I need to vent. Boyfriend.. can't handle his alcohol and it's so irritating..AH?!?

Question

He drinks.
Once or twice a week.
Every time he drinks = shitfaced.
Acts like suchhhhhh a dumbass.. I can't handle him at all, leaning all over me, slurring everything.
And wonders why I get mad.
What the hell.
Yeah, I'm not mad when I'm drunk with him, but fro one, I barely ever am or have the desire to, and 2) I can handle my alcohol and limit myself.
I love him. It's so depressing. I'm always upset. I hate this so much.

Answer 1

The worst part is that he'll get worse. He'll start drinking more and more often over time. It might take years, but eventually he could be drinking all day.

Answer 2

You think that you're depressed now, just wait as the monster beast is only beginning to emerge. The guy has a bad problem and if you think that your love for him is going to help you, you're in for a shocking awakening. He is in a downward spiral in which you are being taken along. The guy needs help now where all that your love is doing is enabling him to keep right on drinking and preventing him from getting that help. The last line of your posting says it all- ( I love him, it's so depressing, I'm always upset, I hate this so much)- and you should read it over back to yourself very carefully. This will be your epitaph to a life with someone who is quickly becoming a hopeless alcoholic and if you don't find a way to end this madness you'll become lost right along with him. Your anger and frustration is eating you alive and starting to wear you down so it's time to wake up! This is serious business that ruins countless lives and if he won't get the help that is readily available, then you need to get away from him and stop your life from being destroyed. Even if you can control your drinking, it wouldn't hurt you one bit to attend a support group, even if he goes or not. You will at least have the strength of others who are in the same situation as you are and most of all you won't have to endure being alone with this. All the venting in the world won't help. Time to take action NOW!

Answer 3

*****Do you think he needs help to quit? If so, all you can do is suggest it, and tell him he must get help to stop, or you can't be around him anymore. If you think it's a social thing, and he's not "addicted" then telling him how upset you are about his ''stupidity", should be enough to get him to cut back. If that isn't enough the only thing you can do is to stay completely away from him when he starts drinking. Tell him you respect him enough to give him his freedom to drink, and act as he chooses, and you would like the same respect. Tell him when he does his thing, then your going to do yours. Go to a friends house maybe, or tell him to stay at a friends. Tell him the "girls" are having a sleepover or something. Tell him you love him, but you just don't like him when he gets drunk. One thing that would help is to set up a video camera, where he is unaware of it, and record him getting drunk. Get all the worst possible things he does while wasted on film, and when he's sober, sit him down and show him. He most likely has no idea he is acting the way he is, and probably thinks you are overreacting. If he see's how stupid he is being, he might want to fix it. If one of his close friends feels the way you do, or see's how he treats you, you can ask him also to talk to him, and give him advice. Coming from an outside force, that agrees with you, and is his friend, will make a big impression on him... Good Luck.. (Just don't give in, and put up with it. It will only get worse, if you don't do something now)

Answer 4

Talk to him about it. Be compassionate and don't accuse him or yell at him when you do. Just tell him that you really enjoy being around him and you really do love him. Just tell him it's becoming difficult to deal with and it's a real downer when he gets too drunk like that. Explain yourself to him. Tell him youd prefer it if he could try to limit his drinking to not every week. Explain to him that it's not even so much the drinking but the fact that he gets so drunk EVERY TIME and that puts you in a tough spot because you're the one who has to take care of him.

He'll probably get a little embarrassed and upset, but it's one of those things you don't want going in the other direction. It will also really help your cause if you can find one of his friends that agrees with you. Especially if you can convince his friend to bring it up to him and have the conversation with you.

Answer 5

Tell him how you feel and see if he makes an effort to control it. If he does not, there is a possibility that he is an alcoholic, and may not be able to control himself once he gets that first drink in him. In that case, he must want to get help for himself, or helping will not work. You could try to help him, until you are blue in the face, without success. Leaving him should then be your priority. Living with an alcoholic is a miserable life.

Answer 6

im sorry to say this but you have to leave him because right now hes just leaning on u and sluring but wait till one day you push him off wen you get mad his temper will get the best of him its no fun being with a drunk preaty soon his whole income will be wasted on drinks n will get mad at sum1 when he dosent have any more drinks and that sum1 will be you if you dont go now and if you dont listen this at least try n get him help but first you should ealy sit down with him when he is "sober" and tell him how it makes you feel when he drinks around you and if that dosent work try n get him that help just think wat if you guys have a kid you dont want them growing up in a family of abuse it will break their childhood think of what will happen in the futer for you guys have the talk n if that dosent work out consider ditching him for sum1 who can really treat you like the woman you are don settel for less

Answer 7

Have you told him his drinking upsets you? Talk with him. I wouldn't like to be in a relationship where I'm always worrying about his health, and upset. Take a stand.

Answer 8

Um...well if he keeps drinking, I would just break up with him if I was you. Move on, and find someone else, that doesn't drink.

Answer 9

Please do yourself a favor and get some space from him to clear your mind. Tell him he has to clean up and limit himself or else you are going to leave him, plain and simple.

Answer 10

hey nah i was the same...
i act lyk a dikhead...n i wonderd why she went cold
then one day i had the shits wit sumone else and told her to ef off... she got mad cut. i cried n lookd lyk a tool...

so i dont touch the stuff n if i do its only one...
so he needs to kno wat a tool he is...and if he dont clean it up a little, hes gone...
but dont restrict him cos he mite go behind ur back...