So I have some friends who are white and I've been friends with them for years since I was like 11( im 18 now) and we always joke around with each other races you know but sometimes when my friends use the n word it bothers me and I don't know what to say without going off on them. I know we've joked for years but Im just sick of it. So how do I explain to them that it bothers me instead of me snapping and making things worse.
2007-12-21 19:29:25 · 18 answers · asked by 78%sarcastic♥ 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
that word is insulting regardless who use it and you have every right to feel that way, honestly maybe you do need to be the one to tell them off because if you don't and they say it around someone else who doesnt it let it go by chances are they might get they're butts kicked.....seriously
2007-12-21 19:33:24 · answer #1 · answered by LeLe ( RIP Bernie Mac) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before it happens again, just say to them, "I just wanted to tell you guys something, I've been thinking about this for a while, and didn't want to make a big deal out of it, but it really bothers me when you guys use the N word." They should understand. It doesn't matter that it didn't bother you before, it bothers you now, so let them know. Shouldn't be a big deal.
2007-12-21 19:46:07 · answer #2 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well next time one of them uses it, just say casual like, "Hey guys, I've been meaning to tell you for some time now, but it kinda bothers me if you use that word. I mean, it was funny and all that when we were younger, but I'm finding it a bit offensive now that we are older." Or something like that. You can't go off at them, they don't know it bothers you. But if they are good friends, they'll stop. They'll probably still slip up now and then, but they'll make an effort. Good luck with it.
2007-12-21 19:36:33 · answer #3 · answered by Andrea H 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What I would do is tell your friends that , you love and cherrish your friendship. And that you care for them . talk to them as nice as you can and say could you use a diffrent word. Try you best to overcome your fear. At the time your frinds might take it as snapping but eventually it will all work out. And if your friends love and respect you they will probably make the right choice.
2007-12-21 19:35:51 · answer #4 · answered by Nataani T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are your friends. Just tell them the "N" word bothers you. If they watch any type of news programs, they will see the affect using the "N" word has had on even famous people. You may see older movies that depict slaves, and use offensive language. Even though the movies are excellent in their depiction, I cry.
The same applies to women. We are called "b....", "wh...", "c...", sl..". Please remember that in your relationships with women.
How can anyone slander a person, any person, to this extent?
Stand your ground.
2007-12-21 20:04:31 · answer #5 · answered by Chloe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, number one, don't wait until they say it again. Confront them right now when you're not going to snap. Just tell them what you've said here. That you don't like it, it bothers you, and you don't want them doing it around you anymore.
2007-12-21 19:33:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should have never let it get that far. It never bothered you before, & suddenly now it does?
I guess that is a typical trait of a woman-she can change her mind about things as she so chooses.
I would just come out & tell them that it bothers you. I guess you'll know how they'll react when they do!
Good luck with that.
2007-12-21 19:33:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
what you need to do is go from happy to serious and make sure you get your point across, tell them that it's ok that they say the other things, but you are truly offended by them saying that, and don't be afraid to do it, if they are saying it they need to know that it's not ok, and they could get into a lot of trouble saying it to the wrong person, or if the wrong person overhears it they might get the wrong idea
2007-12-21 19:34:28 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a great question but you may not like the answer.
You can't change these people. They're set in their ways, and you aren't going to alter their backgrounds or how they got their attitudes.
If you don't like the crowd, get a better crowd. Sorry...that's life.
2007-12-21 19:38:01 · answer #9 · answered by V2K1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell them that youre sick of them saying the n word and that there are a million other words that they could use in place of that. just try to stay calm about it
2007-12-21 19:33:01 · answer #10 · answered by sweey42 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋