I'm probably 12 weeks pregnant right now, and my husband and I have been putting off telling my 13 year old the news for a few weeks now. I can tell she's beginning to suspect something, but I'm not sure how I should break the news to her. Any suggestions?...
2007-12-27 13:00:47 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Whats so bad about telling her?
She's 13 and she's old and mature enough to know
I'm sure she'll be delighted and very excited!
It will make her feel really responsible and important when the baby is born to mind him/her and help you!
So, You and your husband should break it quite casually to her, like when your having dinner or tea, say something in a positive happy way like "Guess What, I've got brilliant news"
and if she is suspecting something then she'll be OK with it!
Good Luck!
2007-12-27 13:29:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell her asap otherwise she might feel like you don't want her involved the longer you leave it the more likely she is to feel left out.It's hard enough for older kids when theres a new baby as it's inevitable they're going to get less attention.
Maybe once you've told her throughout your pregnancy you and your husband make an effort to spend time with your daughter if thats what she wants and if she doesn't like the thought of the baby encourage her that a baby will be great for you as a family just don't permenantly go on about the baby to her and you can tell her she wont get left out and stuff.
good luck
2007-12-27 21:40:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thirteen is a tough age. She's become used to having you all to herself and now she faces loses a lot of attention.
Start off slow. Ask her out to a cafe or somewhere she likes to hang out. Then sit her down and say something to the effect that " Daddy and I would like to share our happiness with you that we're going to have a little baby". If you immediately let her know that she is a part of the happiness and excitement, it will soften the blow for her.
If she responds well, or even indifferently (very likely with a young teen), then you can ask her to help you shop for the baby. Again start slow, take her to a baby store and just let her walk around and make decisions on her own. For example, say you need to buy pajamas. Tell her that's what you're shopping for, and then allow her to pick out an outfit, and BUY IT. The important thing is that you let her have a say in something, so she feels she has some control. When the baby arrives, try to dress it in the outfit your daughter chose, no matter how much you may not like the color /style. Your daughter needs to know she is just not along for the ride.
You can also ask her advise on decorating the baby's room or chosing stuffed animals.
If she is upset and inconsolable (another very likely scenario), give her some time to take in the info. It's very overwhelming to know that another person is coming in to take away your parents love, affection and attention. She is still just a child herself and her greatest fear is that you're 'replacing' her. Allow her to cry, yell, get upset, but within reason. When she's calm you can talk to her again, about what is so threatening to her and then LOVE LOVE LOVE her, so she knows this isn't a division of love, but a mulitplication of love.
Good luck and congrats on the new little one.
2007-12-27 13:12:53 · answer #3 · answered by N S 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Dont tell her until the baby is born. She might like run away or kill herself. Um if she notices your fat tell your ur a hungry betch. Oh and that sucks you must be old to have a 13 year old daughter so eww. Oh and um last thing she'll know you and your husband have been you know screwing and that's tramatizing for a betch.
2007-12-28 06:38:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i could be so offended if my 13 y/o have been given pregnant. I applaude you for no longer castrating her there and then! you have 3 recommendations here. she will the two placed the toddler up for adoption, abort it or you are able to boost the toddler as your very own. As a baby, i develop into raised by employing my nana. My mum develop right into a teenage mum, which lower back then, develop into very unparalleled. She develop into 17 whilst she had me and that i develop into raised by employing my super grandmother till i develop into 4, and then i develop into raised by employing my grandmother. In that element, my mom went lower back to college and ended up with a level in nursing. whilst i develop into seven, I moved in with my mum through fact she would desire to finally arise with the money for to be my familiar care giver. in the journey that your daughter needs an abortion, she desires to be sure that she relatively needs one. i understand a woman who had an abortion at fourteen and now feels so undesirable approximately it that she's had fourteen babies that she will't arise with the money for. She desires to understand what she's doing. in case you go with to place the toddler up for adoption, possibly choose for an open adoption. this provides her time to become a youthful woman and enables her to work out and have a relationship together with her baby. inspite of each thing, it is her baby. Plus, it is going to recommend that a relatives different than yours can defend the youngster and which means that in case you experience which you won't be able to arise with the money for or have the time to boost this toddler, you do no longer would desire to rigidity. i'm hoping you help her to make the ideal determination and that i choose you the ideal of success.
2016-11-25 21:09:40 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just be honest with her and stress that she can be as much or as little as a help with the baby as she wants so she doesn't feel like you'll use her as your own personal nanny. She's old enough to understand but she's young enough to still feel hurt and replaced. Try to spend as much time with her as you can before the baby comes too.
2007-12-27 13:06:29 · answer #6 · answered by Brandie C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your the parents you don't have to do that much explaining, maybe you and her can have an evening together and
start out by telling her how much you love her and how
much she means to you and then kindly break the news,
make sure you let her that she's your girl !!!
2007-12-27 13:45:45 · answer #7 · answered by koko 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok..umm..just tell her wats it going to hurt...if u tell her and she doesnt want a sibling tell her to get over it and say im not getting an abortion.......god u sound like a freakin teen tryin to tell her mom shes pregnant...god just get it over with u big baby...
2007-12-27 14:21:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
like nike says
Just do it
but dont like freak her out by saying "we have soething we need to tell you" and like sit her down
do it in a random way that will make her laugh
like at dinner take a sip of something and be like "well im pregnant"
thats what my parents did to me,
and if that happens to me that is what ill do to my kids
2007-12-27 13:05:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
You're gonna tell her..for sure.
And when you do, smile and be happy. She'll understand this is your happiness...
by the way, what made you not anyways?
2007-12-27 16:46:53 · answer #10 · answered by Yuri Ebihara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋