Im half indian so my family decided to arrange a marriage with this wonderful guy from india. everything went well and we started seeing each other. I asked him if he was serious with me and since then i havent heard from him. what i dont understand is that if he wasnt serious and didnt want marriage y did he get into the arranged marriage thing in the 1st place? he is 38 y.o. and im 20 y.o.. i just dont understand y he doesnt want me. im pretty (everyone tells me that) and im very nice. he even said i was very beutiful and he played with my long hair all the time.. i really dont know what to do. i was really hoping to marry him. y did he reject me? bc of him i spent xmas sick in bed crying. i had high fever and almost went to emergency. y would an old man refuse to marry a young girl?
2007-12-26 11:41:55 · 16 answers · asked by prettyinpink i 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Implicit in your story is the possible reason why this guy may not have reacted the way you expected.You seem to think or believe that he should feel lucky and flattered that a 20 year old beautiful girl with long hair wants to marry him at 38.Is that all you think men want in a wife arranged or otherwise?You said you were really hoping to marry him but why did you want to marry him---was it out of love or money or desperation or the arrangement or some other reason.While you have not yet shown that he has rejected you, I suggest that you get in touch with him and find out why he has been silent. Maybe you said something to offend him, or you are not as beautiful as you think , or do not act like an Indian girl is expected or supposed to act. Whatever is wrong , he will let you know and then you can correct anything within your power to correct. Meanwhile, get rid of the idea that all a man wants or need in a woman is that she be beautiful and nothing more.
2007-12-26 12:15:42 · answer #1 · answered by abbeycoolit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not getting married is not the end of the world. Now maybe that doesnt help.
But listen. You are 20 years old. Enjoy life, be young and free. This man does not want to marry you because he realizes that he may want to spend the rest of his life with a woman that is his equal. And it will take you atleast 10-15 years to be his equal. Remember this is an 18 year difference.
Looks are not the only thing important to a man. So work on your self, your career, your independence. And then look around and you will see man after man wooing you and begging you to marry them - YOU will have the choice not them.
2007-12-26 19:50:50 · answer #2 · answered by sandi10017 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well number one he is not an old man, trust me. I am 68, I'm an old man. Number two what does his age have to do with whether he married you are not? There could be a whole lot of reasons why he didn't want to marry you. Maybe he's gay? Maybe there was something about you that he just didn't like. Don't you ever seen males that appear to be very attractive, but there's just something about them that doesn't suit you? If you are nice-looking sooner or later you'll find someone who thinks you're really hot. It's not a big thing. Buck up and enjoy the rest of your holidays!
2007-12-26 19:52:38 · answer #3 · answered by krowtap 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't know how arranged marriages work, but I'm sure he didn't reject you. It was probably the thought of being married, not you, and it scared him off. I'm sure he found you beautiful. But if he is 38 and has never been married, he is almost certainly set in his ways. Maybe he is not ready for the committment. Some men never get to that point. And being married to someone you don't really know would be terrifying.
good luck. don't let yourself be sick over him. Sounds like you barely knew him.
2007-12-26 19:47:49 · answer #4 · answered by Leah 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
May be he found a younger one than you. I know how men from other countries like to have them very very young . Under 20 for sure. Look for another old man . Good luck!!!
2007-12-26 19:54:15 · answer #5 · answered by Just me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he realized how unfair it would be to you to have to marry him. Perhaps he would rather you find someone you love that will love you back. Beauty isn't everything. It seems like you have a very sweet heart and maybe he sees that too and just wants you to find someone who can give you the love you deserve.
2007-12-26 19:48:31 · answer #6 · answered by dramababy500 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how aweful things may seem, but it sounds like it does not have anything to do with you. In the long run, there could have been big problems. Trust me, things will be okay and the person that you are meant to be with .
2007-12-26 19:53:26 · answer #7 · answered by iamnotme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A 38 year old is not "an old man", for starters. He's probably got a few options and perhaps a silly girl who thinks that she just needs to be young and pretty to be all that an older man should desire in a wife, is not quite what he wants after all.
2007-12-26 19:47:41 · answer #8 · answered by Jules 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
I don't understand either. If I had a chance to marry a woman younger than me I would.
2007-12-26 19:47:55 · answer #9 · answered by Geno 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I must say you are better off with someone closer to your own age, unless you were interested in an older man's financial security, you will find someone, stop thinking about someone twice your age.
2007-12-26 19:48:46 · answer #10 · answered by fwatkins6 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋