My kids dad and his family want to visit my children. i dont want them to for reasons that i feel my daughters safety will be involved. we are in the middle of a custody case and i dont know how to say no and it seem like i am trying to keep him a way from his kids. i dont really mind if he comes by himself but i dont want his mom and brothers coming because i believe that one of his brothers molested one of my daughters. they are 3 yr old twins. how should i tell them all no so that i dont have to take the chance of him taking my daughters from me and i am just trying to keep them safe.
2007-12-28 13:12:46 · 7 answers · asked by hunniebees04 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
my kids dad is not my husband. we have not been together for over 3 years now.
2007-12-28 13:42:20 · update #1
* I have reported it to CPS and i have been on numerous appts tothe hospital, specialists, and her doctor. It happened Nov. 2006 do you think it is too late to get a report done now based on the evidence that was collected when it happened?
2007-12-29 08:58:55 · update #2
sounds like you need to start documenting! Documenting can be used in court.. keep dates and times and quote what they have said word for word. I would not let that person near my child... arrange a holiday or a reason that you are gone. And than dont' answer your phone when you get back or your door... just until his family leave. Watch what you say and dont' say things in anger in case they document too.
Good luck! Sorry I can't be more help
2007-12-28 13:21:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it is YOUR home they might visit in, you have the right to limit visitors and who is invited into your home.
If your child was molested, did you make a police report? Talk with her doctor or a psychologist? might be a good idea.
Setting personal boundaries for yourself isn't a bad thing... and saying "NO" is part of setting boundaries. You can say NO so do it... don't let people walk all over you.
If you feel his mother would be ok, tell her to come over on a separate occasion, alone! If she objects to coming alone, then it's her problem not yours... and have you told her about your suspiscions?
If you don't report your suspiscions about your daughter being molested to a doctor and/or the police, there is definitely something wrong with you, too.
i hope it works out.
2007-12-28 22:37:37 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, do your daughters enjoy spending time w/ their father and his family? I ask because my duaghter HATES going to her dads, and I spoke w/ a lawyer and she told me that all I can do is encourage her to go, but I don't have to physically make her go anywhere she feels uncomfortable. Also, if they don't have their own private place to sleep at night, they don't have to go. My daughters dad thought it was alright for her to sleep in bed w/ him, or have her in the bed and him on the floor. NOT!!! If she doesn't have her own room, she doesn't go. Period.
Also, don't feel bad telling his family no. Its their father that has rights to visitation, not the brothers. Have you spoken w/ their father about what you think happened w/ one of his brothers? I would tell him that they are NOT to be alone w/ thier uncle EVER, NO EXCEPTIONS!! And make sure you bring this up in court.
2007-12-28 21:28:14 · answer #3 · answered by Shell_Lynn99 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to stick up for your kids they are number one! You need to tell your dad your conserns, when something like that happens to a child they never forget.
2007-12-28 21:19:35 · answer #4 · answered by shelle4392 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you tell him the truth even though he maybe doesn't live with you he might still have a little bit of feelings to respect your wish.
2007-12-28 22:26:02 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say no. You do not have to let any of the family come.
2007-12-29 00:16:47 · answer #6 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just say no i dont care if you come but i dont want your brothers here......
2007-12-28 21:18:03 · answer #7 · answered by ~mumof2boys~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋