my bf got me pregnant and he's too scared to face his responsibilities with our baby. we broke up over a year already and he never got a chance to see our kid because things are really too complicated for the both of us. i never saw him eversince i gave birth but sometimes he calls up and says that he loves the both of us. i really dont know if i'll believe him or not because he left me after knowing he got me pregnant. he explained that he just need enough time to think about things but i dont know if i really need to wait... will i still give him this chance to make up with me and our baby??
2007-12-23 14:27:27 · 12 answers · asked by gOtHiC pRiNcEsS 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I would take it slow - don't take him back into heart and home in an instant. But he deserves a chance to get to know his child, every parent does. There's no knowing if he's made true positive changes without seeing. Just because you're visiting him or seeing him occasionally doesn't mean you have to commit to a life with him. I'd be straight up with him and tell him he's got a lot of ground to make up for and you've got no long term intentions, starting from scratch, etc.
I was fatherless growing up, and its been very difficult to process. I think if he wants to get to know his child, he deserves a chance.
2007-12-23 14:37:31 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he does not pay child support, he has no right to see the baby. See a lawyer, have court ordered payments set up. He has to take responsibility for his actions. Not give you a few bucks here and there.
He may have reformed, but I would be very skeptical. Anyone can say "I love you". He probably said that many times before he got you pregnant and dumped you.
2007-12-23 14:40:19 · answer #2 · answered by hamrrfan 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had nearly the same thing happen to me.My son turned 2 today and we haven't heard from that jerk in over a year. I missed him and wanted to give him a second chance, but I thought about how it would be and if it was the right thing to do for me and for my son.He's never laid eyes on my son to this day.I want what is best for my child and I give him all the love I can.Now I have a great partner who is his other parent(that loves him like a parent) and he is so far a very happy and well rounded child.It all depends on you and your situation.I've learnt that most men are selfish pigs but that's just me.Good Luck!
2007-12-23 14:42:03 · answer #3 · answered by Keeky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever you do don't give him a single chance to take custody. Good luck. Oh and love is not a choice it's a commitment , he's too late for love. Your baby deserves to know their father, but your responsibility is to do what is best for your child. Let them have supervised visits and nothing else.
2007-12-23 16:35:07 · answer #4 · answered by Aimee's Mommy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the dirtbag is not around yet he never will be. Find a real man and go to Child support enforcement and nail him to the wall for child support.
Or jsut sue him to give up his rights. But I would make him pay and pay threw the nose.
If he did not want a kid he should have kept his penis in his damn pants.
2007-12-23 14:34:04 · answer #5 · answered by cpttango30 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he was a good guy he would not have left you to have this child alone and not take an active role in this childs life.
It is your call if you let him in, but be cautious because he may walk out again at any time and you cant count on him and neither can your child.
2007-12-23 14:32:32 · answer #6 · answered by Valerie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know you don't have to be with him but you can at least make a friendship and let him try to be a part of your child's life,tell him you can see our child but the first time you screw up then no more,you will be happy to know that your child grows up with a daddy and a mommy. like i said give it some time and see if you would like to get back together with him or if it would be better to just be friends,and going the friendship way is better than nothing at all. much luck to you and congrats...on your new baby
2007-12-23 14:35:57 · answer #7 · answered by moonstone2009 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Run away,,,,,do not walk, do not pass go and collect 200.00. This man will never be a useful (as in financially supportive) father and partner. Any involvement will only complicate your life. Do what you have to to take care of your baby, but leave daddy out of it.
2007-12-23 14:46:22 · answer #8 · answered by redwitch54 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Tracy M. You should give the father of your child a second chance, for your baby's sake. Maybe he's come around, maybe not, but he's the guy you chose to father your child.
2007-12-23 14:35:50 · answer #9 · answered by BrutalBaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he was an *** ! if he ran out on that situation hes gonna back down at a worst situation that u may go through ,i just feel so sad for ur kids. think about it and get some other opinions.
but your children do need a father.....
2007-12-23 14:40:11 · answer #10 · answered by AMD Promotions 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋