At what age can one begin spanking a child to correct them? The Bible says "Spare the rod & spoil the child."

Answer 1

I thought about this for more than a few moments, as it is a question that will draw polarized responses, and those will likely not answer anything.

The following was taken off the internet. It is has been given a lot of thought and provides a wider perspective on what many insist must be a focussed view.

It answers the biblical reference denial, explains it, and offers a good series of current suggestions with regards to adjuncts to spanking, as well as alternatives to it.

Here it is:

As the Bible tells us: "He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes" (Proverbs 13:24) and "Withhold not correction from a child: for if thou strike him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and deliver his soul from hell." (Proverbs 23:13-14)

To Spank or Not to Spank? (Fact sheet from the Rocky Mountain Family Council):

Is spanking an effective means of discipline for kids, or does it merely teach them to be violent? Fewer topics have generated so much emotion as whether to spank or not. First, what does the law say? Is it illegal to spank your kids? The answer is no-but parents who spank must be very careful to avoid running afoul of the law. Colorado law defines child abuse to include any case in which a child exhibits evidence of skin bruising, bleeding, failure to thrive, burns, fractures, etc. and the condition is not justifiably explained or the circumstances indicate that the condition was not accidental. For purposes of the child abuse law, parental discipline through spanking may not be justifiable if the child is bruised or otherwise injured. Thus, spanking is not illegal, but injuring a child is.

Apart from the legalities, is spanking a good idea? Does it work? According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, about 90 percent of U.S. parents spank, and about 59 percent of pediatricians in a 1992 survey said they support the practice. According to the academy, effective discipline has three key components: first, a loving, supportive relationship between parent and child; second, use of positive reinforcement when children behave well; and third, use of punishment when children misbehave. Many parents these days are fearful of using spanking as punishment, either because of the law or because they fear it teaches violence to their kids.

Some professional organizations of physicians and psychologists have suggested that spanking is detrimental and leads to family violence and child abuse. They have suggested that spanking teaches physically aggressive behavior which the child will imitate. But does the research support these assertions? According to the National Institute for Healthcare Research, more than 80 percent of the professional publications attacking spanking were reviews and commentaries, rather than quantitative research. When analyzing the small portion of quantitative studies that included spanking, more than 90 percent of these studies lumped together mild forms of spanking with severe forms of physical abuse without discussing why they did so. Thus, the professional organizations which advocated outlawing spanking evidently made their decisions without the benefit of the facts. Mild spanking and severe child abuse are not the same thing.

While spanking is not illegal, bruising or otherwise injuring a child is. But what about mild spanking as a corrective measure? Is it a good idea? Spanking works best when coupled with other disciplinary measures, such as "time out." Research regarding behavior modification of children ages 2 to 6 found that spanking a child two times on either the rear or thigh helped improve compliance with "time out" for misbehavior. These children were more likely to remain in their room after acting up if a potential spank followed if they left before the time was up. Furthermore, pairing reasoning with a spanking in the toddler years delayed misbehavior longer than did either reasoning or spanking alone. Reasoning linked with a spank was also more effective compared with other discipline methods. Talking with the child about what behavior is expected and why-with the potential of a follow-up spank-worked best.

According to Physician magazine, spanking should be used selectively for clear, deliberate misbehavior, especially a child's persistent defiance of a parent. It should be used only when the child receives at least as much praise for good behavior as correction for problem behavior. Verbal correction, time out and logical consequences should be used initially, followed by spanking when noncompliance persists. Only a parent should administer a spanking, not another person. Spanking should never be administered on impulse or when a parent is out of control. Parents sometimes need a time out too. Spanking is inappropriate before 15 months of age, should be less necessary after 6 years, and rarely, if ever, used after 10 years of age. Spanking should always be administered in private. Appropriate spanking only leaves temporary redness of skin, and never bruises or injures. Spanking works, but must be used thoughtfully and carefully in conjunction with other disciplinary measures.

Answer 2

At what age? Well, in this day and age there are so many other methods of punishing a kid that "spanking" isn't the only method (nor, for many, the best either).

Though a spanking can sure get the message through to the kid's brain very quickly.

But, haven't you read where it says:

SPARE the rod

and

SPOIL the child.

Why don't you try sparing the rod (not using it) and spoiing the child ... seems to me it would be a lot more fun to be spoiled!!!
.
IF you are going to "spank" the child, then at what age should you start? Well, it would seem the spanking should be "age appropriate"; in other words a spanking for a three year old would be a lot different than a spanking for a thirteen year old!
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Answer 3

He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes. From the King James version. The oldest finding of the proverb is in the late Middle Ages. Piers Plowman (1377) by William Langland wrote: Qui parcit virge, odit filium - which in English reads as Who-so spareth the sprynge (switch), spilleth (ruins) his children. (Virga is the Latin word for the birch rod.) ---You can find this on most any good old word search. I bring it up to point out that despite what Bible thumpers say-this notion that a good old beating is favored by God has been taken way out of context.

You can correct a child minus the beating and trauma of physical altercations. Children who are hit learn that you solve problems this way and will be more likely to abuse those that can't defend themselves. Not to mention that it will teach your child to behave or face a punishment from you. So the lesson will be if I can do this and not get caught I am clear. If you teach your child about being a good person and give them the ability to reason and process that behaving a certain way is just plain old the right thing to do you are less likely to have problems in the long run. But if you still feel you have to spank then start when the child is old enough to turn around and knock you for a loop in self defense.

Answer 4

Do you plan on teaching your child not to hit? If so, yes Spare the rod, but I never would suggest spoiling a child. He/she may and will run all over you. Discipline is not bad I believe that a child seeks it. You need to set boundaries and rules for your children to follow along with morals. They will respect and appreciate you for that when they get older and understand why you did what you did later on in life especially when they have children. May I suggest however or when ever you choose a disciplinary action for your child to make sure you tell them the reason behind it. Good luck.

Answer 5

If you are going to "spank" a child, then be sure that it is only an "age-appropriate" spanking. And, remember where it says: SPARE the rod and SPOIL the child. Consider sparing the rod, not using it. It would be nice to be spoiled too!! .

Answer 6

I feel that there is a time and place for everything. I have actually spanked my son before when he did something that I knew he understood was wrong, and could have potentially hurt him. I did question myself at first, but I am glad he does not run in the parking lot away from me anymore. I knew he understood what he was doing was wrong because before he did it, he gave me this sheepish grin and then took off. I do save this type of discipline for serious situations.
The main thing is to be consistent with whatever you do. If you do time outs, make him or her sit there about 2 minutes every-time you have to repeat yourself when saying no or stop more than twice. Also remember your tone balances with theirs, if you scream to be heard over theirs, it will only get worse. Use a stern voice, but not a very loud one. Your child will eventually get the point.
Redirection is the best thing I think for children under the age of one 1/2. Whenever they are doing something you don't want them to do just get them engaged in another activity and typically this works. They have such a short attention span, they will forget about whatever they were doing really quick.

Answer 7

I would say no sooner than 1 1/2 to 2 years and then it should only be a pop on the back of their hand. Don't make it a regular thing and it will be more affective when you feel you need to use this sort of punishment. Once they guy get a little older and the pop on the hand becomes unaffective, then you can start popping their behind when needed.

Answer 8

I would say you should begin around the time they start walking... Not with full-fledged spankings, but with pops/hits on the arms, hands or legs. Real spankings should not start until the child is at least 6 or so years old

Answer 9

NEVER! There are other ways to correct/discipline children than hitting them! And no, Im not talking about yelling. Tell the child that they are not doing something correctly and not to do it again calmly but sternly. There's no need to hit a child for making a mistake. That's plain wrong!!!!

Answer 10

I don't think a light tap is considered child abuse at all!! Every child needs discipline or they will grow up an a@%hole!! Start as early as you feel neccessary. Don't ever let anybody tell you that your abusing your child with a little butt whooping.