After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another man
on her night stand by the bed. He begins to worry. "Is this your
husband?" he nervously asks.
"No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him.
"Your boyfriend, then?" he continues.
"No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear.
"Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires,hoping to be reassured.
"No, no, no!!!" she answers.
"Well, who in the hell is he, then?" he demands.
"That's me before the surgery."
2007-12-27 09:41:47 · 15 answers · asked by micho 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, "If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your
head and kill you."
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.
He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road.
Once again the voice shouted, "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die."
The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
The man asked. "Who are you?"
"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.
"Oh, yeah?" the man asked "And where the hell were you when I got married?"
2007-12-27 09:42:23 · update #1
Two weasels are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, 'I slept with your mother!'
The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do.
The first again yells, 'I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!
The other says: 'Go home dad, you're drunk.'
Two cows in a field one turns to the other and says "moo" they other turns and says "you fcuker I was gonna say that"
two ghosts at the dinner table one asks the other"can you pass the salt please"
the other replys "who the fcuk said that"
2007-12-27 09:43:58 · update #2
A man takes his father to the doctor.
At the office, the doctor tells the old man, "I'm sorry, sir, but you have lung cancer. You'll be dead in a year."
On the way home, the old man turns to his grief-stricken son and says, "Quit all that cryin'! I'm not depressed. I've lived 75 great years. How 'bout you and me go to my favorite bar and have a couple beers with my friends?"
So while the guys are having their beers, the old man breaks the news to his friends. "Fellas," he says, "I'll be dead in a year 'cause I got AIDS."
On the way home, his son asks, "Dad, why did you lie to your friends?"
His dad replies, "'Cause when I die, I don't want them trying to **** your mother!"
2007-12-27 09:45:01 · update #3
I thought they were all really funny! Except the ghost one that one was a little corny--But other then that I liked them!
Thanks 4 The Laughs!
2007-12-27 09:52:17 · answer #1 · answered by Springsteen 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
staggering maximum 8-10 some 7/10, i've got have been given one for you.... a guy tells his well-being care expert his spouse hasn’t needed intercourse for months, and the well-being care expert shows a consultation together with her. so the spouse comes into surgical technique and tells the well-being care expert: ‘each morning, i take a cab to artwork. I in no way have any money on me, and the driving force continuously ask: ‘So, are you going to pay at present, or what?’ and that i take the ‘Or what’ option. ‘which skill I’m late attending to artwork, the place the boss asks me: ‘So, are we going to make an remark of your undesirable time-retaining, or what?’ and that i take the ‘or what’. ‘So by applying the time i'm getting homestead, I’m drained out and that i don’t desire any further intercourse.’ The well-being care expert pauses then asks: ‘So, are we going to tell your husband, or what?’
2016-10-09 06:28:51 · answer #2 · answered by lohmeyer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first one is my favorite! I like the badgers too. Last one was good. And the father and son in the bar made me laugh. Nana
2007-12-29 09:28:14 · answer #3 · answered by nanawnuts 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lmao!!!!!
10/10
2007-12-27 09:47:58 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs Adorkable 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I liked the first two but the other ones were kind of eh?
2007-12-27 09:47:48 · answer #5 · answered by Star City Girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love to wake up laughing!! Those were great! If I get a second cupo coffee, do I get more jokes...OK, I'll reread these!!!
Elysabeth
2007-12-28 00:21:47 · answer #6 · answered by Elysabeth 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didnt laugh at any of them, but the weasel one was okay :p
2007-12-27 09:51:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
all pretty funny i really liked the cow one and the first and last one.keep it up
2007-12-27 09:51:10 · answer #8 · answered by andrew 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
These were the BEST jokes I have heard in a while KARA
2007-12-27 10:19:05 · answer #9 · answered by COOKIE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say the first one and were bothe 10s... i didnt like the others
2007-12-27 09:53:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋