Im stuck in a hard place I grew up with my best friend and she has a brother, he found me over myspace and we been talking for two days now, talking abuot random thing's and stuff, when I first ever met him I thought he was so amazeing and he still is his sister is still a good friend of mine and she dont care if we go out or not, but my problem is my parents DO NOT approve of him Im 18 years old and he's now 28 I dont care for the age the age doesnt bother me at, he was once married, has 3 kids and that doesnt bug me either, I just feel something about this man i havent never felt about any other man.. what should I do?
2007-12-25 10:51:53 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I grew up with this man, and his two sisters, i know hes divorced and i know what hes like... h isnt that bad..
2007-12-25 11:01:23 · update #1
FORGET IT! He just looks good because you are desperate. If you got out more and met more guys then he wouldn't look so good.
2007-12-25 10:57:29 · answer #1 · answered by Fyre & Reign RETIRED 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know why your parents are concerned, it is not him it is that he has kids, and it would be an instant family, age is not the concern. This man comes with a lot of obligation you should not be part of right now. You are too young to mother, or be a partnere in such a large undertaking, even if he says you arent
What you need is to go to his house for the weekend, when his kids are there, and spend the entire, morning to night with them and him.... The first time you will see good behavior, the second you may see the truth, he is a father first. These kids are more important then you, and you would need to second seat until they are grown. That means 18 the same age you are now. It would not be he does not like you or you like him
He has been married,and has a family
You need to let the fantasy of him being your guy only dissolve and be honest, you deserve better for yourself
So you can be friends, just date other guys , since dating is when you meet the person, he is not him, you need to meet a lot of guys whether they are 18 or 23 or 28 has no bearing you should be the mothereto HIS children at your age not a STEP MOTHER. So please date, no sex, unless you can handle being a mother first and a wife second, if not pass on this one and move to a more suitable husband, that is what dating is.........
2007-12-25 19:04:25 · answer #2 · answered by Elizabeth D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your parents for the most part: wait it out. Theres a 10 year age difference there and even if you dont say it bothers you, it has a major impact on any relationship. I suggest you two get to be really good friends (not just over myspace) and date when the time is right. NOT when you just turned of legal age
2007-12-25 18:56:12 · answer #3 · answered by Dee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run. He's too old for you at the age of 18.... If you were 30 and he was 40 that would be different because as we mature the difference in age becomes less obvious but at 18 those 10 years are just too much. He's in a way different place in life than you are. You have yet to "live."
2007-12-25 18:54:59 · answer #4 · answered by singlegal 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you sound like a smart girl, but have you really thought this through? are you willing to share your man with 3 kids, if he is a good father(and iam sure that is what you would want in a man)3 kids take up a lot of time even if he only has them every other weekend, and remember if it comes down to the kids or you, who is he going to choose, i know that this doesn't sound good, but i just thought you might want some hard info, hope this is helpfull.
2007-12-25 19:04:18 · answer #5 · answered by Cooltime 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you are ready to be a mom - wow good for you!
I would have thought that someone at your age may still want to go out with friends and have fun instead of sitting home watching kids and tv. I didnt think you would want to get involved with having to take care of sick kids, help with homework, have to work to pay for school clothes or get into fights over his ex. I am sure though since you are younger that you probably wont mind his kids not listening to you and talking back to you.
For me I want someone closer to my age - I guess I am not as open as you - I still want to have fun, go out, travel, see places and do things. use my money for me and not kids that arent mine.
He is a package deal and you better think twice about what that means and dont kid yourself..
2007-12-25 19:00:02 · answer #6 · answered by sammy3256 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not the age that bothers me - but three kids makes him different to you. He's had a marriage and a family, so you, at 18 (and I presume unmarried n without kids) are too young for him. Take your parents advice.
2007-12-25 19:04:48 · answer #7 · answered by serf m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Age don't matter... But are you SURE he is divorced? and if so and you still want to try you are 18 there for can make your own decisions. Just tell your parents what you feel they should understand. GOOD LUCK
2007-12-25 18:57:21 · answer #8 · answered by Its Me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Getting involved with a divorced man who has 3 kids requires a great deal of maturity and responsibility because you don't need at your age. Although you love this guy please give yourself (and him) time to get to know each other better and you need to get to know his kids to see if they will respect and accept you or if they will totally reject you and make your life miserable. You would be in a relationship with this guy, his kids and his ex-wife so please proceed with caution and at a very slow and steady pace. Remember that old adage "Look before you leap!"
Take care and God bless.
2007-12-25 19:03:49 · answer #9 · answered by Bethany 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well seeing as your 18, meaning legal age, why not take a chance. What if he turns out to be the man of your dreams? I wouldn't want to sit around and wonder for the rest of my life. As long as he is good to you and his kids, family, etc... take a chance and see what could become of it. Best of luck to you hon!
2007-12-25 18:56:23 · answer #10 · answered by Nikki 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should follow your parents advice.. Your too young to become a part time mother..I know you might like him, but really think about it Are you ready to take on 3 children ? Honey your young, have your whole like ahead of you.. Trust me you will have feelings for other men just give youeself time and don't rush life...
2007-12-25 18:59:57 · answer #11 · answered by gina67000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋