Please don't mention medication because we have elected not to go that route. Both my sons father and my brother also have adhd and medication gave them more problems than they fixed.
My son is extremely intelligent and I know that is why he gets depressed a lot of the time. Sometimes it is for selfish reasons such as cleaning his room and feeling hopeless to clean up such a huge mess all on his own. He's had bouts of depression like that since he was 3. More recently however, he has been depressed over friendship issues at school. Mostly he keeps his feelings bottled up until he explodes and then he tells me about his problems. He had an issue with a boy at school and kept it to himself for weeks until he felt like the world was coming down around him. He wrote me a letter telling me how his life is ruined and I was the only hope of fixing it. I talked with his teacher and fixed it but she also let me know that he hasn't been the same ( he broke both of his arms in
2007-12-25 12:59:55 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
September and he got a lot of attention when he had his casts on) since his casts came off. She said he seemed rather depressed for months. Just a couple of days ago he was the student of the week and his teacher gave him a questionaire to fill out and one of the questions was what do you wish for. His answer was for his life to be easier than it is. I asked him how to make it easier and he wouldn't answer me. He is an only child and we come from a well to do family. I'm a stay at home mom to devote a lot of time and love to him when he isn't at school. I'm at a loss at how to help him during his depressive bouts. Mostly because he won't tell me what is wrong. I'm scared because a lot of these feelings he has children don't usually display until they are in junior high. Is there anything can do to get him to open up?
2007-12-25 13:03:46 · update #1
Ok I'll say this again...We are not medicating our child. Studies have shown that children who are medicated early for adhd become severe drug addicts later on.
2007-12-25 13:21:43 · update #2
Maybe the kid isn't speaking to you because he has a Choice NOT to...
Ever thought about that?
Look, I stopped attending school 2 years ago because of my own bout with Depression...
I was put into the "Home bound" program.
It's basically Home Schooling for kids who (for whatever reason) can't make it to public school.
I was suppose to go back after a few months.
It didn't happend.
Then I was supposed to go back in the beginning of this year.
It didn't happend...
I'm a senior... and now that the year is already almost Halfway over, NOW is when I've decided to go back... -__-
Ugh
Why? Well because everyone was too consoling.
Nobody wanted to "kick a person while they're down" so they just let me be. They just said I could do what I want...
(As long as it was to "get better".)
They put the ball in my court..
Trouble was, I didn't know what to do with it!
So I did nothing...
Instead my goal was to ignore the pink elephant in the room for as long as possible.
To forget I was lonely.
To forget I was going nowhere.
To forget I was doing nothing.
I didn't think about the future.
Only the past.
And the present? Forget about it.
It's always went up in smoke.
All I did was watch quality Television & play videogames.
Oh and surf the internet for hours...
So my answer to you is: Don't Cosole him.
Don't let him make the decisions.
I know that sounds crude, but trust me on this one.
He needs guidance, a backbone, a leader, a master.
Whatever.
The point is, he needs structure.
Everything else comes secound.
Get him a good therapist.
He won't want to stick with it.
Most people with issues don't...thats fine.
Stick with it though!
Eventually he'll confide in him/her and he'll stop Bottling up his emotions so damn much..
Anyway.
Remember.
Get rid of the distractions
Get a good therapist.
Stick with that person.
Oh yeah, and Ice-cream!
Treat him to some Ben & Jerrys.
Thats always good to lift ones spirits ;)
-----
I hope these people & I have helped at least to some degree.
I wish you & your son the best of luck.
And don't forget about Ice-cream...
2007-12-27 06:12:50 · answer #1 · answered by Andre 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not enroll him in an activity?
A friend of the family has a son with a really severe case of ADHD, she also refused to medicate her son, instead she changed his diet (almost no sugar, lots of fruit, veggies and carbs) and enrolled him in Tae Kwon Do. He made alot of friends and it really helped calm and center him.
If TKD isn't for your son, find something that is, preferably a sport that will get alot of the pent-up energy and frustration out. But get him into activities and around kids other than those at school.
Encourage him to talk, without nagging, be sneaky. Ask specific questions, especially about things he likes at school (for instance, if he loves history, ask him what he learned in class, etc.....) and work your way up from there.
2007-12-25 21:40:11 · answer #2 · answered by moddy almondy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to your local GP or Hospital - they should be able to refer you to a counsellor for him (specifically a COUNSELLOR who specialises in child psychology)
A counsellor (not a psychologist - they will "label" him and try and force medications on him) will help him talk through his problems. Also, counsellors do not have the authority to give out prescriptions and a lot of them do not believe in medications.
Also the counsellor might be able to refer you to prgrams he can do, such as "buddy programs". Generally what happens is, the child gets teamed up with another person (generally a young adult) who he can relate to and help talk through his problems with. Theres all sorts around, I volunteer at one for kids dealing with grief. Theres many different groups he can be a part of.
There will be not easy fix for this, and you'll have to be consistant with him.
I hope some of this helped, but feel free to email me, I'm more than happy to help.
And I agree with you, in my opinion medications should be a last resource. Although, don't completely rule them out - if after 6 or so months you're not getting anywhere with the counselling... But the counsellor and his doctor can figure that out.
2007-12-25 21:26:37 · answer #3 · answered by Trout Pout (Lollie) 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not rule out medication, they have better medication now then they had back in the day. If he is depressed at age 7 this is due to a chemical imbalance, he needs medication. That is the only way to comabt the imbalance.
2007-12-25 21:04:02 · answer #4 · answered by 2Cute2B4Got 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you made a wise decision about the medication my close friend took the medication and it made him get into more trouble than ever at school. now what i suggest you do is help put his energy into something he will need to challenge himself in this helps him build selfconfidense because he knows he knows how to do this thing he worked so hard at. The cough syrup has different affect on everyone tis could make him worse not his adhd but his ability to try to focus
2007-12-25 21:07:42 · answer #5 · answered by <3 TiNY<3 aSiAn cAllMe< 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Im not a mother (im not even driving yet) but, maybe set a time in the day when u and he can just play a game or watch a movie or even turn on some music and have clean up time! he might not like it at first but keep trying and he will loosen up! trust me, i use to get mad and feel unwanted when ever i was asked to do somthing(like dishes) when my sisters where playing a game or somthing. so just make sure that u spend time with him even when he dosnt want to!
lots of love,,
alyssa
2007-12-25 21:06:55 · answer #6 · answered by AngelRica 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You CANNOT rule out medication. Especially if your child started this at age 3. He has serious chemical imbalances and medications will be the only thing that can be done for him. You need to be taking him to his pediatrician ASAP and get him help.
2007-12-25 21:12:01 · answer #7 · answered by S P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep in mind i am no doctor, but I am a mother of a 7 year old daughter who I suspect to have the same issue. what works for me is keeping her busy.. at first its a fight to get her moving but once she does-- she thrives!! i put her in karate after a long time fighting to get her to participate-- i took along her friend and she joined just like that.. now she is upset if she misses her class. also if he likes to draw- liek mine then do something artistc like paint by number-- it takes intense consentration and keeps her mind off other things that bother her. the room thing-- well that is my deal to.its over whelming to clean the whole room so they get depressed and give up.. try breaking the room up into sections like.. first lets pick clothes up. next toys... next make bed. after each section offer him a water break.... id love to keep in touch with u if u want to talk, i am also trained to teach children with exceptionalities.. and i love it-- and stay away from the meds. ur totally right on this one!!
2007-12-25 21:11:10 · answer #8 · answered by Noor L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Herbal Life
2007-12-25 21:03:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
perhaps cough syrup and sleep would help.
2007-12-25 21:01:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋