Dear Muslims?

Question

I hope you can help me? :)

My parents never really taught us our deen. I have strong faith in Islam, but I feel I don't know too much about it! I LOVE Islam, yet I don't really practice. I feel lost. I have had no guidance from my family. I'm finding that I feel a lot of resentment towards my parents for not teaching us or atleast sending us to a school as kids. Now I'm seeing my brothers and their families fall apart and it's all from lack of Islam! I can't bear to watch it. There is always the option of seeking knowledge myself, and I do, but I just feel there's so much I've missed. I want to embrace Islam fully yet it seems near impossible with where I'm at in life and with my family and living in this awful place (UK).

I don't know what my question is. I just need some support, I think. How can I learn more? No matter how much I read I always feel I need more; I NEED to embrace it, I need to have a family that embraces it entirely. How can that ever happen? :S

I can't blame my parents too much. My mother was raised a Christian and not a very good one at that. She's quite uneducated. Our father instilled in us a real Love of Islam and the basic knowledge of it... but we don't embrace it as a family, and that is so important to me! He could have tried harder, but it was tough for him (many reasons). Despite all this I feel a lot of resentment! So I suppose that's also why I'm writing this... how can I get past this resentment?

Answer 1

I am so sorry to hear that. The best and simple advice I can give you about your situation is to gain knowledge of Islam through any way you can. It could be browsing online, reading books, hearing people tell you about it, whatever it may be. I'm pretty sure other brothers and sisters will answer your question thoroughly and precise. If that still doesn't help you feel free to e-mail me sister!

Hope it helped & good luck!

Answer 2

Sister,InshAllah Allah will like this intention of yours where you want to improve yourself. Alhumdulillah. Your father would be able to be with you although he isn't that strict but atleast being a muslim since his childhood, he can atleast understand.When you will die, you will be answering to Allah about yourself Alone. So Islam is something you need to practice for your own benefits, ignore what others might say or how would they response. Yahoo answers, we try our best to give the authentic references and answer all the possible questions as well as ask questions. You can do the same, start participating and start practicing. Your case is not the only one. There are cases where the whole family is not a practicing one but one girl practices Islam to her level best. You do the same.
One should atleast be able to offer 5 times salah, take care of your hijab and be good to others. avoid haram and no zina. we need to do far far better but atleast start with these where others are not involved yet~!

All the best and keep praying to Allah to make this journey easy for you. ameen ~! :)

Answer 3

Salam
First of all well done for bringing yourself to think about Islam. Usually people can't be bothered but you sound that you are determined to find out the truth.
Try going to a mousqe, and meeting new friends. I go to the mousqe on a Friday night where i meet friends (im 14 years old) but there are many other older and younger women, i also live in the UK and where i live is in a small village. In this tiny village we are the only muslims. When i go to the mousqe we just talk and catch up. I feel like a family, try going to your local mousqe and meeting new people.
What about talking to a member of your family who you could trust and talk to about your deen and Islam.
Also try reading books about Islam, ive got a couple of books about a Jewish women who converted to Islam she tells how she converted and i like reading books like that. Her name is Maryam Jameelah. Try reading other books find them in the mousqe libary or in your local libary!
Hope i helped
If you need any help write another question!!!
Peace upon you :)
Salam!

PS try turntoislam.com
i love wathing the videos lol

Answer 4

As-Salaam Aliakum!!

Your not the only one who has this problem...my husband has the same problem with himself and this causes you to feel inadequate or in-equipped to practice Islam...but the only advice I can offer is forget about trying to save your whole family and just save yourself...don't try and read every book that you come across. You have to apply Islam to your self and current situation and then work your way up to acquiring new knowledge...don't try and grasp new concepts if you haven't even mastered the ablution for prayer or saying AL-Fatiha. So don't be ashamed about this situation...okay I have been there and what I did was buy the books with the general information that teaches prayers, wudu, adthan, short suras, duas, and I also recently re-enrolled my self in Islamic Sunday classes at the masjid...to enhance my reading the Quran in Arabic, but with correct pronunciation rules to help me. Don't overdue it by setting high goals that you will give up on...start small with the basics....which your parents didn't have time to teach you...it's not too late!!!! Just do this for your self and ask Allah for help in this effort and you will not feel so lost as you are trying and that's all he wants from us!!!

Answer 5

There are a lot of Sunni and Sufi scholars either residing or regularly visits UK you won't be Islamically and Spiritually deprived.

Check the following trusted sites. The forums will give you updates on talks given.

Allahu Hafizh

Answer 6

I take things one step at a time. I never rush to learn everything at one go coz being human, i have many limitations. For each and everyday, I learn new things. I don't do praying but, i learn to take wudhu, remembering the steps and remembering the doa. When I am comfortable with the steps, I proceed to another increasing my knowledge and understanding of Islam. Afterall, Islam is submission to Allah and when I submit to Him, I want to submit willingly with an open heart.

Answer 7

i went through this phase. my parents are strong in their faith. but they were very lenient towards us after we became teenagers. when i was young i was very into it. i started hating it during early teens. then i met some people who abused the religion. then i came to the conclusion that if i need sanity, i need Allah. try to study the Holy Quran by yourself. also, get involve in youth groups in your masjid or try to find a young mullahs, and other muslim friends. fellowship with other muslims is very important in this stage. you should not force your family, b/c they won't see what you see. instead, you need to show them by your actions. you don't need to preach. you need to live the way the Holy Quran says and then people around you will start to see the change. they will be curious and they will want to embrace it too. salaam!

Answer 8

Asalam Alaikum my dear sister
Best thing for you to do is start studding and doing your best to learn the deen. Maybe even trying to guide your parents and siblings along with you.

Allah be with you sister. May He guide you in this wonderful deen. Ameen

Answer 9

Subhan Allah am new Muslim
I need somebody to help me too !
but you live in good situation CZ your family at least believe in same God and I don`t thick they kick you out CZ you convert to Islam !
so pray pray pray sister
and watch Peace TV I think it`s good for you to give you good info about Deen
with best regards
also if you are old enough try to find good Muslim man and get married from him CZ that will support you

Answer 10

AS salaamu 'alaikym warahmatullahi wabaraktuh, my dear sister.

Insha'Allah, perhaps you should begin to learn Islam as you would should be a revert to Islam.
What I am proposing is that you imagine yourself as someone to whom Islam is all knew, an unknown so that you are starting basically from scratch.

To begin, get a copy of the Holy Qur'an. If you can not read Arabic (as most reverts con not read Arabic when they originally revert), get a good translation in the language you are most comfortable with. Start with the first surah (al Fatiha) and read it surah by surah.

Next, go on line to one of the many excellent websites such as http://www.islamreligion.com, http://www.islamonline.com, http://www.sultan.com, http://www.alsunnah.com or one of the many, many others. Use "islam" as your search word.

Now, go to http://www.islamicfinder.org and find the mosque/masjid nearest to you and go talk to the imam about classes in the study of Islam for yourself and for your children.

Begin to pray each and every day. If you are not familiar with how to pray, go on line to amazon.com, or Barnes and Nobles, etc. and find a book such as "Salaat: The Islamic Prayer from A to Z" by Dr. Mamdouh N. Mohamed to help you learn how to pray. At http://www.islamreligion.com you can request a copy of the Holy Qur'an, books about Islam, its teachings and practices and a CD that will help you learn how to pray by watching and hearing salaah performed. They will send you this for free.

Be very open and honest with your family, especically your children. Explain to them what you are doing and why you are doing it and how important you feel that it is. You will find support that you did not think was there, insha'Allah.

With your larger family, become a "silent evangelist" for Isalm. Don't preach but teach by how you will be living Islam.

In case you are wondering, I have first hand experience in doing just what I have suggested that you do. I am an American, former Roman Catholic (who spent time in a relgious order studying for the priesthood), lweft and followed Buddhism and one day was led by Allah, Subhanna wa Ta'ala, to Islam where I have been ever since and, insha'Allah, will be until the day I leave this life! Alhumdulillah!

I am also a single father of a seven year old daughter whom I am teaching Islam to, insha'Allah.

Since we reverted, we have been disowned by my family, have faced discrimination at my former places of employment, in court cases regarding custody, have been shunned by former friends and co-workers, etc., but it has all been worth it! Reverting to Islam has been the best decision that I have ever made in my life. Alhumdulillah!

Submit to the Will of Allah, Subhanna wa Ta'ala, and trust completely in Him. He will sustain you and guide you to where He wants you to be, along with your family. It may not be easy. At times it may be down right uncomfortable however, it will all be the Will of Allah, Subhanna wa Ta'ala.

May Allah, Subhanna wa Ta'ala, guide you and your family on the straight path of Islam for your salvation and for the benefit of others.

My sister, you are in my prayers.

Ma'a salaam.

By the way, if you think England and the U.K. is bad, think how rough it can be in "Islamiphobic" America!