Mom & Dad vs Me?

Question

I really want to become Wiccan. But my dad doesn't think that it's a good idea and my mom doesn't want to talk about it.

My mom is Christian and my dad says that he is agnostic (which I doubt)

What should I do? Especially since I want books about the Wiccan religion.

Answer 1

Just do your research and seek your own path without your parents' input. You can stay in the broom closet for a while until you figure out what you want to do.

Answer 2

If you are under 18 and living in your parents' house, then you must respect their wishes. (I'm sorry, but I see this sort of thing a lot and I have to wonder why you want to become Wiccan, and just what you think a Wiccan is. It's not all about magic and spells - it is a serious spiritual path, and not an easy one at that - takes a lifetime of commitment and study, and learning how to accept the responsibility for and consequences of your actions.)

For now, all you can do is learn more about Wicca. There are good websites like "The Witches Voice" that you can read and learn a lot from. I wouldn't recommend practicing behind your parents back - dishonesty/deceit and disrespecting our elders are not Wiccan traits. If you continue to learn about Wicca now and still feel it is the right path for you when you are an adult, then you will be free to choose such a path at that time...and then you will have enough information to have an intelligent conversation with your family about it.

Answer 3

Well, for one, you should love and treasure your family. There is no greater magic than that. You can pray and meditate without books. You can spend time noticing the world around you and watching it bloom, fade and bloom again. You can develop your own ability to nurture. Especially learn to nurture yourself. You can sharpen your will and self discipline without one single book about Wicca, or a spell written by another hand. You can study; history, philosophy, art, botany, mathematics and other topics that are useful to any person, especially a Witch. Most important is that you see how to apply what you learn to everyday life. Then, you can buy books on Wicca when you turn 18. This way you respect your parents wishes while staying true to yourself. After a time, speak to them again about your plans to study in the future. Make sure they understand your curiosity and that it comes from a place of reverence and spirituality, not selfishness or a silly lust for power. Your parents have probably heard many lies about Wiccans. Be patient with them. Don't keep secrets, that will only frighten and anger them. Be open and maybe one day they will understand. Good luck on your path.

Answer 4

I would do the research about the religion before you decide to jump right into it. Wicca is an alternative "religion" and not all accept it. Some practice in secret, some openly.
What i would do is try and ask your Dad what his reasons are for him not wanting you to broaden your mind and learn about different religions. If he doesn't like it because he feels it is "occult" or a "cult" tell him not to fear. It is not. Wicca is about balance and personal spirituality. It's not evil. There is no "devil" to worship.
Legally, if your parents do not want to allow you to read those books or practice Wicca, they are allowed to do so.
They can't change your beliefs if you don't let them.
Try to talk it over with them. My parents were the exact same way. Do your research. TACTFULLY try and get them open to it. Do not argue or do anything stupid, as it won't help.
If they aren't open to it. Wait it out and get the information elsewhere. No harm was done by gathering information about all religions so you can know where you stand.

Answer 5

Check out some books at the library. Them thinking it's not a good idea is likely due to misconceptions they have about the religion. I think you should learn what you can, and then educate them. That's what I had to do with my parents. When I was exploring paganism in my teens they immediately thought I was worshiping the devil. I had to nip that in the butt right away. And while I'm not sure my mom gets it (even 23 years later) I think most of my family members have a better idea of my religion due to me educating them by answering questions.

Answer 6

If you are underage you will need to listen to your parents. You can look up stuff on-line and get books from the library. If your dad is agnostic then he should be more willing to let you explore your spirituality. If your mom want talk about it then ask your father to speak to her.

Usually responses, like those of your mom's, stem from fear.

As to all those fear mongers telling you all the bad stuff about Wicca, ignore them. They speak of things they don't know. Though you should try and listen to your parents. They are responsible for you until you become of age or move out.

Good luck on your search.

Answer 7

Just curious, but what made you choose Wicca? That isn't a very common religion for young people to even know about, much less want to become. So, do you mind sharing a little about how you came to discover Wicca and want to become Wiccan? If you can explain it to us, it may help you discuss it with your parents as well.

Answer 8

Make sure your sources are historically accurate.

Wiccans are renowned for poor scholarship.

So, once you get the parental problem dealt with, once you start reading about it, make sure the authors you read have some kind of degree from a real university. Stay away from Silver Ravenwolf.

Oh, and contact your local Unitarian Universalist church/fellowship. Many UU churches have a pagan networking group there. If they have one you can meet some pagans there.

Then, you can tell your mom you're going to a new church.

Answer 9

Tell your parents that you want to respect their wishes (which you should do anyway, especially if you're a minor) but you'd like to enroll in a Comparative Religion course to help satisfy your curiosity about other religious beliefs and practices.

If they won't go for that, then you're stuck with reading up on the subject in your spare time.

Answer 10

If you are under the age of majority and living under your parents' roof, I'm afraid that what they say goes. No responsible Wiccan will help you to train behind their backs.

Here is a website that will give you good information, including reviews of books:

http://wicca.timerift.net

It's also a resource to direct your parents to if you want to educate them more about the Wiccan religion.

Best of luck to you on your path.

EDITED TO ADD: And I'm saddened to see the amount of name-calling that's going on in some of the answers to your question. Saddened, but even more sadly, not very surprised.