Please help me. I'm so sad, I have been for a long time - I'd just like to cry, but how do I do it?

Question

I want so badly to just break down and cry, and let all this crap go. I've been sad for so long, but I've always kept it to myself because I didn't want my family to worry about me.

I also didn't want to cry because if I did, then it was like admitting that what happened was real. I don't want to go into detail, but someone I trusted very much tried to take my life, and I didn't want to believe she would do that to me. I just wanted to understand 'why' after everything was over, but I can't.

Now, I just feel like crying. I so just wish I had some way to let this out... I don't understand why I can't - it's been 3 years, I should have cried a long time ago.

Please, please help me. This is the second time I've asked on here, and I've read site after site about crying. I just want to cry in the normal something-awful-happened way. I don't want to fake it, I don't want to stop myself, I just want to let all these feelings go and be done with them, and her, so that I can feel good again.

Answer 1

I hope I don't sound brash. You need to see a therapist. Having worked with people with emotional concerns for some time, I can say that from what you wrote, it appears you need some counseling. Contact a clergy member, a therapist, or social worker, and share with them the concerns and the experiences you have had. You will receive help that will allow you to work through this. Good luck!

Answer 2

I know exactly how you're feeling. I've felt the same way: you need to cry but it won't come out. It's like water behind a dam that won't burst. But men are conditioned by culture not to cry, making this difficult (which is unfortunate).

From your words it sounds like you may have depression, which is a physical disease that affects one of your internal organs called the brain. You shouldn't be stigmatized by this, because it really isn't any different than a physical disease that affects the liver, for example. I would say that you should probably find someone to talk to as soon as you can, a trained professional if possible. If necessary, a doctor can prescribe you drugs (antidepressants) to treat the disease and allow your brain to function normally again. Sometimes just talking about what you feel with a counselor can accomplish the same thing if the depression is not severe. But, since you say this has been going on for three years, then I would say it is severe.

Crying is a physical response to emotional stress. It can be helpful because it probably causes the release of chemicals in the body (like endorphins) that will temporarily make us feel better (yes, we often feel better after a good cry). This, in turn, helps our brain function better which can help us resolve issues and make us feel better for longer. But, if you've been sad for three years, crying is not going to help you. It may make you feel better temporarily, but it won't fix the problem.

My hypothesis is that you can't cry until you figure out exactly what--and why--you're unhappy so that you can have something to cry about. As is often the case, when you figure that out, you experience a catharsis and then you're able to cry (at last!). I would further suppose your problem isn't what happened to you, but rather your response to it. A counselor can make the determination if this is the actual case or not. Anyway, it's the figuring it out that helps fix the problem, not the crying. Crying is a symptom of a problem, not the cure.

From personal experience, you really should talk to a counselor, whether that's a trained counselor, psychologist, school counselor, clergy person, or someone similar. They really can help you, especially figuring out the "why" and helping you let go of the trauma. I really do know what it's like to have someone you care intimately about try to take your life; it happened to me! It took me a long time to work through that, but I did it.

As for your family, I wouldn't recommend hiding things from them just so they don't worry. Your family is the people you should want to worry about you the most! They're often the people in the best position to give you support when you need it most.

Answer 3

If you wanted to cry , com`on do it and cry yourself out! You`ve been controling it for so long, you are patient enough to cry your heart out. Besides crying is good for the health.
I could feel how you feel , because me too has a lot of crying to do. Everytime I feel like crying , I just face the altar and cry before the Lord , it helps a lot , no matter what burden are you in, surely it would ease , if you silently pray. You just simply be humble before Him, pourout your innerself , and don`t hesitate , just believe that everything would be alright.
The better idea is to ask somebody , to help you enhance or let out things that you are keeping inside, it might be a member of your family, who could understand you most. If not your mother , sister , trusted friend or a priest , minister or a nun...these people will be the key to open up your longtime suffering you are keeping inside .
Before doing this you must silently pray , so that the Lord would give you enough strength , and later enlighten your spirit and clear your mind , learn to forgive for yor peace of mind.

Answer 4

Crying real tears is a good release, of pent up emotions. Men will often feel, that it is not manly to be seen crying, then crying in privacy is fine. Are you on any medication, which may also be drying up your tears? You may also need to put into words this disappointment, perhaps to a counselor, who will be able to help you to deal with what has happened to you. This Person has tried to take your life, her mind is sick, and wants to take a life,she needs help>. Spend the time on yourself, and your own health, physical and mental. This is the time of year, when you should be celebrating the coming into the world,of our Lord and Savior. Merry Christmas

Answer 5

It is said that crying is a mechanism for release and that it actually leads to feeling better. That's why it does feel better after a cry. But in this case, it has been delayed for you and has been mounting and bottled up perhaps. In this level or case, you would have to speak with someone who can help you in a professional matter. Besides this, you will always need someone to talk to who is an everyday person. People go through things and their own personal challenges, and you are going through one of your own at this time. But hope and closure is always around and is always reached. Take care of yourself and God bless.

Answer 6

If we remember that the only constant in our life is a 'CHANGE' then we should accept it.You are not allowing yourself to let go of the sad experience for reasons,may be unknown to you but it's for fact.Do it and continue doing it till you have emptied all the emotions about this experience.It should help to build a new life style and mindset.Long suppression may make it a condition where you might have to take professional help and hope it's not already late.Don't resist change,be with it and begin to flow with it and Nature shall take care of all other aspects.All the best.

Answer 7

My advice to you is to see a therapist/councillor. It is clear that you have serious issues and it would be good to talk to someone. You may find once you start opening up, the tears will flow. A good cry will do you the world of good. If you keep bottling things up, it may lead to health issues. Good luck!

Answer 8

You may still be in a state of shock over what happened. You should go to counseling and talk through this with a professional who can help you start to heal. Good luck.

Answer 9

go to a councillor they always get you tpo cry and move on with your life and once you let it out you will feel better so try a councillor best of luck i know how it feels x

Answer 10

Peel an onion