2007-12-21 08:39:17 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Didn't say I was looking to swing.
2007-12-21 08:54:54 · update #1
He asked me to come and have a look at the website he was on. What did I think about that? I was intrigued, but it took me a long time to fully understand why he would want me to have sex with other people. I thought it was because he didn't love, value or respect me, and that he was a pervert who wanted to get his jollies passing me around to strangers to be used and abused while he got his rocks off on my humiliation. Turns out it wasn't like that at all. He wasn't asking something of me; he was offering me a gift. This was him getting off on me reveling in my fully-liberated sexuality. He just wanted to see me turned on and fulfilled, and being a realist, he understood that it just isn't reasonable for him to expect me (or anyone for that matter) to pretend that he was the only man in the world who could trip my trigger. It doesn't take anything away from him to admit that. He's still AWESOME in the sack. It just means he isn't threatened by other men being good at giving pleasure as well.
This was about 8 years ago now. Today we have an amazing relationship that I wouldn't trade for anything...and we embrace responsible non-monogamy. My advice would be to be VERY patient, don't push, and approach her very carefully. You'll need to understand that she's probably going to read a lot into your question. Try to anticipate some of the nightmares that will go through her mind, because she'll likely have some: Am I not good enough? Not pretty enough? Not thin enough? Is he bored? Does he feel trapped? Is he secretly having an affair already? Let yourself see things from her point of view. This is going to come at her from out of left field and hit her like a freight train. You'd better be prepared to support her as she sorts through all this.
Try the website below. See the FAQ and the New Swingers forum there for great advice and info. Best site on the web for swingers!
2007-12-21 09:20:14 · answer #1 · answered by intuition897 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
She brought up the idea of a 3-way with her friend on new years's a few years ago. Although we never did anything with the friend, it got us talking. Another gal she was doing daycare for noticed an abrupt shift in my equilibrium & figured out what was going on. Little did I know, this other gal has been into things that would make Jenna Jameson blush. Anyway, she kind of "coached" us, making sure we had all questions answered & bases covered before her & her husband were our first experience.
FWIW, looking back, we were standing at the door for years,. We just needed a hand to walk us through. We'd joked for years about the idea, fantasized about things in bed, etc. Even before we took the plunge, she felt comfortable telling me when she thought someone was hot & would often point out other women with......"features" she knows I like.
2007-12-22 01:03:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This question always is good for a laugh.
He always thinks shes up for another woman, she might accept a man as a third party more readily.
He, of course, knows this isn't what he had in mind.
Why would you think that she not only wants another woman, but wants you to have one too?
Unless you are talking couples swinging, but I think you would have already tuned into that if she was interested.
One side note...what do you do if she decides the new guy is better than you are?
2007-12-21 08:56:47 · answer #3 · answered by justa 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Make love to her tonight and start opening your conversatiopn discussing the threesome, wife swapping and or swinging as way to enhances your sexual experiences for both of you. When noticing she is approaching on her ultimate orgasm, try top open your question if she likes to try another variety of guy or want ot swing as you want too?
Before you asked her question before she reached orgasm to give you the best reply of yesssssssssssssss....
2007-12-21 17:13:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I told my wife it would really turn me on to see her have sex with another man. When she asked why, I told her it was probably from looking at porn and having that be the major influence in my early "self gratification." Normally, I would look at pictures or movies with men having sex with women, and it seemed natural watching it from a "third party," perspective. When she said she would do it, we came up with a set of rules, that we had to follow. As the time has gone on it has become very erotic. It's not like we are out prowling for men every night, but a couple of times a year, it is fun. Good luck to you.
2007-12-21 08:48:02 · answer #5 · answered by xp2c 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It started with us discussing fantasies. What she wanted to do that we hadn't and what I wanted to do that we hadn't. Over the course of several months we decided that swinging was not for us and have not tried it.
You have to be open to the outcome. If you discuss it and she/he is not into it you have to be willing to let it go or it could destroy your relationship.
2007-12-24 05:41:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Jake, it happened by accident. It all started when a bought my kids a swing set. One day when I was in the kitchen, I discovered my wife sitting on the swing. I walked out and asked her if she would like a swing, so I pushed her. She loves it now....
2007-12-21 08:46:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
You should have thought about that before you got married. You need to sit down and have a talk with your spouse to get to the root of you guy's problems.
2007-12-21 08:46:27 · answer #8 · answered by Riley's Mommy 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
1
2017-03-02 00:35:38 · answer #9 · answered by alana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I got a nice wooden one for the front porch! It's REALLY easy! First, you sit down, then you push off the porch floor with your feet and TA-DA! you're swingin!
Try being happy with the one you have. Swinging causes too many ripples.
2007-12-21 08:44:44 · answer #10 · answered by Jennifer R 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋