Your favorite age spacing of children?

Question

How far apart did you space your children? What was your favorite? 1 year apart? 2 years apart? Pros and cons of it? .... I've had kids 12 months apart and 2 months apart. But never more than that. I would love to hear from you. :o)

Note: Please no family haters here or pessimists. Only talking to moms and dads here. Thank you. :P

My kids ages.
7,6,4,2, and 3 months. 3 boys and 2 girls.

Answer 1

Freud's ideal was two years, and I think I agree with that spacing. Any more than 4 years really separates the children.

Answer 2

My first two kids were 5 years apart, and I would have to disagree with what some other people are saying about the children being too spaced apart... my kids are very close and the nice thing about the spacing of it was that my son was old enough to really participate in being an older brother, there wasn't the jealousy, i didn't have two kids in diapers at the same time... there are a million reasons why I liked spacing them apart that far. Now, my third baby (due in 4 weeks) will be 2 1/2 years apart from the second one, so we'll see how that goes.

Answer 3

My first and second child were spaced 8 yrs apart; my youngest were spaced 3 years apart.

I have also been a nanny to boys spaced 18 months apart to the day (I was the nanny before the second boy was born until they were both in school).

I see advantages to all.

For the 18 month old boys, they were practically raised as twins-- they were always into the same things, playing with the same toys or joining the same activities. They kept each other occupied nicely.

For my two youngest who are nearly 3 years apart, it worked out well, too-- they are close, but there is a little break between the stages in life.

For my oldest who I had 8 years before her first brother, well, that worked out for us too. I completed college in those years and it was easier to just take care of one child. When her brothers were born, she was older and very excited, she was a big help with them and very much took on the role of "2nd mother" which, at 17, she retains to this day.

Basically, having kids is such a blessing, I just see no disadvantages to any way they are spaced.

Answer 4

My step-sons are 4.5 years apart. they are (just) 8 and 12. Because I wasn't around when they were little, I don't know how their mother coped or anything like that.
I do know now, after 2 years that the age gap is a little big. They don't enjoy doing the same things, and the differences in their maturity levels is phenominal. The younger one gets hurt all the time and the older one is always getting told off for hurting him.
One likes lego and play-gyms, and the other one is only interested in video games. It's really hard to balance activities for them both to be involved in.
As for the bonding that someone else mentioned, they both loathe their mother as she has no time for them, and favours the younger one over the older one. To the point where they have said they don't want to live with her anymore.
Their bond with their dad and I is great though, and they live with us most of the time. We do have a daughter on the way any day now, so that's also going to be a big age gap.

Hope this sort of answers your question

Answer 5

My sister and I are six and a half years apart and it's too much. We were always at different stages in our lives. Do you know how hard it was to be at that awkward stage between childhood and puberty when she was a cute little baby? It sucked. I was the big, clumsy kid and she was their little miracle.

Then when she was a hot mess in middle school, I was graduating and going to college. The tables turned.

Now, we're both at the same place (done with school, in the same profession) and we can get along. It took years and years.

I will not space my kids more than 4 years apart if I can help it.

Answer 6

Mine are 19 months apart. I only have two sons but I think it would be better to have more space between them. For them, it's nice to be so close because they are like best friends. For me, I feel that the parent-child bond would be stronger if they had not been so close together. They are teenagers now and are still very close, but not like they were when they were younger. Now, I make sure to spend 1:1 time with each of them individually sometimes.

Also, with my second pregnancy, I started at 103 pounds and I had a lot of trouble gaining weight. I even had to go on bedrest for the the last 3 months, which was very difficult because my first was still a baby and needed me. I think my body needed more time between pregnancies.

Answer 7

I know you said only moms and dads, but I'd like to give you my opinion as a sibling. My little sister and I are 4 years apart and I thought it was great! My mom loved it because I could help a little and she didn't have two in diapers. My sister and I both liked it because in school there was enough space that you had your own identity... neither of us was ever known as "So'and'so's sister." She is now my best friend and best of all, you don't have two kids in college at the same time! (Oh and I'm also going to help out my parents with my sister's wedding!)

Answer 8

I have a son aged 2 years 6 months, he likes loads of animals and I couldn't pin down just one favourite but here's a few.... Frog, Tiger, Monkey, Duck, Hippo, squirrel. I think what your doing is fantastic and the kids will be very grateful!!

Answer 9

well my parents had 4 children and adopted 2. it so happens all of us but one were age difference of two years apart.

Answer 10

Dear Miss
I would have to say no more then 2-4 years a part OK Just as long as they are very healthy and loved is all that matters OK this is what it means to me I hope this help answer your question OK