I have a hippie friend. Her hippie ways have been fine with me I respect most of them. She recently had a baby and he was sick (18 months old) She is completely clueless. Sounds judgemental because it is. Doesn't like the medical establishment. The child started vomitting while I was over there. He has been sick for weeks with a mucous bad cold. No decongestant, no vicks, no humidifier, it has to be 'natural'. Plus all she feeds him is breast milk, with all that mucous. And what is worse is that she is so arrogant that she won't take any help for anyone. I pressured her and we took the baby to the clinic and the doctor said he was fine but I told her to tell him about his bright yellow mucous which he was throwing up. I said that could be a bacterial infection. She said "what does that mean?" Anyway she says he is slowly getting better. I think that is the most selfish thing in the world. Would you try and work on the friendship? I want to tell her to get it together!
2007-12-21 05:00:32 · 4 answers · asked by daisyduck4007 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I know that she is the mother but I think that the facts speak for themselves. It is hard to see a child who is dependent on his mother for care not be given simple things to ease his congestion. But maybe I do think my way is best would love to hear what people think. If I am being too controlling about a kid that isn't mine then fine but I don't think so.
2007-12-21 05:07:59 · update #1
she does feed him well and he is bathed with clean clothes and such. She is good with him and loves him but it just made me crazy. I haven't talked with her but it may be fine. She said she would take him to the doctor as a last resort. So I suppose that is if he wasn't responding to treatment. I think i emailed her about the vicks and decongestant so maybe she has looked into that I hope. I believe this scared her and she felt overwhelmed. The child isn't neglected in other ways
2007-12-21 05:16:17 · update #2
Well, I think you are great for worrying about the welfare of the child. However, is the child really being neglected in all ways? In that, you have cause for concern. Is he malnourished, dirty clothes, unbathed?
Also, my wife and I do not necessarily rush our 15 month old to the doctor for every thing, either. The medical establishment does not know everything. However, in this child's case it does sound alarming..she should at least by supplementing his fluid intake, administering vitamins and possibly echinacea, and using a humidifier to ease his breathing.
We are all-natural, but that doesn't mean we are stupid. We would never abandon our son to an illness without trying to alleviate discomfort. And for sure, if his illness seemed worse, and not responding to home-treatment, I would certainly take him in to the doc.
As a friend, you need to respect her opinions on childcare. HOWEVER, if you really feel worried for the child, PLEASE keep bringing it up. Research natural options and try and get involved that way.
And if the child is really neglected, it may be time to step in and ask Child Welfare Authorities to have a look..although you might lose her as a friend, but this is for the child, not her.
Good Luck!
2007-12-21 05:09:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
An anonymous tip to the children and family division of the local deprtment of social services (whatever these agencies are called in your state) will get a caseworker into the picture, and your friend will have to do what's best for her child's health. The downside is that she's likely to figure out that you sent the tip, and you may lose your friend.
Another possiblity is the baby's grandmother, preferably the maternal one, because she'll probably feel freer to intervene. If she just comes for a visit, sees the situation, and informs her daughter, "If you don't get medical treatment for that baby, I'm going to call Social Services," you won't have to be the "villain."
2007-12-21 05:10:54 · answer #2 · answered by aida 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you maintain the friendship, at least you know somebody is watching out for the child.
If you truly believe the child is being neglected, you need to call child welfare. If this is just about you thinking your way is better, you need to back off and let your friend parent her own way.
2007-12-21 05:05:40 · answer #3 · answered by notmuchofacook 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is according to the level of your relationship with the mother. If you can coax her to provide appropriate medical care, this will be good. If not, the child is the most important person here. I know that you will do the right thing. I wish you well. What shall we then say to these things? If GOD be for us, WHO can be against us? - Romans 8:31. The Lord daily loadeth us with BENEFITS, even the GOD of our salvation. Selah. - Psalm 68:19. Peace, Love and God Bless.
2007-12-21 05:49:50 · answer #4 · answered by In God We Trust 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋