Do you think parental control is fair for grown children as long as they are still dependent on their parents?

Question

I am wondering if generally, parental control is fair to be imposed on grown children of legal age as long as they are still dependent on their parents financially.I'm miserable that my parents are this way.I'm almost 28 years old,however,I still can't be financially independent from my parents until now,and depends on them financially on almost all of my needs and wants as of the moment.My"sort-of" previous relationships didn't work out mainly because my parents have been bestowing strong parental control over my life and didn't approve of those guys that I almost got into a relationship with. I didn't have a choice but to obey my parents since they want me to, otherwise I would have been left with no financial support from them. It seems to me that my parents want me to do certain things that I don't like,and which will be not morally and/or legally wrong if I don't do them.They just want me to do these things because they just think that I'll lead a much better life if I do them.

Answer 1

if you want to live your own life then you had better get out of your parents home, and if you have to work 3 jobs to do it than that is what you do and until then you follow the rules that they set up and that is just to bad if you don't like it something is wrong if you are 28 and are still dependant on your folks for your livelyhood,

Answer 2

I am a strong believer of the Golden Rule: "He who makes the gold, makes the rules." In other words, their house, their rules.

I have a 19 year old daughter living with us. It's her last year of high school. She questioned some of our rules since she is an adult. I explained this by the above statement, and added this analogy. She does not allow smoking in her car. I asked her how she would feel if an adult friend was in her car and lit up. She said she wouldn't like it. I said, "What if the person said they were an adult, and they should be allowed to smoke wherever they desire?" Point was made even though she didn't like it.

I would think about moving out. If you can't live on your own, how about sharing expenses with a friend?

Answer 3

Sit down and try to compromise with them. You are dependent on them financially, but you are also a legal adult. Your parents sound like they might be taking the control a little to far. I mean, interferring with relationships? Have you discussed your concerns with them? They might be more understanding then you think.

Answer 4

You are counting on your parents for money so one way of looking at it is that you have traded the right to make your own decisions for money. It's not right or wrong, it's just how it is.

As for it being fair, of course it's fair otherwise you wouldn't agree to it.

Answer 5

If you are really 28, you should not be living at home. you should be able to support yourself. If you still want to be a baby and live at home then your parents have a right to treat you as such.

Answer 6

You need to state Why at 28 your are not financially self supporting.