Depression?

Question

I have never been really cheery but recently i have been worse than normal. Yesterday i asked a girl i really liked out and she said no. Rejection seems to be happening to me so much from women of late and im fearing its affecting me mentally. I thought it was just a build up of negative thoughts.


Then i found out today that a number of people have blocked me off of their msn messenger and just now i feel very alone. I have a great family and some really close friends but i dont know how many more hits my confidence can take.

I dont know what i should do. I have no real ambitions currently. Im on holiday from university and i just feel really low.
Obviously my university course is a goal but that is long-term. right now i have no short term goals.

Is it natural for constant rejection to affect someone in this way or is there something more to it?

Answer 1

My best advice for your situation is to be yourself and absolutely forget those people who don't want anything to do with you. You know what...it's their loss. You don't want anybody around you that doesn't want to be, do you? As for the girls....I know it doesn't seem like it now but you will eventually meet that soul mate. Hang in there and stop trying for awhile.

Answer 2

That's normal, rejection always hurts. My best advice would be to forget about those idiots that blocked you unless they had a really good reason to. If the girl just said no and didn't give you a reason, she isn't worth it. You have people that love you and want to spend time with you which, alone, says that you're obviously a nice guy. You made it to university, which means you're very smart and bright. Maybe you could try being more social? Just a thought, that way you could make more friends and maybe a girlfriend. If it doesn't help, and this depression is bothering you that much, I'd suggest seeing a therapist or psychologist. But before you turn to something like that, try talking about this with your close friends and/or family, that always makes a person feel better, knowing they have someone there for them.
Well, I hope I was of some help. Good luck, and best wishes. :)

Answer 3

Rejection, unfortunately, happens to us all. The worse part is that it usually happens all at once. You'll find that once you get into a relationship with someone, everyone will want a piece of you!

Why not set a mini New Year's Resolution for yourself as a short term goal? Something that's easily achievable in a month or so, like read a book that you've never read for example. Once you've acheived this mini goal, set yourself another, slighter harder one. You'll find over time that these little achievements add up to bigger ones and give your confidence a well deserved boost.

As for relationships, just be yourself. If you're feeling depressed then this is going to come across to potential partners. Concentrate on building your confidence up again before getting back into the dating pool. You''ll probably find that the ladies will more likely approach you if you take yourself out of the pool!

Chin up, young person.

Answer 4

If you would just consider that most of us a tired from the Christmas rush to get it all done on time,visiting with family etc. Most of us now look to take time out to rest and relaxation. Perhaps that is what you encountered with all these rejections. Look at this lightly, and it will soon pass. Find something you enjoy doing on your own, and some of your friends will surely be looking for contact with you......
Many feel depressed at this time of year, however, if you keep your thoughts positive, and try to get a 20 minute walk during the day,it will give you the vitamin D that will make you feel better about yourself and others, there will be new friends and girl to meet .There are New Yeas resolutions to think about, and have Happy, healthy peaceful and prosperous new Year!

Answer 5

Sure we prefer to be welcomed and accepted. Yeah its totally natural to be a little down when its not all pleasant and happy. Though think about this, if everything was brilliant all the time, surly that would get boring, hence its the variety that is the spice of life. How else would you know you were down if you'd never been happy if even only the once. Things will pick up just as sure they may go a little sad too again and happy....you get what I mean I hope. Keep the faith.

Answer 6

I have felt the same way you do more then once in my life. All I can say is things will get better. I know it sounds silly but life is like a roller coaster with a lot of ups and downs, your at the bottom now but soon you will be at the top again.

I have found a great website that has all natural remedies of things you can do for your depression. If you are against medication or just want to try something else first I would recommend you try some. I will send the links below also once your there do a search for anxiety they have stuff on that subject also.
Feel better
peace
GG
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/lift-de...
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/six-too...
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/are-you...
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/the-art...

Answer 7

Ah dude i really feel for you, and like others have already said on here, this is not the greatest time of year to connect with others and say be a signficant other to them, or priorty to them, as many people are really preoccupied and really spent emotionally and physically with all this holiday rush.....

In regards to people blocking you, yeah that does hurt because you want to feel wanted and acknewledged from others, even on this internet.. i don't want to put you down but maybe you came off to negative to them and they were tired of encountering it or perhaps they just were not people who were interested in being your freind.... but just write it off, people as you know come and go, and they were not for you... people can be a dime a dozen sometimes.. but quality people are far and few... unforunetly

i wouldn't say you have no ambition, your getting a university education, give yourself some credit for doing that, just because you are not totally sure on what you really want in the moment does not mean you have no ambition.... you will fall into your short term goals

i don't know if u workout or anything, but try joining a gym, spend more time doing things for you, this will lift some of that tension off you and give you physical and mental well being... maybe try doing some tanning sessions at the tanning salon 4 or 5 times a month, as sometimes if we are not getting outside enough in winter we have low vitamin D

your probabbly a goodlooking guy already, just down on his luck at the moment.. 2008 you'll get things moving...


best of luck!

Answer 8

Maybe have a good conversation with your close friends and family asking them what might be the problem with these other folks.

It may help you to seek out some counseling and talk about these things.

We all go through rejection, it hurts, but we also need to know how to cope with it too. Not taking it too seriously is the key. This person that you asked out, did she send you signals that she was interested? If not, you need to rethink who you ask out then. If someone is not interested, no good reason to ask them out and set yourself up for rejection.

Answer 9

Obviously your confidence is at an all time low... people can sense that, and that could be a reason you are getting rejected. I think you should concentrate on yourself, getting better and put dating aside for now.

Feel free to email me if you'd like to talk through your problems.

Honestly I think you could really benefit from some counselling - they can help you work on goals and talk through your problems.

Good luck hun.

Answer 10

You and I both. It does actually cause problems. I find myself just not caring about what I do, and I don't have too many people I hang out with because of my schedule (I work at a radio station, odd hours.) It's almost like a flat, boring feeling, and it's very depressing.

If you want, you can contact me at [e-mail] (I use Yahoo Italia even though I'm in the US.)