Parents What Do You Think and What Would You Do?

Question

Wether you like it or not parents, almost half (47%) of the teens in the united states admits to having pre-marital sexual intercourse. You can look on yahoo answers and read all the questions from kids, a lot of whom are in middle school, and see how sexually advanced they are. Why do you think so manny middle schoolers/high schoolers are having sex as young as 12 and 13 years old? Thats just kind of schocking to me, Im only 18 and I remember back in middle school sex was the last thing I thought about, then again I went to a very small private school with about 20 kids in the whole school. I know a lot of parents are going to say, "Oh its not my child, she/he doesn't do those types of things", but if 47% of teenagers are doing it than more than likely some of you parents out there, your kids are having sex or some sort of sexual intercourse. I know it has a lot to do with environment and peers. In about 10-12 years I really want to have children but Im really afraid at the

way teenagers behave these days. I already know that if I have children, they are not riding the bus (i know what goes on the school bus), if i can afford there going to single-sex school (but if they're gay than im probably ******), there will only be one computer (which im taking the power cord too every night and when i leave the house), a 12:30am curfew, and no car until college. Will this even be enough, how do you parents deal with situations like this where you know at school your child is exposed to whatever their friends tell them? Is what i would do enough?

o yeah, i would also try to make it easy for them to talk to me and be open. Even though that is extremely hard.


Please try and keep the ****** comments to yourself.

okay maybe the whole no car untill college and the computer thing is a bit much. But seriously, besides being an understanding parent and not blowing up at them whenever they come to me with a problem, what is there to do?

Answer 1

My oldest is 11 years old. I think about situations like this all the time that he may get into. Right now his interest is in sports and not girls as much. But I think the best thing I can do is teach him right from wrong, teach him respect and responsibility and monitor the people he chooses to hang out with. There have been a couple I have not particularly liked and we have talked about it and why I think it is a bad idea to hang around with this person and what the consequences could be to him if he continues to hang out with them (not only would he be in trouble from us, but he could end up in trouble with other people in the neighborhood or community or worse the police). In the end he did see what a bad kid this person was and no longer hangs out with him. I would hope that we have an open enough relationship that he can come to us NO MATTER what. I want to encourage him to ask questions no matter how tough or uncomfortable they may be. I know that some of these tough questions may be going to his friends and that is why we monitor the friends. I am sacred for him and all of my kids, but the best thing I can do for them is give them knowledge, faith and the conscience to make the right decision.

Answer 2

I completely understand your fear. I have a three year old and I am deathly afraid of the day she comes to me, 16 years old and says shes pregnant. My parents tried to very strict and overprotective, because of this my twin sister rebelled. She got pregnant when she was 15 and had her baby when she was 16. So it takes more than communication. And trying to keep your child away from others of the opposite sex, and keep him/her sheltered will only make them want to rebel. Some parents know there daughters are engaging in sexual intercourse, so in an effort to stop the teen pregnancy, they put the child on birth control. But I do not believe that solves anything, that is simply giving the child permission to go have sex. But what do you do? I am afraid there are no clear cut objectives to answer this question. There are no books and no rules, only opinions of options that may work, but that cannot be guaranteed.

Answer 3

I first kissed a boy when I was 12. He was also 12 and he had already had full intercourse. I was really gobsmacked by that and attributed it to him being an American! 14 seems to be the age that a lot of girls are first having sex, I don't know about boys, but we do here about plenty of teenage pregnancies - the UK having the highest rate in the whole of Europe. A couple of years ago an 11 year old in Scotland had a baby - her mother said that she was proud that her daughter had decided not to have an abortion! How she felt about her daughter drinking, smoking and having full intercourse unprotected was not touched on in the media!

Answer 4

I am a 39 year old mother. I have three kids 17,13 and 11 years old. What you are thinking of doing is unrealistic and a bit extreme. You want to lock them up and then when they are 18 you will expect them to know how to act and to learn to drive. You cannot do that. You will be stifling them. You need to teach your children right from wrong and educate them about sex. You need to teach them to have respect for themselves and for others. You need to teach them everything that they need to know to take care of themselves and to make informed decisions in their lives. You need to teach them how they are to treat the opposite sex and how they should expect and demand to be treated by them also. You should not keep them away from the opposite sex like they do not exist. Why would you want to hinder your child so much? We know the statistics and we also were teenagers once too. My children have been taught right from wrong and I would hope that they will make the right decisions. They are supervised as much as possible but you also have to let them live. The lines of communication are open and they are not afriad to use them. There has to be a little trust and faith. If the kids are kept in the dark, are sheltered and not allowed to be out of your sight they will make rash decisions and be rebelious. The wildest kids and the loosest girls are usually the ones that their parents try to keep under lock and key.

Answer 5

I have 4 kids. 3 girls and a boy. And I am scared by the statistics of the numbers and ages of kids doing very adult things. I have seen reports about kids having oral sex so they can say they are still virgins because "oral sex isn't sex". That just has me dumb-founded. I remember learning about sex in 4th grade and giggling about the proper terms for the reproductive organs.

How have we gone from so shy about our bodies to our children being so open with them? I don't understand but honestly I blame it mostly on the media. The openness of the dalogue and explicit pictures of womens bodies have an effect of children. I did a term paper for one of my college classe that showed how the media and advertising effect young children.

Movies and television shows now have ratings so parents can set a chip on their tvs and protect their kids from these showsthat are too advanced for them but honestly, how many arents set their v-chips?

I know a woman who allows her 10 year old, 5 year old, and 3 year old watch horror movies and she also leaves porn out where the 10 year old can mistake it for a regular movie an pop it into the dvd player at any particular moment.

I can't blame it completely on tv and movie. Some parents just aren't as vigilant of their kids as I am of mine. Many parents go to work or just "out" and leave their children alone and unsupervised. They don't know where they have been most of the day or what they have been doing and some just don't care.

I think unless some parents start worrying more about what their kids are up to and less about the score of the football game or what they Desperate Housewives are up to, we ae going to have higher raes of teen pregnancy and higher rtes of teenagers with STDs and AIDS.

Answer 6

It is difficult to mention Through all their faults, my mom and dad did a super task. They raised four vivid and victorious kids. We are all self sufficient, have well jobs and deal with others with recognize and compassion. I do the pleasant I can with my 2, nevertheless on the age of seven I quite can not examine what kind of guys they are going to be. I can handiest desire that I have controlled to instill in them the equal values my mom and dad did which I deliver to nowadays. Right now they're super kids. They are vivid, form and handy. However I nonetheless ought to make it via the teenage years. This is a query to potentially reply in a different twenty years, whilst I have 2 younger guys who name me mother. Then I shall be in a position to inform you extra correct what kind of humans I raised after which perhaps I may have a larger reply. However on the second, I can desire for no less than the equal, and if feasible exceed what my mom and dad did.

Answer 7

I am 16 and have a son who is going to be one. I lost my virginity at the age of 13 to a 16 year old virgin. I used protection (condoms) and was careful, but my son is still here. My mother never talked to me about sex, I knew what I knew from my peers. In my opinion it isn't the act or the age. It's making sure your kids know how to protect themselves. I know a boy who was sheltered his WHOLE life. Not allowed to date, not allowed to be alone with girls, not allowed to do well.... much of anything. He died at the age of 25 from AIDS due to heroin (sharing needles) and sleeping with an AIDS infected girl. He didn't know anything about drugs or sex until he went to college. Educate, protect, and be open.

Answer 8

All you really can do is prepare them for sexual activities; the use of condoms and birth control ; I scared my kids by telling them that kissing will give them a deadly disease that they can't get rid of; when they heard about aids; they put two and two together and I didn't have that problem in high school

Answer 9

doing that wont stop them from having sex. u jsut need to trust there judgment and make sure they r edu. on sex and what could happen. the more u keep them locked in the more they will want to get out and do something so jsut let them just be normal and trust them.

Answer 10

I have two girls and yes It scares me to think about what they may face in the future. As a parent I have to teach my children right from wrong and trust them to make the right decisions when the time comes. I have to teach them about sex and it's consequences and trust that I raised them right. I am a firm believer in abstinence!