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When I was 15 and my boyfriend was 18, we "exchanged videos" if you know what I mean. Stupid, I know, especially on my part. I have since deleted all of his videos, but he still has mine on his computer and a DVD disk. I recently brokeup with him and I wanted No Contact whatsoever because he isn't someone I'd want to have contact with. However when I bring that up, he threatens to send the videos to my mom or put them online. I am really scared. He says things like "So I guess your mom is going to get a nice little present" or "If you keep making me mad I'm going to send her the videos" I actually recorded him admitting to having them and saying HOW exactly he would send them to my mom. I want some help. What should I do? He is a very manipulative and threataning person and I know he is using these videos as blackmail so we still remain in contact. Please, any advice?

2007-12-28 02:15:14 · 21 answers · asked by Apple S 2 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

I'm 16 now

2007-12-28 02:15:28 · update #1

21 answers

Let him send them. Since you're under 18 that makes it child pornography. When the police trace it back to him he'll be getting a nice jail sentence.

2007-12-28 02:20:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3 1

OMG... girl.. my ex did almost the same thing. We made ONE... video and I didn't even want to do that at the time. He kept the dvd and I had a dvd of it. We broke up and things kept happening. His new girlfriend would send threatning messages trying to destroy my reputation, a supposed friend of hers was emailing me.... and he threatened that if I ever spoke to him or his girl ever again he would post that video on the web.

So I understand what you're going thru. First of all, if he post it you can file legal action on exposing a minor online. CHILD PORNOGRAPHY!!! Serious time! Also, blackmail is blackmail. If you're mom see's it then she will be angry but I think more angry at HIM than you! SERIOUSLY. He has no right to do that and you're a minor so it's a double no no!

You need to step on his toes and remind him that he's a grown man and you are still legally a child and posting those videos is breaking a law and you will have him arrested, and tell him to leave you alone. Either that, or you can go ahead and tell the police and FBI, they will find the material and arrest him anyway!

:) Good Luck.

2007-12-28 10:25:35 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 1 0

EMAIL HIM THIS PAGE!
Sometimes during disputes like this, if you tell the police and let them hear the message and file a report, they'll go by and try to retrieve the copy, deeming it your property. Whatever he has on his laptop may be a little tricky. Having police contact/visit him may scare him enough though-especially if they see that you filed an official report.
My next advice is easy, yet hard. Tell your mom about the DVD, tell her about your sexual acts (mildly). Prepare her for the letdown if he really shows her. Then, next time you talk to him, tell him "it's whatever, I already told my Mom". If he has balls that big, then he still may do it. Then it'll work out because your Mom already knew, he'll have no more blackmail, and then the police will follow through with your initial report. (Before all of this, you may even be able to get an order from the cops for him to stay away from you and your family. Then, when he gives the tape, he'll violate it and they'll handle him on another level.)
Don't you live in fear another day because of this perv. Good luck, girl.

MATTER OF FACT, EMAIL HIM THIS PAGE OF RESPONSES. THAT'LL MAKE THAT SICKO BACK DOWN FOR SURE!

2007-12-28 10:27:55 · answer #3 · answered by Crissy 3 · 1 0

When someone is threatening you, you take away the threat. You go to Mom and you say... "Mom, I did something really stupid a while back, and "exBF name" is threatening to show you if I don't stay with him. Mom... I can't stay with him. He's manipulative and threatening and a really bad person. I'm really scared. I didn't want you to know these things... it's so embarassing.... but I'm more scared of being with someone who would treat me this way. Can you help me, please? I'm so sorry, I just really need you to help me out of this situation. I promise I'll never do anything this stupid again..."

Mommies protect their babies. It's our nature. If my daughter came to me with this... I'd be upset with her, but mostly I'd want to protect her from this boy.

And as far as posting on youtube... you and your Mom can contact youtube (or whatever service or web host he uses) and tell them you are underage and that the video must be removed. You can do this through a lawyer if a simple notice fails.

You and your mom can tell the boy that you've contacted the lawyer and you know what to do if he posts the video online since you were underage... and that he could potentially go to jail. Scare the sh***t out of him...

It will all turn out OK. It's just going to be be a bit stormy getting there. You can do it. Never let a blackmailer get away with it. Outhink him. Outsmart him....

:-)

2007-12-28 10:26:09 · answer #4 · answered by Twice as Nice 3 · 3 0

You can actually sure him for extortion. He's 19 now I'm assuming so next time he brings that up tell him that if he does show anyone you will sue him with blackmail and extortion. Those are very very heavy crimes to be charged with and he can serve up to 2-5 years easy if he gets convicted.

Actually don't give him a heads up just go straight to the police and tell them he has incriminating videos of you and he is extoring you with them. Most likely he will be notified and asked to surrender the tapes to you and any copies he made of them and if he does not comply then off to the slammer with him.

2007-12-28 10:20:15 · answer #5 · answered by Adeptus Astartes 5 · 2 0

Talk to the police! If this videos show nudity or stuff like that, he is in possession of child porn! That is illegal. That will teach him to blackmail you. The down side is that your Parents will probrably burn your webcam.

Seriously, this is not laughing matter. This could have a serious impact on your life. Tell the police and play the tape for them. Don't mention it to him (what you are going to do) and the police will raid his house and he will be in TROUBLE!

Good luck.

2007-12-28 10:22:16 · answer #6 · answered by yogurt777 3 · 2 0

wait a minute!!! THAT IS ILLEGAL, tell his sorry behind you are going to the cops if he even tries it. 15 and 18, no no. I bet that will make him think twice.

If anything you have to give mom the heads up, tell her you were drunk because he put something in the punch or some K in your drink lolol.

Moms can be understanding. Just come clean so it's no shock late to her and this stress will go away. You can just turn around and tell him to shove it because it won't matter. I know it'll be hard to tell her but you kinda have to so that what if factor goes away and he has NO hold on you anymore. THEN plaster his all over the net ;) Just expect him to do the same to you.

2007-12-28 10:20:02 · answer #7 · answered by theresa_uop 2 · 3 1

Tell him the truth--it is ILLEGAL AND A CRIMINAL ACT TO HAVE TAPES, PHOTO'S ETC OF A MINOR. (It does not matter if you are over the age of 18 now, the materials were taken of you as a minor.) He will go to prison. What he is doing is also blackmail. Feel free to contact the FBI or District Attorney's office. He won't be showing the material to anyone once the feds come to him and arrest him and take his material.

2007-12-28 10:23:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

This idiot can always SELL those photos to a porn site for pedophiles.
You need the police involved in this.
He is committing a crime as you were and still are underage and he is 19 now.

Go to your nearest police precinct and ask to speak to a female policewoman. You'll feel more comfortable with her.

He can ruin your future.

He could be facing jail. Don't mess with threats. Just do this.

2007-12-28 10:34:19 · answer #9 · answered by ed 7 · 0 0

I've got news for you babe, if you were 15 at the time that is CHILD PORN! He can show it to anyone he wants if he wants to get charged with a felony and go to prison. I would suggest to him that he delete all traces of that video before someone else sees it and turns him in. Not to mention he was 18 at the time which makes him an adult. I think after you inform him of this little detail your problem will be solved.

2007-12-28 10:18:13 · answer #10 · answered by TG 6 · 2 1

If he's 18, and he trafficks in any way with videos involving sexual conduct by underage girls, then he'd be violating some serious laws.

Tell him that the next time he threatens to put your video online. Tell him you'll call the cops. That should put an end to his bravado pretty quick.

..

2007-12-28 10:21:31 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

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