family advice on kicking someone out? please help?

Question

ok heres the thing i have family member that lives with me and all he everdoes is think my hubby is a free cab and eats the food doesnt clean upafter him self has disrespected me by callin me a ***** caus ei dont likehis sluty girlfriend talks **** about me and my man doesnt pay his rent half the time now he has caught herpies from his girl and it is contagise ihave a lil one and i really need to kick him out before she my husand or igets it none the less he is already bringing stolen **** in my house. whichcan get us in truble to but since it is christmas eve and right around theholidays me and my husband cant ring our self to kick him out cause wearent mean people i need advice what should i do

he is not my child i didnt raise him he is my cousin

Answer 1

There is no way around it. Your husband (because he is the head of the household) needs to have a calm, straight-forward conversation with this person and say, "Look, we've helped you out, but now it's time for you to move on".
So, you don't want to do it because of Christmas, well that will be over day after tomorrow, so talk to your husband and plan to do it the day after.
This person is obviously taking advantage of you and your husband, and if you've reached your limit, you don't need to feel bad or guilty about that.
Had he acted grateful and appreciative of your hospitality, then I'm sure, things would have been fine, but even if they had been fine, there would still be a time when he needed to be told you would like to live alone as a family without any extra people to support or deal with.
You can explain yourselves in a nice way, but still get the message across that he needs to make other living arrangements, as soon as possible.
JUST DO IT! And from now on, don't be so quick to try and "help" someone out, because as you can see, some people just don't appreciate it. Best wishes.

Answer 2

Lay down the law. If he refuses to respect you and your family he's out. If he refuses to leave, call the police. If he's bringing stolen merchandise into your home, call the police and turn him in. You've been putting up with his lack of respect for a while now, so a few more days won't hurt.

Talk to your husband, decide how you want your lives and your home environment to be and then take steps to make it that way. If your cousin cries that you're being mean or if other family members object to you kicking him out, remind him and them of how he has to take responsibility for his actions. You tried to help him and he took advantage.

Answer 3

when we let relatives live with us, we need to see ground rules, and limits BEFORE they ever step into the door... and the first time the relative steps out of line, well, he should be OUT of the house.

sounds like your cousin was trouble before you let him move in... what made you think his presence would make things better ???

you might want to try setting some personal boundaries for yourself. and if you do not know what they are, do a yahoo search for SETTING PERSONAL BOUNDARIES....

those of us who have limits and boundaries in our lives, normally don't end up in situations where others are using us or walking all over us.

i hope that you can work this out and the cousin can find his own place.

happy holidays

Answer 4

He is not respecting you or your home and family so why should you respect him. If he can't find the door show it to him and tell him not to let it hit him in the ***... Good bye good luck you war out your welcome here.

I wish you all the best, myself I have tried to help many like them out and they are just users, Don't put up with it for you have to think of the well being of your family, they must come first.

Merry Christmas

Dave R

PS.
You must think stolen goods in your house leaves you open for charges of possession of stolen goods, being its your house you are the one charged unless he will stand up and say it is his, Do you want to take the chance, I sure would not.

Answer 5

If it's been more then 30days him living there and has establish restendsy you have to get a court order effection. If its been less then 30 days just have a police officer come buy and trow his crap out on the streets

Answer 6

Gotta hate those free-loaders!
ok, I would suggest TALKING TO HIM! Tell him what's wrong, ask him to change and see what he does with it. If he does nothing, then kick him out! Tell him that you gave him a chance, he didn't take it, and that's the end!
If worse comes to worse, a restraining order is only $50 in most states.
Good luck!
Live. Laugh. Love. -Cutie

Answer 7

Give them a deadline of 2 weeks and kick them out, then. Or one week. They will continue to crap all over you as long as you let them. They don't care about you, so why should you worry about whether anyone thinks you are "mean"?

Answer 8

kick him out after christmas !
tell him to find a new home.
put him up for adoption.
don't worry, you won't regret it.
change the locks and put his stuff outside leaving him a nice note explaing why his stuff is outside and why he needs to move. get a restraining order. don't answer the phone, i.e. there's a thing called caller i.d.

Answer 9

i feel bad for you guys to have this moocher living with you,i'd be giving him a liitle bit of time to get his sh** together say two weeks max.make him leave at that point,let him no your not a hotel with free maid service.

Answer 10

damn girl..kick him out...if you rent...tell him it's against your lease to have people staying with you...it's YOUR HOME..don't let him run it..stop running him around etc..he can't make you guys do things for him...he won't move until someone gets a set of B****and tells him to GET OUT!! Do it b4 he stays 2 long..and you have to legally evict him...