I cheated but am i guilty?

Question

Im 18. I cheated on my boyfriend of 6 months with a guy I was interested in way before we started dating (we all know each other). We broke up for a day. That day I cheated on him. I only did it because I am almost certain...scratch that. I AM certain he is cheating on me. He doesnt know I cheatedon him. But he aslo doesnt know that I know he's cheating on me. I love this guy. I don't want it to end. But I know it has to. I so afraid of being hurt. Someone, Anyone, please help me out.

Answer 1

I think you should talk to him about how you feel. If you want to be in a great relationiship - you need to be able to talk to your partner about things. If you don't feel you can talk to him - then perhaps he's not the one. However, only you can know that.

Cheating is about making mistakes. We're human, we do that. Don't end a relationship just because of that. If you are considering ending the relationship do it because you're not in love with him - or he's not in love with you. Think about it - and talk about it.

Also, don't let your relationships (or your life) be dictated by fear. Be who you want to be. Don't be afraid of making mistakes - they help us discover ourselves and help us learn what we really want. Just don't do nothing - you WILL regret it if you wait too long to do something about it.

In the end, you must do what you think is right. Good luck!

Answer 2

guilty of what?
I'm sure you've heard the old saying "two wrongs don't make a right".
If he cheated, and you were so hurt that you went out and cheated, are you trying to hurt him back?

It's all based upon trust and respect...or lack thereof.

You obviously don't have a trusting or trustWORTHY relationship. Perhaps considering why either of you has the need to be unfaithful may help you move on.

Yes, sometimes our emotions get the best of us, and in a moment of weakness, we succumb to the physical desires of someone we are with at that moment....but COME ON.
You are admitting that this is not spontaneous...you went out and cheated when you broke up for a DAY. That is revenge, not innocent lust.

I won't judge you...I don't know you and its unfair to blindly put a label on you, but from what you've said, it sounds like neither of you is ready for a mature relationship. You are vulnerable and insecure, needing validation, and would rather be in a poorly structured relationship than not have one. Am I on the right track?

Somewhere inside of you, you know what to do. You KNOW that you need to move on., and you KNOW it's going to hurt. But what you need to look at is the road ahead.

It will take all of the courage you have, but make a clean break, and spend some time without a boyfriend. Concentrate on who you are, and what you want in life. If you create a "road map" of what you are seeking, in your personal, career, romantic life elements, you will have a better idea of how to get there without running into obstacles like this.
No one ever has a successful vacation getting into a car without maps, enough food, clothes and money to last for the trip. Planning ahead is the key.
Good luck.

Answer 3

baby girl If your so certain that you man is cheating on you then why didn't you end the relationship when you found out. you made yourself look really crazy by cheating on him and now your feeling guilty. Come on lets be real two wrongs don't make a right. Lessoned learned. And yes you should be guilty because you didn't have enough guts to approach your man with this situation at hand.

Answer 4

You say you two broke up for a day and during that day you had sexual relations with another man. Then technically it is not cheating because you were broken up at the time.

You say you know for a fact that your boyfriend is cheating on you, then why is he worth keeping around? There are better men out there in the world that is waiting for a girl just like you. Do not stay in a relationship that is not working out just because you're afraid of getting hurt, in the end, staying in this relationship will hurt you more.

Answer 5

You are guilty of cheating, but it sounds like you are trying to justify it with this other info. If you thought he was cheating, you should have stayed broken up for more than a day. You both need to come clean, and then move on. Relationships are built on trust and honesty, and you two aren't being honest or trustworthy to each other. And if you two continue, you will always suspect the other of cheating in the future, and it will ruin your relationship. You should just move on, and learn from this experience/mistake.

Answer 6

What a mess, My advice to you is to start being a real person, it will never be good living a lie, do you really have to ask if you are guilty? look in the mirror and ask that question, the answer will be obvious ( two wrongs have never made a right)...after all you first have to be honest with yourself before you can hope to be honest with anybody else. as far as being hurt...can't help you there, pain comes with the things that have been going on in your life ( some you caused others your B/F caused ) being hurt and hurting others sucks but putting off the hard but needed truth makes it even more torturous.

Answer 7

Well, if at the time you were broken up and you thought it was over, no, you weren't cheating. If you knew you would be back together soon--maybe so. But the real issue here is that you would even consider staying with him. If you know he is cheating, walk away. It's really easy to make 100 justifications so that you can just go on and pretend it isn't happening. But he is doing it now and will continue to. He isn't worthy of you...be done with it. Yes, that will hurt and for a long time, but eventually you will look back and be proud that you are not a woman who puts up with this. This will make a difference in your outlook years from now.

Answer 8

You know you have to end it. With all this high school drama you think he's the one and you get so caught up on relationships but if he was the one first off he wouldn't be cheating on you and secondly you wouldn't of had a one night stand with a guy right after breaking it off.

Break it off with him. You both can't communicate with each other. You lie to each other. There is NO reason to be together.

Answer 9

Just break up with the guy whos cheating on you in the first place. Then you won't have to ask silly questions. And you're 18 for goodness sake!

Answer 10

I know you said you're afraid of being hurt, but doesn't it hurt to know that he's cheating on you? You don't deserve to be with someone who cheats on you... there are too many diseases out there that he could bring back to you... and then where would that leave you?

It sounds like you don't want to be alone, but it doesn't sound like this is a healthy relationship. If you're certain he is cheating on you, you should end it. If your cheating really was a reaction to his cheating, I understand your hurt... but do yourself a favor and get out of the relationship! There will be other men who will treat you like you deserve, who you will want to treat like they deserve.

Answer 11

Dear Jelly, I hate to say it, but I'm sure you want an honest answer. I know many people who dated in the exact same situation your in and had somehow decided to stay together and eventually even got married. They still cheat on each other. I know it will hurt but my advice is move on and don't get involved with anyone until you let yourself get a fresh perspective on things.