me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 2 years...and we have been through a lot which has made us really close...and when i mean really close i mean we practically act like we are married...i know i love him and i know he loves me and he tells me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me all the time??? do a lot of guys know about promise rings?? y wouldnt he give me one yet??? is he just using me?
2007-12-25 08:03:28 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
i have another post but its a little more complicated i guess...my family does not approve of him...and the engagement ring question cam up a little bit ago...and i know i want to be with him but i dont think were ready for that yet...he said the way i get when i am upset worries him...but we both have things we need to work on...but i know if he asked me i would cuz we cant live without each other...i guess he just has more to think about
2007-12-25 08:17:58 · update #1
promise rings seem very juvenile, like something high schoolers would do and frankly high school is too young to be thinking about marriage anyway. so if you're in high school you should take time for yourself and be who you are.
2007-12-25 08:06:31 · answer #1 · answered by somebody's a mom!! 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Promise rings are for the immature and those who don't see it at what it really is: a marketing ploy. Just because he doesn't give you a promise ring doesn't mean he's using you. Millions of people had successful relationships and marriages without promise rings. When you're ready to get engaged and plan your marriage and wedding then get engaged. Otherwise, don't worry about a promise ring. Whenever I hear girls talk about their promise rings it becomes very evident to me that they are putting emphasis on some object and not the relationship. There is no rule that says you have to have a promise ring after the relationship gets to a certain point. They are a fairly new idea compared to the engagement ring and there is no specified time for getting one. He's not using you, he's just practical. Besides, after two years of your relationship you need to figure out where this is headed... you are right to consider marriage as something that needs a lot of thinking and shouldn't be rushed into but at this point a promise ring seems useless. You'll either get engaged soon or break up after awhile in which case the promise ring means nothing anyway.
2007-12-25 12:45:44 · answer #2 · answered by Rockit 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay, I'm in a similar position. My boyfriend and I will celebrate our 2 year marker next week. He just gave me a promise ring for Christmas. And I have to say, to all the woman who said it was childish - you guys suck and need to have a heart. Don't trample on the feelings and morals of others, just because you don't think it's good enough, of expensive enough. The point isn't how big the ring is!!! The point is, the guy you love openly made a commitment to you. It doesn't matter how long you've been together...if you feel it's an important thing to have, then don't let ANYONE tell you otherwise. My family didn't see the point of one either, until they saw how happy it made me! If you aren't to the jumping point of marriage, but you know you want to GET THERE TOGETHER...a promise ring is a great idea for the interim! At least you know that he means it enough to bother! It's the thought...not the price tag ladies!!!!
Honey, if you love this guy and you feel this is something worth asking for, then ask. If he doesn't see the point, let him know what the ring means to you and make it known to him that it doesn't have to be a diamond. Remember, a promise ring can be anything at all! Stand up for your feelings and talk to him.
As for your family. Thousands of men and women get hitched every day and live happily without their families approval. If your family loves you and you are (and I hope you are...) old enough to make a life long commitment - then they will just have to respects that fact. End of story. They can't live your life for you. But they will still be your family and love you no matter what.
Good luck honey and don't lose hope.
And remember "Love Is Like Mining for Diamonds: It Takes Work" ;-)
2007-12-27 08:58:51 · answer #3 · answered by B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After two years, if he is really serious and telling you he wants to spend the rest of his life with you (and depending upon your ages), he should be giving you more than a promise ring. Promise rings don't hold water in my book, it is like going steady when I was in High School, you can break up two minutes later.
However, I can tell you that if you push him, he will say he is not ready for a further commitment of any kind. So either wait him out, or lose him.
After reading your additional information, neither of you are ready for marriage. I also hate to say this, but your parents may have a point in that he is not the one for you. You have given two years to this guy and you still have things to work out, that is not a good outlook for the future of your relationship. As we used to say either poop or get off the pot because this relationship is going no where and I am sure your parents are hoping it will die out. Also if you are even asking if this guy is using you, you must have some doubts, so it is time to move on. You will find you can live without him and him without you.
2007-12-25 08:13:09 · answer #4 · answered by Diane B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two years... skip the promise ring. You need to talk to him about getting married. Promise rings are cute and appropriate at the 6-8 month mark in a relationship.
2007-12-25 08:10:30 · answer #5 · answered by Rhapsody616 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
A promise is given whilst somebody feels incredibly in love with you and desires to vow to never love yet another and easily cherish you. in case you experience you won't be able to try this, then it is relatively useful to think again your situation. additionally, a promise ring is the promise of a destiny engagement. actual, i think of promise jewelry are a waste of money, yet a minimum of he concept-approximately you.
2016-11-24 23:51:51 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do you say he is just using you? It sounds like he loves you been doesn't want to spend the money on a promise ring... wait for your engagment ring....
2007-12-25 08:06:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anna J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Promise rings are great. I would use one if I couldn't afford to give my girl the ring I know she DESERVED.
you're probably really lucky :)
2007-12-25 08:07:37 · answer #8 · answered by cowboydanimal 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He probably just wants to wait and give you the big one. Be patient, it will happen.
2007-12-25 08:08:07 · answer #9 · answered by shavon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it just didn't occur to him...guys can be clueless. Drop a hint or two next time...
2007-12-25 08:11:10 · answer #10 · answered by Mariah 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋