My ex-boyfriend broke up with me few months ago. It was hard break up cos I didnt want to break up. He didnt want to continue our long-distance relationship and ended it. But he kept contacting me telling me he finds it hard, he misses me. He was angry when I told him that the only way I can get over this is to stop contact.We met twice since the break up, it was very nice but each time he left, he said as long as we are in long-distance, we cant be together. It was always so hard to see him, to be with him and then seeing him go again. month ago, he contacted me againg saying he finds it hard and he still loves me. I felt the same but then he said we cannot be together because the situation is still the same. I told him I must close the door as its too hard as I still love him. But he sent me email 2 days ago saying he finds it hard, he misses me and is not sure he wants to move on. He doesnt want me to think he doesnt want me anymore. Wanted to wish me Merry Xmas. I didnt reply yet.
2007-12-23 21:21:27 · 13 answers · asked by Elisa N 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He sent me another email yesterday asking me if I received his email. I am 30 years old for your info.
2007-12-23 21:22:21 · update #1
Either move in with him or tell him to leave you alone, he can't keep breaking your heart like that.
2007-12-23 21:25:11 · answer #1 · answered by stumpymosha 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I realise this must be a hard decision to make. But if he wants to be with you .. Isn't it him stopping the relationship anyway?
Well.. i think if you two really love each other, you would make the effort to some how be together. Move to where he is or other way round...
Another solution would be to not reply to messages... And soon he will give up. If he doesn't then something needs to be done for you two to be together but if not... You should try to move on with no contact.. You are 30... You have time to find someone else and maybe realise that he is just a special person in your life... But he cannot be with you and always be there.. You need someone you can be with and have fun with.. Meet up and progress.. Especially if children are in the horizon for you...
You need to think what is best for you...I think you need to either find a way you can be together or move on to someone else who can be there and you can have a life with someone there..
Hope that helped xx
2007-12-24 04:28:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you because he tells you no long distance relationship then he contact you gets angry when you tell the truth. He sound to me that he want to stay in control. He must not allow him to control you this way or any other way for that matter If you do reply just say Happy xmass and nothing more. Be strong for you and who you are. If this was happening to your best friend what advice would you give her? Now follow that advice. Wishing all the best for the future and remember be who you are not what someone thinks you should be.
2007-12-24 13:10:43 · answer #3 · answered by signfish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, this guy in my opinion is either a realist or insecure. Realist: Coz yeah, longdistance dont work, but there are hundreds of exceptions. So, in this case he really loves you. Insecure: I dont know how u look or he does, may be he is looking out and is not hooked up yet, so he enjoys to bask in ur company which I dont know my be more beyond words.
Suggestion, find out if he is insecure:
then do the same...... u look out as well, and play along.
if he is a realist
then stop contact, either it'll make him come at you dispite of the distance or gone for good.
2007-12-23 21:33:26 · answer #4 · answered by Crazy me! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi... if there is no way you two can get together and BE together, then don't let him string you along.. one minute he wants the relationship, the next he doesn't.
maybe it's time for you to move on, unless there is a "fix" for the matter of distance between you. otherwise, by staying in touch and responding to him, you are only prolonging the agony... make a clean break if you aren't going to live closer or together..
2007-12-23 21:29:19 · answer #5 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe u r too confused in making a decision! Tell you what - all men r same...they dont respect the relationship when its existing and later try to reassure things after screw ups...What I understand is he dumped you for whatsoever reason...do u think he will not make that mistake again...I dont say all guys are perfect but then you are not married to him. Hence, you have all the time in the world to decide (practically) over the situation...Keep aside your motions at present..Wishing greetings to each other should not bother you
2007-12-23 21:31:24 · answer #6 · answered by Mahesh Patel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you would appreciate it if he let you move on, since he can not make up his mind what he wants to do.
It is all probably for the best anyway. Long distance relationships are extremely hard for both parties. I know, I am in one, but at least we get to see each other every weekend.
2007-12-23 21:27:10 · answer #7 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him a direct question. say 'do you want this relationship to continue? the fact is that it will have to be long-distance' then say 'if the answer is yes, then good, i want that too. if the answer is no, then stop contacting me cos i cant recover from this when you are still a part of my life.'
2007-12-23 21:26:49 · answer #8 · answered by Chewyconor 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him either you do the long distance thing until you can be together and if not cut it lose. that has to be hard tell him how you feel about him and the "relationship" and then stick to it Good luck
2007-12-23 22:04:05 · answer #9 · answered by onenonlymanna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends whether there is future for both of you...happy future. Do not do anything that will make you feel worse. Do not do anything for him...think about yourself, how you are feeling. Be strong whatever you decide!
Good luck
2007-12-23 21:34:55 · answer #10 · answered by ladybird 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋