She is also my mother in law's only grandchild and my parent's granchild (they have two more, but they live accross the country). Basically, she is the only baby in both sides of our family, so needless to say, she gets a lot of attention, has lots (tons!) of toys, etc. Aunts, uncles, friends, etc. are always coming over to play with her. At her recent first birthday party, a friend who also has a baby around the same age told me that I am going to have problems with my daughter, including holding attention spans, focusing on one thing at one time, problems in school, etc., because of all the toys and attention she gets right now. My daughter is a very happy baby or should i say toddler, who rarely cries or throws tantrums. My husband and I make sure we provide a loving, nurturing environment for our daughter. I am not sure how to take her comments. Any advice on this?
2007-12-28 02:59:27 · 12 answers · asked by motherhoodisthebest! 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Do you feel like your daughter has too much? Does she regularly freak out if you tell her no? If you have structure in your household and she is okay with listening when you tell her something, then she is probably okay.
I have a son that is five years old and an only child. He is the youngest and the first boy for both sides of the family (and the only for my parents as well). What we do is ask the family to 'limit themselves' to the number of toy gifts they buy him and to buy him clothes, shoes, etc, or to get him a savings bond or money for his savings account. They like to see him wearing things they have gotten him, and he will always say "this is my train shirt from Meme" or "Mom these shoes from Aunt D are cool". We do have some family members that still get him loads of toys because they want to, but most of them want him to have something he will use. It b\alances out in the end though.
Best of luck!
2007-12-28 03:15:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore it.
You may want to limit the amount of toys she's playing with at one time but there's no harm in having lots of toys.
As for attention... there's nothing wrong with that either as long as you teach her share and care about others.
My father, a therapist, has always said that children who were surrounded by loving, caring family and friends and received plenty of attention grew up to be secure, happy and stable adults because they were secure as children.
Let your little one bask in the glow!
My little brother (12 years younger than me) was the youngest grandchild/cousin/sibling by a decade and at 15 he's one of the most confident, loving and independent people I've ever known. He was SHOWERED with affection his entire life.
2007-12-28 11:12:18 · answer #2 · answered by Rachel B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The woman must have read some article(1 article) on raising children and the affects of 1 child....blah, blah, blah. Don't take this advice too seriously unless your friend is a reknowned psychologist. Your daughter is probably getting a balance in her daily life which is what children need. By nurturing her into the next stages of life, is what makes you a good parent. Keep on parenting!
2007-12-28 11:06:36 · answer #3 · answered by anaise 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a much loved child, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that! In fact, the more secure that she feels during her infancy, the more secure and independent she will be as she grows. You and your husband are setting your child up for success.
Honestly, your friend might be feeling a little bit jealous. Maybe she doesn't have the same extended family and feels the need to rain on your parade. Just kill her with kindness.
2007-12-28 11:14:23 · answer #4 · answered by manda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore it. To stop their kids from being spoiled, my aunt and uncle promote giving, like a school charity fund raiser. Their kids will give about the same as others in their class, but they also anonymously give to the office too, so its not part of their class amount. Give to toy mountain (kids pick toys out to give away.) Volunteering at the hospital at Christmas with kids.
2007-12-28 11:05:58 · answer #5 · answered by Bridget S 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweet, as we say in Portuguese Language: "short and BROAD": Your "friend"that have another same aged child is only jealous! She is being selfish! She is being ENVIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Almost she could be a good friend , she is human and MOTHER and that explains! Only one more feelling, sweet, and your first child lover; "Dogs don't bit çause they are BAD , but because they are DOGS!!!!! Applied to your question ,,, (some learn to bit with its idiotic owners, but it does'nt matter right now)
Sympaty on you and your (seems "ex
cellent") husband!
Greetings. Enjoy, enjoy , enjoy, motherhood is really the best and your beloved little "thing"!!!
are in a great mood, believing in your letters...
2007-12-28 21:48:35 · answer #6 · answered by smoothoperator 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like the friend that told you that is a little jealous!! As long as you and your husband make sure to let her know about working hard for what she wants she will be just fine. I never knew that being loved and spoiled caused ADD?!!! Your daughter is going to be just fine!!! You are truly blessed!
2007-12-28 11:07:15 · answer #7 · answered by Jerry M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you are doing the best you can. I don't think that is true,because it is good for kids to get attention,helps them learn.sounds like she is loved, and will have lots of help when it is time for school.
2007-12-28 11:10:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Aparently now its a bad thing to have a close knit family? Forget what that woman said!
2007-12-28 11:07:24 · answer #9 · answered by Karla 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ignore it i dont see why her receiving a lot of attention would cause those problems
2007-12-28 16:13:50 · answer #10 · answered by cj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋