Advice for a girl who has nothing?

Question

I am a 24 year old female. I dont see my parents or any of the adults in my family. I have no one to go to if things go wrong. I was close to my ex but we are not close anymore.

I am scared and feel alone. I feel insecure about my life and i want some security. I will have a degree in a year but my job wont be very well paid.

What should i do to survive on my own? I dont feel safe being all on my own and think i need to find some security.

I am seriously thinking about finding a guy who is a bit older than me who can take care of me financially so i can be comfortable and follow my dreams. By a bit older I mean 30.

How can i build my life up from nothing?

Answer 1

Hello,
You have a lot of things my dear. You are educated, you are about to get a degree, you have the maturity and life experience of a 24 long years. And you are very young, energetic and have a long long life ahead to achieve so many things!!!
You are capable and so rich with all these. :-)
I agree having no parents, or no adults in family can be a problem sometime, but, that is the state you are in, let us accept it.
Count your blessings.. You have good health, you are young, can fight a tough battle anytime; you are learned and have a degree soon, you can write, read, converse, impress others; you dont seem to have any debt, so you can build your future with whatever money you make; you dont have to stick to one location, you can travel anywhere; you are currently unattached, you can get a nice guy soon; you had a bf, so you are attractive and desirable. You are a most eligible young and beautiful single girl!!!
Is that all a lot honey?
Make sure you dont fall into relation with any kind of guy. Choose well, make sure the guy you choose have the ability to take care of your feelings and you love you for what you are. Go slow, dont behave as if you are hard pressed to have a guardian.
You will do well. I am sure. Take care, All the best.
Wish You A Very Happy New Year!!!

Answer 2

First it's not that you have nothing!!!!!! And your not the type to use a man....... Women that do that end up hurt you only have a year or so to go you will make it becase you have to.
your attitude isn't very good right now, any way men are having trouble making it now, Jobs are not paying enough in America any more I worked from 6AM TO 2 PM THAT'S EIGHT hours on christmas then went back the same day from 6pm to 6am that's twenty hours in one day.... I got 2 hours sleep so that's 22 hours used up and it only leaves' 2 more hours and that makes' 24 hours I'm a man I am 48 years old and you think a man 30 years old is going to be able to pay some bills for you I wouldn't count on it AS I am a single man no children and I had to work 20 hours just to keep up with my bills This should tell you that you'll be working some 12 hour days yourself.. Life isn't for the weak at heart.
If you don't do it yourself you won't have any bragging rights you will be a fine young lady keep up the hard work yeah its hard but it will make you fight twice as hard take care dear...

Answer 3

You're so young, and have so much life ahead of you. You definitely don't need a guy to make you secure. If you're about to get a degree you've obviously got some intelligence, and that means you can build a successful career. Loneliness sucks, and it sounds like you need to make some friends which can be hard. Get into something you like for a hobby, join a study group, or have some conversations with fellow students. Sounds like some self esteem classes might help too. If you go looking for a guy to give you security at this stage of your life you'll be miserable in a decade. Stay positive, and focus on the positives in your life, as hard as that might be.

Answer 4

Not a good idea. Even if you did hook up with this fantasy guy you will still feel insecure. You need to sort yourself out first before you can get into a worth while relationship. By saying should you go out with and older guy so he can look after you, it makes you sound superficial. Look at what you're studying and see why you're not enjoying it. Write down the things you don't like about your life and then write next to them what you could do to change them. You need to be independant first.

Answer 5

You'd be crazy if you didnt have those fears, but just remember, its not abnormal and you're not alone. Just keep doing what you're doing. Keep yourself presentable, attractive and eventuall you'll meet someone. Wait for the spring, thats usually when things get cranking. Make friends to call if you need an emergency ride or something. You'll be okay. Try a dating site if you need to meet a guy. Follow all the rules of common-sense. I know a lot of people who have met on those things. Don't get a dozen cats and develop a drinking or drug problem! Getting a dog might not be a bad idea, for protection AND companionship.

Answer 6

Yes, you can build your life alone then find someone, it'll be a whole lot better that way otherwise you'll seem desperate. Get your act together and you'll create a value of yourself because who wants someone that's worthless, not that you are it just takes time. Trust your heart, just don't let it get hurt. Yes, it is nice to have someone in your life to share with but that requires much compromise, can you afford this while you're in school? Time is your best buddy here, confidence in oneself is self worth that has no equal. Be patient with yourself, all will follow.
Wish you enough, Steve
PS: We are the culmination of our choices, make good ones & you will never regret.

Answer 7

In this day and age you have to be secure in yourself and in your job in my moms day its was different guys are no longer accepting that women want to be taken care of you need counseling and you need to be more social because how are you going to meet mr right if you close yourself off theres nothing wrong with wanting to find someone to marry and not be alone but dont choose the first one and take your time you are still young

Answer 8

If you want to rely on a guy, if I were you, I wouldn't go for the very rich guy. It's okay if he has enough money to support both of you, but I really do think the size of his heart is more important than the size of his wallet, right?
If you married a guy that was 30, and very rich, and he would always hit you, or he couldn't give you a warm feeling being with him, would you want that guy? Would you still be married to him if that happened, or would you divorce and find someone who is okay with money, but the size of his heart is enormous?
I'm really sorry if I made you mad, but I'm just telling you to not make this mistake. There's a lot of people in my country that are like this, and they get to marry the rich guy, but later on, they become depressed and end up killing themselves because their husband doesn't love them with all his heart.
I don't want you to be one of those greedy women.
If you wanna experience it and learn from it, that's fine, but as long as you don't become depressed, I'm not against marrying the rich guy.

Sincerely,
12 year old Qistina

Answer 9

Hey, I want you to look at what you have, you said your gonna get a degree, but it wont pay much, well...even so, it's a degree. There's someone out there for you, I don't know you, but I can promise. Just take it cool, don't panic, live life right now, and just look. Do you still care for your ex? If so, contact him, see what's up, and take it from there. Think positive all the time, it's gonna be fine. My email is [e-mail] if you want to talk. Your problem just stands out to me for some reason, and I really want to help.

--DJ

Answer 10

Yech....so you're talking about selling yourself to an older guy? Be sure and show him this post so he realizes that you want a guy with a big...bank account.

How about keeping your needs lean, finishing your degree, and slowly broadening your lifestyle?

Me, I joined the military at 18 and served 20 years then retired. But then, marrying a 30 year old guy to "take care of me financially" wasn't on the possibilities list for me.