I'm so desperate... please help me.?

Question

My son is 17 months old. He has the worst temper I've ever seen a child have. He screams whenever he doesn't get his way. I put him in time-out, and he continues to scream, for hours, sometimes. Whenever he's getting into something he shouldn't, I tell him no, and he just looks at me and continues about what he's getting into. He yells, he hits, he kicks, he throws things. I've tried swatting his rear, I've tried yelling, I've tried timeouts, I've tried ignoring him, I've tried being nice, and frankly, I haven't the faintest idea what to do anymore. I'm going nuts. A friend of mine told me I should have his hearing checked to see if somethings wrong with his ears because of the screaming. But what about everything else? Someone help me!

Tried the spanking thing, too...

Answer 1

Obviously your swat on his rear is like a love tap...because I know growing up,,,mom's around here broke out the old wooden spoon or daddy's belt when we misbehaved,,,and it worked like a charm. They did not abuse or beat us in any way...but you can bet your bottom dollar it got our attention. Discipline is the best thing you can do for your child..as long as it's not abusive physically or verbally! Yelling does not work...start taking away his toys. Each time he does something, threaten to throw away one of his toys. If he continues about it...pick up the toy and throw it in the trash. Let him see it. He'll get the hint. He need to learn to respect you. Period!

Answer 2

He is doing what he can to get Obama axed for pres' however what it so unhappy that insane mccain is an historic evil no hearted bastar% and he demands to be thrown underneath the bus as he's throwing each person else underneath.Did he overlook approximately the keating five or how he mentioned he's going to reduce medicare and medicaid within the billions.Yes ahole hold giving to the wealthy like your self' and taking from the deficient' the aged' and the vets and disabled.This man is the more serious style of a human ever spawned' as he was once now not born...loool

Answer 3

I would say to try talking to him like you were his age, like a neanderthal so to speak. He is young, so he doesn't quite understand talking and the word no, or yelling. The best thing to do in my opinion would be to take his toys away if he throws them, ignore him when he yells, and take him to his room. Make him stay there by himself, until he realizes that no matter what, his screaming won't get him anywhere. It is important that he knows you are in charge, so while he is throwing his tantrums, continue with your daily chores as planned and pretend like he doesn't bother you. As for the stuff he keeps getting into, put it up until he learns to leave it alone. He doesn't quite understand his surroundings, but is getting old enough to feel anger and sadness without the ability to express it. More than likely, this is just a phase that you and he will both come out of stronger. If you are still worried, talk to his pediatrician. He or she can calm any fears and examine the problem better than me, you, or anyone else that isn't trained to work with toddlers.

Answer 4

First you need to realize that your child isn't the only one. :) Some children are very strong willed and it takes a while for them to figure out that you aren't going to cave. My now 5 year old son was just like that, and he still has his moments. My biggest recommendation would be to pick ONE method and use it everytime he has a fit. Don't get me wrong I am pro spanking but only if they are doing something dangerous and you need to get their immediate attention. For me it was picking my son up putting him in on the naughty mat. He had to stay there until he could sit quietly for 1 and a half minutes when he was that age. At 17 months it is important to remember that he is just a baby still so it will take awhile for this to sink in. There is no such thing as a quick fix. If he gets up off the matt, calmy pick him up and put him back. Don't even talk that much to him, act sad if you need to you. Babies don't like their mom's to be sad. After he sits like he is supposed to have him give you a hug to show he is sorry. Repeat this every time he has a tantrum. Believe me he will get sick of spending his day on the mat(or whatever object you decide to use). Just make sure it is an object that they don't play with regularly it needs to have its specific purpose. Good luck!

Answer 5

Checking his hearing sounds like a good idea.
Otherwise, I'd say you need to figure out how to minimize the tantrums. Keep a "tantrum log" of what sets him off, what was happening right before the freak out. If you see a pattern, it should help. You also need to stay calm, firm, and persistent.
Make sure he's engaged in age-appropriate activities throughout the day. Making an appt with your pediatrician for some advice is a good idea, too.

Answer 6

A 17 month old is too young to understand the concept of time-out. Although he recognizes the word "no", he may not fully understand what that means. You need to set up a safe area in your home for him to play freely. When he does something he is not supposed to like throw a toy, take the toy away and re-direct him to another activity.

Answer 7

Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn

and go to the www.mothering.com and seek help from the awesome mothers there.

Try gentle discipline and try to get into his level, what HES feeling. try distracting him to things he CAN play with compared to constantly telling him NO. That ( constant NO ) will lower your childs self esteem and increase tantrums.

Try activities for him, he may just like to constantly be entertained and stimulated educationally like my girls. They need constant interaction to be content. We're on the go from the moment they wake up, with activities. Try and get him outside alot, to a park to run and play. I find my girls get really sensitive and lean towards the upset side of things if they've been kept inside all day ( like when it rains ) get involved with a mothers group in your area and start doing activities with them to be around other moms, get advice and let your child get some friends too :)

I hope this helps good luck!

Answer 8

You just need to be consistent all the time don't punish him for something and then two days later he does the same thing and you don't, that sends the wrong signal to him basically your at a battle of wills and he sounds like he has a strong personality just keep it up be consistent and try not to get discouraged eventually he will give up.

Answer 9

Quit giving in. If you put him in time out, make him stay there until he does his time without crying. If it takes all day, then so be it.

He acts this way because he knows that eventually you give in and he gets whatever he wants. As soon as you show him that this isnt the case, his behavior will improve. However you MUST be consitent. You are not gonna get anywhere if you punish a certain behavior today but let it slide tomarrow. You also have to remain consistent when out in public.

Screaming has nothing to do with his hearing, rahter he is manipulating you.

Answer 10

i would say that this is normal behaviour for his age but it seems a bit much just to be normal behaviour so scrap that an ear test cant hurt so id take him anyway. obviously your at your wits end with it as youv'e tried everything you can i think its time to seek proffessional advice they may be able to help you and your child and detect if your childs behaviour is linked to something else like a condition id check it out

Answer 11

He recognises that he gets attention from his bad behavior. Spend a day focusing only on praising him lots and lots every time he IS behaving. When he does listen, make it a huge deal with lots of positive voices, smiling and cuddles and completely ignore any bad behavior. He will soon learn only being good gets mummys attention.