be my child!

Answer 6

Because somewhere along the line, people started thinking their parents, grandparents, greatgrandparents were HORRIBLE parents by giving their kids spankings when needed. And then these people now give their kids a whopping 5 minutes of time out, and wonder why they can't control them as teenagers, wonder why it is their kids throw tantrums in stores while Amish kids don't do that, etc.

While many parents understand this, many do not. Raising kids should NOT be a democracy. It should be a dictatorship. What mom and dad say is law.

Answer 7

Trust me, in my house it hasn't changed so much at all! My kids are TOLD to do something, MADE to follow rules and respect bounderies, and I absolutely DEMAND that they have certain standards of behaviour.
I see way too many parents being raised by their children, and I just cringe when I think about what kind of young adults those kids are going to grow up into.
I think nowadays there's too many liberal people telling parents to consider a child's fragile emotional state, and not enough common sense.

And guess what? I'm only 25, lol!

Answer 8

Nice point. Me... I'm a new mother.. my daughter is two. I don't ask her to do things I tell her to do things and she does them. My mom give in to my 14 year old sister. She has bad grades, is disrespectful and unappreciative, yet she can go out and spend the night and go to parties.

My daughter.. I don't think so. She will earn what she gets. Good grades are a must, chores must be done, rules must be kept. I refuse to let her be like my little sister. In my mind, we are here to be parents... not friends..... and it's tough love we have to give for them to be successful in the world.
:)

Answer 9

Life and people evolve dont they sometimes not for the better. I ahve to say I certainly agree with you on the 'will you......?' Children need to be told not asked. that is what is going wrong, kids are kids and need rules and boundaries. Some people give their kids a bit too much of a say dont you think?

Answer 10

I know exactly what you are saying.Most people will probably say that I am too strict because they said the same thing about my parents,but that doesn't bother me.I'm not gonna be a push-over & let my kids walk all over me.I agree with you totally.