I babysitt for a friend..her daughter is 4 yrs old..she is always saying sorry for everything she does..if she drops a toy(sorry)...it doesn't matter what she's doing..it's always SORRY..I've told her it's ok..and that she doesn't need to say sorry...her mom is very good with her..she doesn't get spanked or yelled at for making messes etc..her mom doesn't know why she started doing this...the problem now...is that my 2 toddlers are now starting to do the same as her...also she bites her nails all the time...and now my 3 yr old is doing this..but he always bites his toe nails...any ideas how to stop this for all the kids...someone said to not babysit..I can't tell her I won't babysit anymore and don't want to do this...she's a single mother and is working very hard to put a downpayment on a little home for the 2 of them...so she can't afford daycare...other then this...she listens and is a good girl...gets along great with my kids...
2007-12-24 04:22:52 · 14 answers · asked by ~Jenny~ 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
I don't freak out about it..it just looks bad when I or the mom go out in public and this is done..I've done the time out for the nail biting..but as I said it's not working..her daughter bites her nails til it's bleeding..so the pain of it isn't working either..and please if you're going to be rude..just don't answer..just want help from people that have been through this...they seem to understand..ty
2007-12-24 04:31:03 · update #1
she was actually in preschool..a child was always pulling her hair and being mean...that's why I told the mom I would watch her...because the school couldn't get the child to stop..someone suggested putting lemon on the fingers because the taste will make her stop...but I can't do that...cuz she has sores on a couple fingers..and that will burn..her mom I can honestly say has done all she can do even spoke with the doctor...and no she isn't or hasn't been abused by family or friends
2007-12-24 04:37:47 · update #2
Im sure it's just a phase - my 4yr old son was doing the same thing for a while (kinda drove me nuts). I just sat him down and asked why he said sorry all the time.... very simple answer "i dont know"- so I explained what sorry meant and when it was neccessary to say it. He understood and then he stopped. Im sure he was just confused.
The nail biting thing is a nasty habit. Try offering a reward system for each day she doesnt bite her nails. I would make her stop everytime you see her doing it. It is going to be hard to break!!!
2007-12-24 08:31:06 · answer #1 · answered by Just trying to make it 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been told I was the same way as a child, and actually I still do this sometimes.
It's most likely her way of telling you she knows what she did is either wrong or she's sorry (obviously). You mentioned she was in preschool..did they maybe ounish her for things like that? I know some preschools do use time-out and other things to children who are "clumsy" and what not...recently just had a similar experience and that is why we now use home daycare as well...better care, cheaper (usually), and home daycare providers listen to the parents
anyway, It's prob. just a phase and if not then It's actually not the most terrible thing in the world :)
as far as the nailbiting that's a nervous habit that will be hard to break but must be done.
Tell her mom to keep her nails short all the time (not to the quick short) and when you see her biting pull her hand down...and continue to do this until she's broke..It won't be easy but IMO a child shouldn't be punished for biting their nails, It's only a habit not something bad she's doing..anyway, just MO of course
2007-12-24 14:32:03 · answer #2 · answered by CJ&Drewsmomma 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if shes a good kid otherwise whats the big deal?tell your friend her daughters constant apologizing is rubbing off on your children.ask her to explain to her daughter when its approriate to say sorry ( when you hurt someones feelings,break something or do something you arent supposed to) let her know that sorry has lost all of its meaning.
since you are with her frequently you can start retraining the little girl and let her know when its ok to say sorry.
nailbiting is another thing.that might be more difficult.i suggest buying a bottle of neverbite from the drugstore and painting their nails (its clear) when they nibble on their nails they get a nasty taste and hopefully it deters them from nail biting.
edit- yikes!she bites her nails until they bleed??she needs help.theres someting else going on there. shes a stressed out little girl.her mom too i bet.it might seem extreme but therapy is a good option.she should check with the state for mental and health services.
best of luck to you - youre a good friend for trying to help in anyway you can.
2007-12-24 12:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by i<3laura 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is normal for them to "stick" on certain behaviors like saying sorry or nail biting just smile at her lots and when she bites on her nails, which my 3yro does also, kindly remove her hand from her teeth....when she says sorry just smile and let it go. it is ok. talk about how hard her mommy works and how pleased you both are with the little tyke give her some good work to do around your home so that she feels productive and you can sing her praises and instill the confidecnce she needs.....I hope this helps you all.
2007-12-24 12:40:54 · answer #4 · answered by just duky 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to get the kids to stop biting the get no bite its thi foul tasting nail polish that you dont put ur fingers in your mouth. i have no cue how to stop the sorries but tell them u cant say sorry for the day unless u do something bad. teach them a lesson
2007-12-24 12:32:17 · answer #5 · answered by sk8er 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like that child is stressed out. Maybe she is picking up on her mother's stress. Does anyone else look after her does she have any other sibligs or maybe cousins that could be dare I say abusing her in some way. Maybe a kid at school but she is too young to go to school. Just my two cents
2007-12-24 12:27:35 · answer #6 · answered by daisyduck4007 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
lol as for her always saying - sorry- it must be a habit..because when i was younger around 6 years old i was always asking my mom if i could go to the bathroom.. instead of just going.. this was after starting school tho so it could be because of that.
2007-12-24 12:33:56 · answer #7 · answered by ProudMom_of_2_gorgeous_boys 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say that there is no need to say sorry.. Explain the uses of the word and when ONLY for it to be used.. Hopefully she should understand .. And you wont have to worry anymore
Hope i helped
x
2007-12-24 12:26:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
she will grow out of it. just tell ur kids they don't gotta say sorry and not to bite their nails thats all
2007-12-24 12:26:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its a phase, a lot of kids go though it, just like the "why" phase.
Tell your kids to stop biting their nails, punish them if they dont listen- put them on time out or remind them or something.
It'll all pass, just dont freak out about it.
2007-12-24 12:25:32 · answer #10 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 5⤊ 2⤋