Please Help: What is wrong with me?

Question

I continue to be called a boy at school due to my lach of butt, and breasts. After being taunted constantly I am starting to feel like a male. I constantly now think and wish I was a male so their would be less taunting. I also feel as if I would make a better male than female. Am I bisexual, or gay. Why am I thinking this way?

I am fourteen and I tend to feel this way before the taunting the taunting has just led me into a process of thinking and questioning why I feel this way. I have a lesbian friend and she currently has a girlfriend I am almost jealous and see us together. I always picture if I was only a boy.

Answer 1

Firstly, there is nothing wrong with you--NO MATTER WHAT THE ANSWER to your questions may be. Whether you are gay, bisexual, or straight, we all come into this world as human beings--and that means we all have the need to be loved!!! Unfortunately, that also means that others do not get the love that they need, so they need to take their anger and frustration out on other people. Don't let these bullies push you into being someone you are not. Dressing a certain way or just because you have not yet fully developed does not mean anything--gender-wise. To answer the questions you have about yourself, I would recommend seeing a counselor. I wouldn't, however, recommend changing anything about you simply because of bullies. Conforming to their idea of what a "girl" should look like will only hurt YOU in the long run, because you will be dressing and acting for THEM, not for yourself. Talk to a counselor, a friend, and even try talking to some of them (one-on-one) if you can....maybe the group mentality is what is egging their bullying on--if you ask the counselor to talk to the others, it may help.

Answer 2

First, those that are insecure themselfs often criticize in order to cover their own insecurities. Often the most normal of people are insecure due to the fact no one ever gives them verbal assurances. Never assume that just because a person is popular or good looking that that person does not feel insecure too. Again, this is why these people criticize those they see as being not normal...it makes them feel superior and more secure.

Second, if you are past puberty and still have no hips and no breasts then yes you are different and you should acccept that. A large portion of the human race is "different". Some more and some less than others. It is a fact of life. You need to assess you're good attributes and make use of them.

Third, how to handle what people say? There is very little you can do other than pretend not to hear and try to stay positive. You will eventually meet people that like you for your personality and enjoy being with you because of that. In the "meantime", better yourself, learn things, become strong..read The Count of Monte Christo. Not that I think you should spend the rest of your life getting revenge... but use the "meantime" as a powerful tool and motivator. Take the negative energy and turn it into positive energy for you to use.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

first of, your body doesn't make a person gay. Gay women aren't just butch and gay men aren't just "fairies". Secondly, so what if you have have no boobs or butt? Guys taunt girls no matter what. personally I have had boobs and a butt from an early age and I still was teased and harassed. They would say things like I got breast implants and things like that. Guys do harass you because they know it hurts you, just like it hurt me. What you need to do is learn how to be comfortable with who you are. It's hard. I'm still battling with self-esteem issues and I think I always will. But you can't change you body (at least until you turn 18 and can afford a boob job, which i definitely don't recommend). People hurt other people no matter how they look. You just have to learn how to love who you are and be proud of that.

Answer 4

Most humans are born potentially bisexual, and the society in which they are brought up influences them. If you are at the lower end of the healthy weight range, for your height, consider putting on a few pounds, but no more than 7, since those areas, in the female body, are mostly adipose tissue. There are exercises that you can do, to increase the size of your gluteus maximus (the muscles in your butt). Check out bodybuilding, and use the same number of reps, as you flex, and then relax those muscles. You may just be a "late bloomer", who will fill out quite nicely, but for the moment, foam inserts may help, and later, in a few years, you might consider cosmetic surgery, but I doubt by that time you will really need it. Try approaching those boys who aren't jerks, about study/homework groups. Be friendly, funny, and interesting. Visit your school counselor, and consider having your hormone levels checked by your doctor, because lack of female hormones may be responsible. Soy products mimic female hormones, biochemically, so eat tofu, soy milk, soy "meat loaf", soy & linseed bread, for a few years, but quit, once out of the teens. Practise one of the relaxation methods on pages 2, 11, 2c, or 2i, daily, and when needed. Also, give the EFT a good tryout, to see if it helps you: "Even though I currently have smallish breasts and butt, I deeply and completely accept myself". Section 53, and pages 2, 2.q and 2.o at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris also refer. Self/esteem/confidence are addressed in section 38, and there is something appropriate to your problem in TEENS, in section 13. Volunteer, even from home, at first, to provide a solid basis in reality for the daily affirmations: "I am a good person, who is valued by my community, because I.. (insert activity here)..". Section 47 refers.

Answer 5

You don't say how old you are so that could have something to do with your being called a boy--you just haven't developed your ultimate shape.

As to whether you are gay or bisexual, that has to do with being attracted to the same sex. It is NOT a choice you consciously make. Once you start wanting to date, if you find yourself more interested in other women/girls, then you are probably gay or at least bisexual. If your interest lies with boys or men, then you are straight.

As to why you are feeling this way--you haven't developed your physical self so are questioning some of the thoughts going thru your head. They are normal thoughts...don't judge them.

Answer 6

Well it all comes down to how u feel about urself. Your not bisexual unless u actually are. Just because you look a certain way doesnt mean u r. Sometimes it takes awhile for girls to develop. Dressing more girly might help with the taughting, and may ultimately help u decide where ur at.

Answer 7

You are being bullied and sexually harrassed and that is illegal. Talk to your teacher about it. If nothing is done, have your parents contact the principal and the school board. Your parents can sue them and collect damages unless they take action to stop it.
Ask your parents to buy you a padded bra and try to gain a little weight. There is nothing wrong with you. Look at the super models. They are thin and do not have big breasts. You have lost your self confidence because of this bad treatment. You will be a beautiful woman. Just wait and see.

Answer 8

TRULY everyone during their teen years, sometimes before and sometimes after experiences doubt about what their sexuality is, or if they would be better were they a differant gender or living their life that way. You are thinking thoughts everyone has wondered about themselves at some point in time, and if anyone says they haven't they are fooling themselves and others. Do not be afraid of what you are thinking.. Lack of butt and breasts IS NOT what you determines if you would make a better male of female. Most likely you have allot more brains than the people that are making comments of this nature to you. My suggestion to you is to go into a room where you have complete privacy. I am a 50 Plus old mother of 2 girls and 7 grandchildren so please know I am not going to say something WEIRD. You can even talk to your Dr. and Pastor about this. My suggestion is that you stand naked in front of a full length mirror and study your body. Look at every part of your body. Look at differant angles of the same areas. Be familiar with your body, what it looks like, what it feels like when you touch your body. Tell yourself out loud that you like your body (name the areas if you can (fingers, toes, breast, nipple, leg, foot, lips, butt cheeks, all of them. Touch look and feel your self. Tell Jesus you like your body and thank Him for designing you perfectly, individually, differant than anyone else. Get to where you can actually feel like you can own what it is you are saying. When you get dressed, tell yourself how nice those parts of your body look in the clothing you select for yourself. When you are getting into the shower or tub, do the same. Tell yourself nice things about your body. It is your body and you are special. In addition you can tell yourself you have a good mind, heart and soul. God Bless you, and love you. God does and you are worth it.

Answer 9

im a gay 15 year old too,
but theres nothing wrong with you.
write in a journal daily, talk to your friends about this.
try girlier clothing, or anything that you like.
dont be afraid to show who you are, and your still young, and growing.
who cares of what other people think, your the ruler of your life,
just ignore them, because sooner or later your going to be pretty.
:]

Answer 10

Two possibilities. One, you may be transsexual, which means that you were a boy born into a girl body. But more likely, is that the comments that your schoolmates are making are starting to get to you, and you want them to stop. It's perfectly normal to imagine a life where things that bother you disappear, and that's probably what's happening to you.