Help!!!..Ive lied to my boyfriend about my age when we first met...?

Question

Can someone PLEASE me some advice on how to tell my boyfriend that I lied about my age.....

He's 24..going on 25 in May...
I'm 18..going on 19 in September.....

I told him that I was 20........

The only reason why I lied was because I didn't think he would talk to an 18 year old..and him being 24...already out of highschool,college...and with a career....
while myself....I just started college for Aeronautical Engineering...I know that's good but I didnt think he'd want someone this much younger than him

I know it was Very dumb...and pointless of me to do....

But now I need advice on HOW TO BRING IT TO HIM..HOW DO I EXPLAIN...I know JUST TELL THE TRUTH..BUT HOW...

He's the PERFECT MAN.....and I really dont want to do and I REALLY dont want to lose him.....I know he's gonna be hurt and very upset when I do tell him...But what do I say afterwards..What if me just wants to leave and go somewhere ...Do I stop him...
Please Help.....

Answer 1

It wasn't pointless.

You really cared for him and your fear was a couple of years (OK, 6) would scare him away.

Then you sit him down and explain why you did what you did

Answer 2

wow friend thats a lot to handle. The big thing i think he will have problems with is the trust and communication. Since those are the basis for a relationship and you havnt really used them well it might be hard for him. however, he is older and more mature than guys our age (aka 19) but atleast you didnt say you were 21 or what not. The key point is you have to tell him that and it looks like you already know that. I dont think he will have any problem with your age being that it is only a 1 to 2 year difference...but...you have to tell him in the right way. Now you know him way better than i do so youll have to judge wether this helps you or not... if it were my boyfriend i would find out how he feels about you. Then youll know better whether he will want to keep the relationship. If he loves you then i dont think you will need to panic. Is the the type to leave? idk, but i would start by telling him how you feel and the stuff you feel is important to a relationship, then i would tell him that you lied to him. The thoughts that might begoing through is head might be worse than what it is..lol and then you should just tell him. Tell him the reason why you did what you did and you want to fix it. He'll be upset but you want him to know that you know what you did and feel bad for it. Thats all you can do then

if he leaves you need to let him go...i mean do you really want a man who would leave you and not work it out? you want someone who will stay with you and talk to you. When you get married you dont want a husband to leave during fights because hes upset.

Your gonna let him down and hes going to do the same but its that fact that you talk about it and learn from that makes the relationship. Hope this helps and dont worry if yall break up know that there is someone else out there for ya!!!

Answer 3

I did that too! It was only a year, off though, so I didn't have much a problem. I basically rounded it off... I waited till my next birthday and when that came, I just didn't tell him it was my birthday, and it was no longer a lie! :D he wasn't really my boyfriend... but anywho! Yours is a different situation.. I think the best thing to do would be to tell him the truth, and if there's enough love between the two of you, a stupid number should mean next to nothing! Besides, I don't think age means a whole lot most of the time... it's not like a level of your wisdom or experience, it's just basically how long it's been since your first breath! Big whooooop... lol. But yeah, just don't worry about it, and if it does matter a whole lot, he'll get over it, because it's just like, 6 years in between you two, as opposed to like, 40 between some weirdys... lol but just be like, "There's something you need to know that I probably should have told you when we first met, but I didn't figure it a huge deal until I found out how much you mean to me, and so it's something you should know, but it shouldn't affect a whole lot, and I hope you can understand the situation I was in.." or something like that, just wing it y'know, and hopefully you two can talk it out! I hope you the best of luck! =)

~Jas

Answer 4

Come clean .. the sooner, the better.

Fnd a time when it is just the 2 of you. Let him know you have something to tell him. If you can't say the words, just hand him your driver's license or birth certificate. Tell him exactly what you just told us ... why you lied, that you are sorry, you don't want to lose him.

He might laugh and say it doesn't matter. Or he might feel ebtrayed and leave. Either way, he will find out eventually whether you tell him or not. If he really is 'the one' you can't build your entire relationship on a lie. Unless you are planning on lying about your age for the rest of your life. That wouldn't feel good, I'm sure.

Answer 5

wow...well from this point on, honesty is the best way to go in any situation and i know that it sucks right now because you probably wish so badly that you could take it back and i can relate to that feeling...well i would definintely tell him..anyway, here are my thoughts: its not too big of a deal because you only added a year its not like you were 13 saying you were 16, tell him in a situation that isnt awkward, for example somewhere where if he wanted to leave or you wanted to leave you could do that, like tell him that you want to go get coffee and talk, if he is mad then its a lesson learned unfortunately, if he doesnt get mad then let him know that you know what you did was wrong and you will make every effort to be honest with him in the future...he may also be angry in the beginning so give him space and if he wants to talk then he will contact you...good luck

Answer 6

You need to tell him the truth . If he is the perfect man , then he doesn't deserve to be lied to . Explain to him why you did what you did . You may be surprised to where he'll forgive you . And want to stay with you . You don't want this in your relationship . Keeping secrets , lying . What if the shoe was on the other foot ? Just tell him the truth . And pray for the best . Good luck

Answer 7

k i have personal experience points on this one cause my gf is younger then me and she said the exact same thing " i didn't think you would be int rested in a girl so young" but here's the thing about men we don't care about age (excluding illegal age limits and so forth) 18 and 25 either way your both adults. the fact that you lied about your age was dishonest, but i believe the ends justifies the means what if you didn't lie about your age and the two of you never ended up together just come right out and tell him and use this excuse to back you up say " look, i know it was wrong of me to lie about my age but you seemed so perfect i couldn't mess it up, and i figured the age wouldn't matter if we fell in love so i thought i should wait to tell you" admitting a is never easy but it's not like your coming forward to tell him you cheated or did something terrible. men love loyalty so just assure him that you'd do anything for him and that he's the man of your dreams yada yada , then tell him after he's all butte rd up. hope this helps:)

Answer 8

Just start by telling him you did a very silly thing and you wish you could take it back...

Let him know you told this lie when you first met.. have never lied to him since.. and that you wish you had known how much you were going to fall for him, because you never would have risked this great relationship by lying about something so trivial.

Good luck. You are right in fessing up sooner than later.

Answer 9

Something similar happened to me, although it was unrelated to my age. It started as a misunderstood joke that I didn't straighten out. I realized how stupid I had been not to tell him I had been joking when he brought it up in a conversation. Later he mentioned it again in someone elses presence and I wanted to die of embarassment. It was still a few weeks later that I got up the nerve to tell him. He said it was ok, and that he should have realized I had been joking. But I wish I had righted the wrong as soon as I knew what had happened. Tell him now, and just admit you were afraid he would think you were too young to date and leave it at that. Make it casual, as if you don't expect him to care, not like a guilt ridden confession.

Answer 10

You lied. If he leaves you, it's your fault.. because you lied. You can beg him to forgive you, but it's up to him. You'll always be a liar and you'll have to live with the fact that you lied that WHOLE TIME, so it's better to tell him the truth.. unless you have a merciless conscience.. Tell him. I hate liars too. And I wouldn't blame him if he did get pissed off. Just tell him. If you really loved him, then you wouldn't lie to him.

Answer 11

Dar your age is not in question at this point so why bring it up. When it comes up then tell him, I'm only 19 now, not 20, and smile. you don't have to say you lied, your telling him you did and he will know it and look back and smile too.

Men like lady's for lady's and sluts for sluts. He got a lady, and age is not the issue, and if your a lady now and a women to him later, them he will know it didn't matter.
johnny