Feeling like I'm a burden to my parents?

Question

I have a rare neurological chronic pain condition called reflex sympathetic dystrophy/complex regional pain syndrome. I require quite a bit of time from my parents because I have such severe pain and my medical condition has required a lo of doctor appiontments etc. I constantly feel like I'm a burden to my parents and others that I'm around even though I can not control the fact that I have this condition which requires much care. I'm also not able to help out as much anymore which makes things even harder on me. Any suggestions for making myself feel like I'm not such a burden?

I'm 15 years old

Answer 1

**HUG**

You have probably seen me answering enough questions in skating that I don't need to go into all the details so I wont -- I'll give you new ones!! :D

Anyway, my ten year old goes to the rink twice on Monday and Thursday, once on Tuesday and Wednesday. There are days I just don't want to go to the rink. It is cold outside (Illinois) and then it will be cold in there (even in the warm room) and I just don't want to have to go and make nice with a whole bunch of other moms and I don't want to drive ont he roads at that time in the morning and yeah on and on...

But I do.

Yeah, she and this skating things aren't what *I* planned for *my* life...

But you know what I do it because I love her so much (crying typing this).

And i figure if she is willing to get up at ugly early in the morning and go do this then she is my inspiration to do what needs to be done.

You parents love you, too.

If you are willing to fight against this condition, go to all the doctors, and the therapy (which I think you have said hurts), and do what you can then they are going to be right there with you fighting with you and for you when you can't.

Write them a letter and let them know what is going on when you can't say it with words.

**HUG**

Answer 2

The best advice I can offer is to do well in school and get good grades. You obviously are able to communicate at least through typing and your mind is fine so there is not reason you cannot get good grades and graduate and pursue higher education. Then you can get a job that you are able to do that pays very well and has insurance and retirement benefits. This will take the burden of worry off of your parents shoulders.

Any parent with a child that is ill does not feel they are a burden. They may feel burdened by the worry of what will happen to their child when they (the parents) grow old and die.

By staying focused on your education and getting a good job after college, your parents will be able to relax knowing you will have medical care and income and be able to afford a caregiver should you need one when they die.

Use the gift of your mind. Please do not waste it. God has given you this gift to help you through your life.

Answer 3

My dear, you are not a burden to your parents. Trust me. Naturally, they're concerned about you, and your illness may make things difficult at times, but they are your parents and they love you and want to do everything they can to help you. The only thing they expect in return is your love and respect. So please don't feel guilty or a burden. You didn't wish this on yourself. So just concentrate on feeling better. Talk things over with your parents. Ask them if you're a burden on them, and I'm certain the answer will be a resounding no! Good luck and I hope you get to feeling better through pain management and lots of TLC!

Answer 4

Remember your parents love you, and unconditionally.

Your family will go through phases and times will be good others will be stressful. Do the best you can to help out and know that you are doing your best.

No one can ask anymore than that.

I'm sure your family does not think of you as burden, you didn't ask for it to be like this and neither did they.

As you get older you may be able to find a job that will let you hire a personal care assistant, there are a lot of "work-from-home" jobs out there these days, and it will lift the burden off your parents.

Answer 5

Ok then maybe you shouldn't come in the door saying I want this and that. Al you need to do is find away to earn some money and if you want something than you are working to get what you want and not feeling like a burden. I find that when I earn my own money to get what I want it seems more important to rather than if it is given to me.

Answer 6

First of all, Realize that this is a condition it which you can't fix there for you have to live with it and your parents are going to have to help you! They are your parents and I am sure sometimes it frustrates them, but I am a parent and the love you have for your children out weighs any frustration that comes along with being a parent! Just think about the poor parents that have children that are constantly in trouble that they have to bail out all the time! That is something those children are causing and they are a burden, but you sweetie you are living with something no one can fix! All, you can do is love them and show them that you are ever so thankful that they are your parents!

Answer 7

When we leave the spirit world we come to earth to experience things and choose lessons that will further the progression of our souls. People that choose hard conditions, like illness are very highly evolved souls.This was all in your life's plan and was chosen by you and has a great purpose. Your parents chose you as you did them. Consciously you do not remember, but your souls do. Be at peace in your situation, nothing happens by chance, either for you or your parents. You are not a burden, you are a light to them weather you know it or not. These are all great lessons for the both you and your parents. You are right where you are supposed to be and them, at this given time and place in your lives. I am so sorry for your pain, I know what that is like to have chronic pain, you sometimes feel that you are going to loose it. You are in my prays, God bless.

Answer 8

You are their child, they love you, take comfort in that. This is not something you can help or change. However, you can tell your parents how much they mean to you. Tell them you appreciate their help, love, and kindness, let them you wish you could help more. This is probably pretty hard for them too, so knowing how much you appreciate and love them can only help. Let them know how you feel, never be afraid to share your feelings with those who love you.

I guarantee you that if you told them you felt like a burden they would tell you, you're not a burden. They will tell you they love you, and nothing will change that.

Answer 9

Honey, you've been dealt an unusual hand in life. Most parents that have special needs children feel blessed and lucky. They feel that they have been chosen as parents to be able to handle your needs.

Even though your care requires an inordinate amount of their time and attention, they love you unconditionally.

Just tell your folks how much you love them and truly appreciate their support. Ask them what you can do to help out. - they will have a better idea about your capabilities.

Answer 10

Trust me on this one because I'm a parent. You're parents WANT to do this for you. When you're a parent and you can't make your child better you have to feel like you're doing SOMETHING to help. This is their SOMETHING!! Don't feel guilty. You have enough to worry about. Be grateful that you have the parents and family that you have (which I'm sure you are). I'm sure that's all they would need to hear in return.