I dont want to get people down so if your deeply in love an happier than ever, it might not be the best time to read this.
Ive been doin psychology for two years at school and having done a little bit of study on love and relationships its started to occur to me that love isnt as real as we make it.
If you think about it, love is jjust a an evolutionary solution to finding a good mate and making sure we go all the way and carry on our genes. When we find someone suitable our mind might release hormones and make positive associations with the person so that we spend more time with them and potentially reproduce. Or just so that we stay around the person we feel safest with so that we dont get hurt. again a survival factor.
So are we just victims of our evolved unconcious minds that are quite successfully ensuring the continuation of the human race?
Are we in love? or is it just a method of survival?
Quite a sad way to look at it, but it doesnt mean we cant enjoy it.
2007-12-21 12:33:31 · 8 answers · asked by Laurence F 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Can children fall in love? im sure they can love but can they fall in love? Do we develop a preference to fall in love as we grow up and learn more instincts of what to avoid and what to stay close to. i.e. people we are safe with.
2007-12-21 12:34:49 · update #1
But it would explain unconditional love from parents too. As a way of nature ensuring parents take care of their children. And i suppose we might not have as strong love for friends as we do for family, but that may be due to the idea that we are safe with them but not as safe as we are with family. We may be safe with friends but theres still an element of risk.
Of course yeh, doesnt mean we cant enjoy it, i totally agree. But now that i think of that, it reminds me of a quote from the matrix, when that guy wants to be put back in he says "ignorance is bliss".
2007-12-22 01:32:48 · update #2
lol i think a few people think im going through some sort of crisis, haha.
im not. i was just thinking. thats all it is.
As i said theres no reason why we cant enjoy it.
2007-12-22 06:53:16 · update #3
Yes, it is a chemical reaction designed to ensure the survival of the species.
But like anything else that hurts none, and makes you feel good, enjoy the sh*t out of it while you can.
Being able to express it mathmatically does not make it any less wonderful, or mutually pleasurable.
Awesome question.
2007-12-21 13:10:14 · answer #1 · answered by BillyTheKid 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you are forgetting that loving someone and being in love are two very different emotions! being in love is as you say connected to hormonal urges and natures way of ensuring the continuation of any animal species!
Love itself is a very different emotion which has many different levels. A love for a parent is usually a deeper emotion than the love for a friend!
A child loves others unconditionally and without fear when very young, and children are in love with the world, but to survive a child has to learn that not all will return that love! It's a sad fact of life that survival depends not only on the love but on fear!
When mature we reserve our love for those closest to us, on those we know won't hurt us!
All our emotions are 'real' or we wouldn't feel them! whatever triggers the emotion whether just a chemical released in the brain to respond to some 'animal instinct' for survival or not doesn't matter. If it's how life works we can't change it!
So stop worrying about the how and enjoy the good things life gives you!
2007-12-21 21:19:43 · answer #2 · answered by willowGSD 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love is our needs met. Beauty is that which alights our world, Truth is the light that sets us free.
I think we all, at some juncture and stage of our lives, go through a period of discomforting insecurity whereby we question the actuality of Love, God, truth, the Meaning of Life....
You will come through this stage. Yes love is a chemical reaction. We are programmed and indoctrinated to se love as the opposite gender, flowers and kisses, etc, and yet love, a kiss tendered by th eone we adore upon our athirsted brow, brings a soothing peace that remains with us thereafter.
True love is knowing how to evoke, inspire, find love wherever you may choose to...it is within you, you murder it with denial despondancy, disbelief, and you nurture it with understanding, empathy, self realisation.
Love is a passion, a warmth, a bliss, It also has ties with deceit treachery betrayal. Such is the game of Love. The charade of life. the mystery of the Almighty....
2007-12-22 09:48:20 · answer #3 · answered by VAndors Excelsior™ (Jeeti Johal Bhuller)™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Interesting point of view... but does it explain DINKs (Dual Income No Kids)?
Taking it a step back, it could be more about carrying on a legacy, leaving something behind for future generations. Whether it be in the form of children or in some way of making society better.
I know some DINKs who don't have a care about leaving a legacy behind.
What about couples who adopt?
etc...
2007-12-21 20:51:14 · answer #4 · answered by icing_in_ak 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. That is a really interesting way to look at it. It makes sense too...
However, about the children, they can love with such innocence and completely unconditionally so perhaps not all of love is a survival factor.
Interesting. Very interesting!
:)
2007-12-21 20:39:39 · answer #5 · answered by Amanda// 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you're totally right.That's why you should find the perfect one and suicide with him/her before it all fades away...
2007-12-23 15:41:34 · answer #6 · answered by EternalLilith 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i look at love as nothing more than a chemical reaction.
but i like your view as well.
2007-12-21 20:42:23 · answer #7 · answered by zero 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How boring, what a load of crap.
2007-12-22 09:56:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋