2007-12-21 20:13:40 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
When i answered your other question about how to tell both sets of parents about being pregnant 2 weeks ago i assumed you actually were pregnant.
In that question you sounded quite mature and had everything planned...
Trying to convince someone to have a baby is not right.
You both have to want it....
You being 18 and him being 19 you should be out enjoying life, making a career, travel the world.
Its one thing falling pregnant and making the most of it. Its totally another planning it.... ESPECIALLY if he doesnt want a baby.
Concentrate your efforts on your career/education for now... In the future he may propose then you can focus on organising a wedding.
THEN plan for the babies and a family. And then you can be the best mum in the world. A mum for you kids to be proud of. With no regrets...
I dont mean to nag or talk down to you. I just think you should re think. You're on here asking for opinions and this is mine.
You're 18....I'm 26 years old, and believe me.... I enjoyed those extra 8 years of lie ins, partys, hangovers and holidays!
Get back on birth control.... or the depo shot if your not good at taking the pill everyday. (i'm wasnt)
I dont want you to miss out... Theres plenty of time for babies... Make sure you got some great stories to tell them when they get here!
2007-12-23 09:47:37 · answer #1 · answered by Just me 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't want one I take it... Well let me tell you from what I'm going through at the moment, wait for the right man who also wants what you want. My ex said yes to please me and now he's hardly in my babies life. If it's just that he's not ready yet and he's worth waiting for than wait. Babies are a huge life changing event and you both need to be at a point where you are "ready." However nothing will ever truly prepare you for the event. I has been the best experience for me so far though.... Also you can't compromise on a baby, either you get one or you don't, it's how you handle it after he/she comes into the world.
2007-12-21 20:25:30 · answer #2 · answered by jes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, don't pressure him or expect him to change his mind overnight. If you keep at it he will get more and more drawn away from the idea and feel he is being given like an ultimatum. Babysit someones baby sometime and let him get used to babies. Maybe he wants to be married first. Really, you should talk to him and be open minded and understanding. Don't try to argue no matter how bad you want to. Find out why, and then you can fix it easier.
2007-12-21 20:20:03 · answer #3 · answered by Hayley C 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You do not do that. If a man doesnt want a baby and he is your boyfriend, you do not pressure him to have a child.
If you plan on getting married then you do discuss your goals for future children. but you do not pressure a man into having a child unless you two are also building a future together in that case you discuss, not convince. Some people do not want children and that is OK ... then you simply choose to part ways. You can talk about why YOU want children but you can not convince someone to want them also.
2007-12-21 20:17:01 · answer #4 · answered by FunkyMonkey 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't try to change his mind. True, I don't know the reason why he's saying no, but he's your boyfriend, not your DH. He has a right to not want a baby out of wedlock -- or for any reason! Too many people who aren't sure about their desires for a baby bring babies into the world and a chain of problems ensues. Lay off the subject or get another man who does want a baby.
2007-12-21 20:18:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you want to have a child and you feel it is the right time for you to have one then sit him down and explain that to him. Explain how you feel about the whole idea and how you're prepared to take on the responsibilites of raising one, explain that you want him to be a part of that as well. Just remember you don't HAVE to be married, there are many people out there that are happy families that are not married. Just keep that in mind.
2007-12-21 20:20:24 · answer #6 · answered by leoangeldust 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Having a baby is a pretty important thing. Perhaps he doesn't feel ready for fatherhood at this point. Don't try to persuade him. He's already thinking about it since it's clear that you've mentioned it to him. There's no rush about having a baby.
2007-12-21 20:23:02 · answer #7 · answered by Richard B 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if he is not wanting a baby then discuss it with him maybe its a fear maybe its financial thing babies cost alot to take care of. maybe its responsability. if he is young then he may not want to settle down right now. men dont think about or plan on having children unless they are older and or ready to have them. give them time and they will come around pressure them and you will drive them away.
2007-12-21 20:21:43 · answer #8 · answered by Danielle 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it wouldent be good to have a baby if you arent married. if there is convincing to do--then you shouldent bother! maybe he wants to wait till you both are married or more financially stable. dont rush him!
2007-12-21 20:16:28 · answer #9 · answered by Bird Girl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he's not ready to be a father, then please don't even try.
Respect what he says - when he's ready, it will be so worth waiting for.
2007-12-21 20:17:39 · answer #10 · answered by Stan W 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋