They say they want to get marry but when it has been 4yrs . I feel like i am wasting my time with him. I decieded to give him one more year before i throw in the towel.
2007-12-23 00:29:25 · 17 answers · asked by vivi010571 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you love him enough to even think about marrying him then it's worth the wait. Don't force him to marry you before he is ready or it will not work out. Take things slow and life will go much easier. I am in the same boat you are. I have been with this guy for 5 years and I am so ready for marriage but, he isn't. I am waiting for him and when he is ready it will happen. As they say..."Good things come to those who wait." Wait it out and you will be happy for a lifetime! Good Luck!
2007-12-23 00:35:15 · answer #1 · answered by Birdy 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2007-12-23 00:37:43 · answer #2 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps the question here is...what is it you want out of the relationship? What we cannot see here is whether the relationship is working or not? Does he give you the things you desire...love, friendship, sex, togetherness, doing things together, support and all of the elements of a strong relationship.
Getting married to say you are married is a crock of crap. It is usually the beginning of the end...
Know what you want...then find a person who will give it to you and never ASSUME they will or will not be able to give you anything...test the theories, go on a vacation, go shopping, live together, go out with each others friends, do everything that may cause you to get pissed off or have a disagreement BEFORE you even consider marriage...
If he gives you all of what you desire...perhaps he has a thing about marriage...so ask...if all you have been doing for the past 4 years is hanging out...bail...find someone who will give you what you want...at the very least you need to communicate what you want...after all, that is what you will be doing for the rest of your life.
2007-12-23 01:05:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anthony P L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends....if he's in his 20's, usually they're not ready yet, if it's 30's, they're getting there, so 4 years may not be that long...especially with getting careers and money situated.....if he's in his 40's, i'd have to say, those guys pretty much know within 6 months if they see a future with you, at least according to all my male 40+ friends......good luck
2007-12-23 03:31:51 · answer #4 · answered by justlilme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it till Next Christmas if he is under 25 but if hes over 25 then I would tell him hoew I feel and if he doesn't feel the same say you have to move on If he doesn't come around just let him go good luck Merry Christmas.
2007-12-23 01:13:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just got married 5 months ago and my husband and I had been together for 6 years prior to marriage. I wanted to complete my family and set my life up and I didn't want to be without him. He on the other hand always knew in his heart that we'd be together but I felt I personally wanted more! So I sat down one day and set up the pattern for life! So I went and found me an apartment that I knew I could afford! I then started getting my life together and weighing my life out with him and without him. I explainned to him if marriage and a future with me and his son wasn't in his agenda then I wanted out to look forward to setting my life up for both my son and I because I no longer wanted to be his girlfriend, I didn't want to keep carrying on like I was his wife without the title! I love him whole hearted and he was my life but I wanted more.... He sat back and saw all the changes that I was getting ready for without him and I've always included him in everything and then things for us changed he realized that I'd been his life for 6 years and that I was right it seemed like a waste to keep playing house! So we got married less then a year later in Jamaica with our friends any family! Now I'm happy and he feels the difference in the relationship, and so do I! So my advice to you is make your mark for five a whole number after you get to five, sit down and explain to him what you want in life and if his agenda at that table isn't the same as your's then don't waste no more of your life! To come full circle you both have to be evenly yoked meaning on the same accord in life!
2007-12-23 01:42:05 · answer #6 · answered by rita_hiemy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ask him if marriage to you is in his future plans. If not, you are wasting your life - there is someone out there for you who does want to marry you, but you will have to leave this guy to find the right one.
2007-12-23 00:49:46 · answer #7 · answered by Bette 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I beleive in destiny but I still think you have to fight to save your marriage. Especially if you have children.
This ebook is a good resource to understand causes of your marital issues and to learn some important tips --> http://savemarriage.toptips.org
2014-09-26 03:42:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actions speak louder than words. It has been 4 years, why waste another year of your life.....you could break up with him today and tomorrow be one day closer to finding someone that loves you and wants a healthy committed relationship.
2007-12-23 00:36:52 · answer #9 · answered by George 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
thats a hard one ive been with my guy for 7 yrs we have 2 kids ive never thought bout leaving him if he doesnt but it def makes me feel like why wont he marry me... he says it cuz he wants 2 buy a really expensive ring and we dont have money only 1 income family
2007-12-23 00:49:41 · answer #10 · answered by Crystal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋