Hi im a 16 yr old girl and my bf is 15 (yes i know haha)
We've been going out a two months and havent had sex with each other yet, though we are not virgins.
I really want to spend the night with him, but not to have sex :)
And then maybe after a few nights together we might have sex, if we feel ready. I was wondering peoples experiences regarding how they went about doing things like this and how parents reacted or if they let them. My parents can be quite strict, they think i am still a virgin, and i dont know how they'd react if i asked them if i could sleepover. Any parents out there wirth opinions on this? I dont want to disrespect my parents or lie to them etc.
2007-12-21 11:33:05 · 19 answers · asked by pogzemily 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
you sound very mature for your age and you seem very responsible, your parents should trust you more.
i started having sex at 15 (almost 16) i was in a trusting relationship and i had been with him about 3months. my mum guessed that we were having sex and she went over contraception etc with me. i was already on the pill because of irregular periods since i was 14 - my mum suggested it and i think it was mostly just incase i decided to start having sex but she never told me that at the time lol anyway my mum told me about using condoms etc even though i was on the pill (verry important for sti's) and she let me stay at his house overnight but my dad didnt like it and thought i was a virgin for a long time before my mum told him i wasnt and by then it was too late and he was surprisingly calm about it.
if my daughter (im pregnant with a girl) told me at 16 that she wanted to stay overnight with her boyfriend id sit her down and go over sex ed and condoms etc breifly (i would have had the sex talk with her way before she was 16) make sure she was safe and protected and let her go about it. i know that if i told her no straight out and forbid her from having sex that she'd defy me and go do it anyway and she wouldnt be as likely to have safe sex and end up doing it behind my back wich is alot worse.
try talking to your parents, explain you are responsible, you arent planning on having sex and if you did you would do it safely. if they have any sense they will know that if they say no you will do it anyway. you never know they might surprise you like my dad did i thought he'd go mental when my mum told him but he just said "is she? you using condoms sarah? thats fine then" and that was it lol
good luck and merry xmas x
2007-12-21 12:01:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
At 15 he is too young to be having sex by law. You are only 16, you are still so young, why are you thinking of things like that. You should be going out and enjoying whats left of your childhood while you can and not getting tied up in these adult things. What if you did it and you got pregnant, accidents can happen you know, could you handle that? It is really not worth it, wait until you are both old enough to enjoy it without the worries, you will find a stress free sex life a hell of a lot more enjoyable then a secret one you have to hide from your parents.
2016-05-25 08:44:21 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, 16 and your not a virgin? That sucks, I'm sorry. My husband and I were both virgins when we married, and it made everything about our wedding night, and our whole marriage and sex life so amazing. I was 19, and he was 21. If only you would have waited a couple more years. I was with my husband (boyfriend at the time) for 6 years before we married and had sex. 6 YEARS, not 2 MONTHS... Wait until you know he's the right guy, wait until you know if you wer eto get pregnant, you can both care for the baby, wait until you know neither of you have any STD's, protection doesn't always protect from pregnancy.
You are already lying to your parents if they think your a virgin and your not, deceiving them is the same as lying to them.
I have to disagree with what a previous statement said, you don't sound responsible for your age if you are considering having sex with someone after only dating a couple months.
Good luck with your life, sounds like your making a lot of mistakes already, hopefully you will figure things out before any of them are too serious.
Toni Lynne
2007-12-21 12:41:23 · answer #3 · answered by tonilynne 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Start practicing your "I'm pregnant" speech, cuz that's where you're headed.
Honestly, you won't be ready for the consequences of sex for a few more years yet. You haven't learned from the other times, yet. But when your list gets longer, you'll start realizing you behaved pretty sluttily.
I'd say your parents need to chaperone all of your dates.
Remember, ALL birth control has a failure rate. Just look at the post of the gal that said you are mature. She used birth control and she's pregnant.
2007-12-21 16:35:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
"I dont want to disrespect my parents or lie to them etc."
you already have.
--
[And to everyone else who told her to stay a virgin]
READ THE FUXKING QUESTIONS
---
I have the kind of mum who lets me do stuff at home, so that I don't sneak behind her back.
she bought me a bottle of 37% alcohol, it's in the kitchen for whenever I want a drink.. ..last night she gave my 12 year old sister a 5% bottle of vodka.
If I 'asked' her if it was alright, she'd probably 'say yes,' - provided it's either 'in this house' or that I use protection. *lol*
I mean she's a very over-protective parent, I guess she thinks I'm responsible enough to make the right decisions on my own, and I like to think that I am.
..and that's how you go about parenting if you don't want your kids to lie and go behind your back...
2007-12-21 18:39:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is supposed to be your time to be free and having sex (even though you are not a virgin) can lead to many responsibilities that you and your boyfriend may not be ready for. I have heard it all from we use protection to he knows when to pull out. Wait get yourself a real life where you can become successful sex is only good for making babies and getting diseases. You are too young for either.
2007-12-21 11:48:13 · answer #6 · answered by Emily Q 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Love is more important than Sex. Sex is just like a number on a Score card for some people.
2007-12-21 22:59:38 · answer #7 · answered by The Questioner 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A teenage boy-girl sleepover, especially boyfriend girlfriend sleepover, absolutely would NOT fly in my house.
And...you say don't want to lie to your parents? Honey - you're lying to them already if they still think you're a virgin.
2007-12-21 12:20:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're right, you don't want to lie because then they won't trust you in the future. I'm married and almost 30 but even when I was 21 my mom wouldn't let me sleep over anywhere with my boyfriend (who is now my husband) because she didn't want to promote and condone sex. I have a daughter now and when she's older I plan on telling her the same thing.
2007-12-21 11:41:02 · answer #9 · answered by Precious 7 · 4⤊ 2⤋
I'm sorry but it would be a no from me. I wouldn't like it at all. With my own parents, I found it best to keep them in the dark about my activities so that they wouldn't worry. However, as long as you are safe, using contraception and realise he isn't legal yet and you could get into trouble, then its really up to you how you approach this.
2007-12-21 11:39:07 · answer #10 · answered by AUNTY EM 6 · 4⤊ 3⤋