Husband is self-employed, and work has been slow during the holidays. His business depends on getting an appointment with the business owner of different companies. In late October, he had some business where he says he made $1500. However, the money never showed up in the bank, and he insists that the business has been pending due to applications that were not filled out correctly. He says he has to track the people down to get the apps corrected. Well, the apps were "corrected" last Thursday, but the money still hasn't showed up in our account yet. It was supposed to be there Monday. We really need the money due to our new mortgage payment and can't live off of my income alone. I'm starting to think he's lying. Do you think he's lying and what should I do? Should I accuse him of lying?
2007-12-27 04:59:28 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow.....cool down a little.
Has this happened before? Does it happen often?
These days with some of the insurance regulations when you work for a large company, or even some smaller ones, you have to file the correct insurance certificates with them before they will pay an invoice. Often they don't tell you this until they get the invoice. Your husband probably had to call his insurance agent and have them send over some paperwork. Once the company recieved it, they had to process it into their file and then clear the invoice for payment. Now it goes to an accounts payable department and usually companies pay invoice either once a month or twice a month. So that invoice is probably sitting in a pile of invoices waiting for the next pay cycle.
It's just the way things are done.
2007-12-27 05:14:36 · answer #1 · answered by nevit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm..it sounds like there is something going on that he might be trying to cover up. Obviously, there are more excuses being made than money. However, I would not suggust accusing him of lying. Men can be ultra sensitive when it comes to money. In my experiance, most men tend to feel like they need to be the breadwinners of the household. To take care of their wife. It is now getting more common for women to be the breadwinner. Even though it is more common, men still have old values instilled in their heads from when Mom and Grandma stayed home while Dad worked. So, the fact that you are the one bringing home most of the money in your household (you go girl!) your husband is probably feeling a little insuperior and feels that he is letting you down if he tells you that once again he has no money to bring to the table. Instead of accusing him of lying, sit down together and try to figure out how to improve the situation. Let him know you belive in him & his work but it is starting to get difficult for you to pay for everything. It sounds like he has been working on this a while now, maybe it's time he took on another job? Set a deadline "let's give it til________ for you to bring in income, and if it can't happen then you need to start looking for a new job." Emphasize on how you are feeling, not on his failures.
Good Luck!
2007-12-27 05:13:01 · answer #2 · answered by RED CHIC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not accuse him of lying...money is a major stress point, the holidays heighten that stress. If you have tried to help him as much as you can, then just find another way to pay the bills until the money shows up. Sounds like you have a bigger trust issue that you need to deal with...if that's the case you need to have a more focused conversation about trust not money.
2007-12-27 05:09:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you are asking others, this tells me that your trust in him is gone. Have you yourself seen any paperwork to show that the money is coming in? A lie is the worst thing to happen in any relationship. A person who lies is really lying to themselves and they are hurting themselves. "I'm starting to think he's lying." Have you told him how you feel? This could be a way to ask him what his motives are. This is also a way to prevent hurting your relationship if you love him.
2007-12-27 05:11:00 · answer #4 · answered by TryingtoSurvive 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This information he has provided you is no where near enough to make a determination if he's being untruthful. I'll need more than that to even wager an opinion.
In fact, anyone who can make a determination based on what little facts are available hasn't a clue as to how to conduct an investigation and determine if he's being evasive or not.
2007-12-27 05:10:55 · answer #5 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to him and tell him the mortgage is due and you need to right the check but you noticed the money is not in the bank yet. See what he says then.
2007-12-27 05:05:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know if he has lied before? I know you are a little upset right now, but you are going to be getting into some troubling waters if you accuse him of lying. Because that is going to include trust, his integrity, his honesty.
2007-12-27 05:06:21 · answer #7 · answered by Scott M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO GIVE HIM A LITTLE MORE TIME. MAYBE 2 WEEKS IF NOT JUST LET HIM KNOW THAT U DONT BELIEVE HIM AND CALL HIS JOB TO VERIFY THAT HE DID GET THE MONEY.
2007-12-27 05:04:59 · answer #8 · answered by SEXYCHICK2008 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
come on what month is it hes past lying
2007-12-27 05:07:15 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you already have accused him of lying. just pay the bills and stop complaining.
2007-12-27 05:04:32 · answer #10 · answered by Jerry M 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋