my friend tells me the way to turn your friend into your girlfriend is by ignoring her so ive been trying that. she recently broke up with her bf and my friend says now is the most important time to ignore her. but she texts me saying: 'where are you i miss u so much' i feel like even though i really want to be her boyfriend i love her as a friend to and dont want to see her be sad. any ideas on a comprimise?
2007-12-22 14:52:16 · 31 answers · asked by ukuleleninja e 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
yes it is wrong. why can't you just be a man and tell her how you feel....
2007-12-22 14:55:25 · answer #1 · answered by OhSoFly! 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
That's bold....and misguided. That avenue is just going to land you in the "just good friends" zone permanently. If she didn't have any real romantinc feelings for you before, she never will. I don't care how long you've been friends. THERE'S the rub , right there; you're friends with her. I've seen and experienced this firsthand. The ratio of "friend-girl to girlfreind" transition in relationships is .0001 , in other words, it just doesn't happen enough to rate on the scale , it's an anomoly in the equation. I personally ended up in permanently in the "just good friends" zone many a time. I hate the "just good friends" zone. It's honorary gal pal status and no self respecting man in gal pal status with a girl ever gets out of it. Gal pal status doesn't even merit pity sex. Do yourself and this girl a favor and just give up on the girlfriend thing . She may be worth the effort but this course of action could very well cost you her very company itself.
2007-12-23 09:54:55 · answer #2 · answered by Tarance Brown 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kay, sorry to tell you this dude... but your friend is in an idiot! As a girl I am telling you, if she is in a position where she just got out of a relationship... she needs someone. You are the someone. You are in a little bit of a predicament thou... If you are her friend - a good one, and she wants you as a shoulder to cry on, then that is what you need to do and who you need to be for her. If she is alone, and needs some comforting... then you need to comfort her, and in that you will become closer to her. One of these days, soon, you will be able to tell her how you actually feel - and you should! If you like her... go for her, and don't wait. Believe me... you will regret ignoring her, because you are not only going to lose a friend, but you are also going to lose your lover.
2007-12-22 22:59:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're just being mean and foolish...and why would you want someone on the rebound anyway? If she got with you, you'd be her rebound guy (filling in for the one she just broke up with). Those relationships don't tend to last long.
If you are her friend, be a FRIEND and don't bail on her when she needs a good support system. If you dig her, tell her so...your current behavior is just likely to leave you high and dry (for good reason).
Don't play games with people's emotions...when teens learn that, they'll be a step ahead of the game when they hit adulthood and start having real relationships.
2007-12-22 22:59:13 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop playing games. Focus on what is important, and that is the friendship. If anything is ment to be more then friends, then you don't want that to happen by playing games and when she is hurting because of another guy. YOu need to be completely honest, or you aren't being a good friend and you are deceiving the situation.
2007-12-22 22:57:13 · answer #5 · answered by Maalru3 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, no offense, but your friend sounds like an idiot. Except it is probably NOT a good idea to immediately jump into a dating relationship if she just broke up with someone - but, at least you should be her friend. She needs you as a friend, and you should be there.
2007-12-22 23:00:06 · answer #6 · answered by eldots53 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ignore the friend. He is an idiot. Go to this girl and ask her out as " a distraction" for her recent heartbreak. Take her fishing..or something she would not normally consider doing. "Charm" her with your enthusiasm for her. Let her know that you are sincerely interested in her and her happiness.
2007-12-22 23:00:30 · answer #7 · answered by Chaz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is really messed up to try to manipulate people for any reason. Certainly to hurt someone intentionally will not do you any good. And I'm not sure who told you this mess, but it is not true. Want to bring her to you, then just be honest with her and be kinda and sweet. Not nasty. What goes around comes around, so if you were to get her by manipulation, before you know it, she will be manipulating you, and you'll see how crappy it feels.
2007-12-22 22:59:16 · answer #8 · answered by CB 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's just so wrong on so many different levels. if she's lucky she will forget you as a friend, friends don't treat friends like that. you are not being her friend at all. you're running with the wrong bunch to succeed at anything by the sound of it. sounds like two against one even..... friends are for each other in case you didn't get the memo, they don't purposely hurt anyone.
2007-12-24 11:35:07 · answer #9 · answered by Michael 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
never hurt someone you love, what a silly thing to think. How is hurting her feeling and being abandoned by you in a time when she has broken up from her boyfriend going to make her like YOU more, she wont, dont try tactics with girls, be yurself and things happen like magic, sometimes with people who you least expect
2007-12-22 22:57:02 · answer #10 · answered by puddleduck 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is WRONG. You don't win someone's heart by ignoring them.
Be there for her. Be supportive. Be her friend. When she STOPS being upset about her ex-bf, you should tell her how you feel. NOT before.
2007-12-22 22:55:54 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋