ok i am married and i have been for 9 years and my husband is a control freak he dont spend any time with me hardly and he goes out all the time and im left here at home and i just wont you to tell me do u think its wrong for me to have someone like a man friend to just talk to on the phone do u think thats a bad thing for me to do and my husband have founded out about it and he is very mad at me so tell me what do you think about this just keep it real ! and my i add i have not cheated in any way i just feel the need of someone to talk to every now and then
2007-12-23 13:21:58 · 11 answers · asked by fe-fe 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well of course its wrong and where do you think this will eventually lead to !!! You should be working on your relationship with your husband and no one else . You may be talking behind his back with your new friend and his talking about his wife . I have seen it at all the times , Being in the insurance business for the last 27 years I could tell all kind of stories and very fortunate I always kept as business and not to say that the temptation wasn't there either . But I was strong enough to say no or avoid the client approaches . If this man is joining you in the conversation and he is married as well , that means you are both unhappy in your own relationship and comforting each other emotionally that may well eventually lead to sexual relationship . You may say that you haven't cheated on your husband but I will say the opposite that you have emotionally and you just haven't got to the sexual part as of yet . It just a matter of time before you get there .Good luck and God bless
2007-12-23 13:35:49 · answer #1 · answered by Gentleman 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you have been married to this man for 9 years and he likes to be in control and dont spend time with you at all and you have a male friend that you talk to i dont see anythng wrong with it, He has the neverve to get jealous about it perhaps if he spent more time with you he wouldnt be so upset about it. The problem with this is that you have allowed this man to take control and know no one has the right to control your life husband or not. Now you married him and you feel that you are stuck with him tell you what start to take back your own life in your hands. You should have known this part of him before you ever married him.
best of luck
2007-12-23 21:36:08 · answer #2 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A man friend while your husband is out partying. Some people in marriage count that as cheating borderline. What do you talk about over the phone with your male friend the weather and your pets. Tell your husband you will no longer tolerate being left at home alonge while he parties. Or it's over!, yes a good man wouldn't do this
2007-12-23 21:33:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you when you say you haven't cheated. But there are two very good reasons not to continue this friendship:
1 - One-on-one friendships with people of the opposite sex can be traps, especially when you share private information. This creates a kind of false intimacy which can lead to a sexual relationship; and
2 - You should never do anything which will reasonably be a problem for your spouse. If you were with a group of people in a coffee shop and some of them were men, it would be unreasonable of your husband to object, unless one of those men were someone you had had a relationship with. But, if you were having coffee alone with another man, some husbands might reasonably object. It is not right to cause your spouse worry or pain.
I hope that you will get yourself some girlfriends that you can talk to, as you need someone to relate to. But a man is a poor choice to fill this role. Good luck!
2007-12-23 21:33:00 · answer #4 · answered by Terri J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really should avoid having a friendship that in depth with a man other than your husband. It will only invite trouble. I would be pretty annoyed if my wife were suddenly chatting with another man on the phone all the time. I would expect her to be upset if I were doing the same with a woman. Avoid it.
2007-12-23 22:02:39 · answer #5 · answered by Lee K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do need someone to talk to but finding a man friend is walking down the wrong path. That is just adding to your problems. Find a councelor. If he wont go with you , go yourself.
2007-12-23 21:32:20 · answer #6 · answered by purplewaterhorse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep only girl friends so that this friend does not think you are leading them on. And if your husband finds out he may hurt you! don't mess with it and just keep close girlfriends only, until you decide what you are going to do
2007-12-23 21:38:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the two of you need counseling.
Word to the wise...next time you ask a question here, try not to write a run-on sentence. I could barely understand what you were asking.
Good luck sweetie.
2007-12-23 21:26:15 · answer #8 · answered by Eddie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How would you feel if he had a "GIRL FRIEND" that he talks to?.... Plus him being a control freak he won't understand that you are just his friend.
Go to counceling and stop talking to your friend.
2007-12-23 21:31:48 · answer #9 · answered by Whatdoido 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when he leaves make sure you leave with girls too he will learn from that and if it comes down to a divorce then do it. do not let a man tell you what to do...good luck
2007-12-23 21:25:57 · answer #10 · answered by daisy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋