I'm still trying, but you would in my position.
What would you have changed in your life to avoid the ups and downs?
2007-12-21 04:43:39 · 9 answers · asked by MikeD2 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Your past is what made who you are today.
Take the bad things and figure out what you can do to help those who have similar bad things happen to them.
Take the good things and build your your self esteem on these.
Take time to thank people that may have had a hand in that,
and the bad things... by lending an ear or a helping hand up will only add to your self esteem.
also you may already know this... but to those that might not...
Forgiving people that have hurt you in the past( and we all have someone)is not the same as saying it was OK that they did, and they know who they are ...and they can work thru that crap on their own or at the Pearly Gates..
Its just saying I refuse to let what you did DEFINE ME in any way. because I am not giving over any satisfaction to you at all.
helping someone else will help you heal.
Forgiving someone else will help you mature.
2007-12-21 05:21:02 · answer #1 · answered by to tell ya the truth........... 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not totally!
What I find is that some things get pushed to the furthest recesses of my mind when other more important ones are operating in my life. Some I don't remember but a person from the past or a similar event in someone else's life may trigger a memory.
Change what? Perhaps different choices, be bolder and more open.
2007-12-21 13:21:26 · answer #2 · answered by SANCHA 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could erase one memory. It's the only I haven't confessed to anyone. Other things I have confessed to a trusted friend have ceased to give me the chills like they use to. It sure feels better to have someone help carry the secrets for you. You gotta trust them, and once you do it you can't beat yourself up over whether or not they will keep it a secret.
Nothing is worse then thinking about living the rest of you7r lifr not knowing when a flashback will hit you and take you down for the day, week, or month. It will mess with your job, your relationships, and your sanity. I haven't forgotten the stuff I told my friennd about but it helped me cope and I have flashbacks less often.
2007-12-21 13:15:35 · answer #3 · answered by ira d 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people seem to forget almost everything! A good memory can be a mixed blessing, because it keeps old hurts and embarrassments (and worse) alive. As the first responder said, "trying not to think about it" (Lucy's five-cent answer) usually backfires, but if you have something ELSE to think about (like something new you're trying to learn), you can get into the habit of immediately substituting it for the bad memories when they surface. They'll still be buried somewhere in your mind, but you can keep them from bothering you so much.
If you're of this persuasion, try praying the Jesus Prayer whenever they pop up: "Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on us." It covers anything you did that you wish you hadn't and anything someone else did to you that you're having trouble forgetting or forgiving.
2007-12-21 13:02:21 · answer #4 · answered by aida 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No you cant forget.. really nothing I could of done to avoid any of the ups and downs.. OUr life is mapped out for us when we are born.. so you really cant change a thing. We might try but it will always be the end results.
2007-12-21 14:23:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can forget the past. You can move on though. I wouldn't want to have avoided my ups and downs because they are what define me as a person. If everything in life is smooth and easy, you don't grow as a person.
2007-12-21 13:04:44 · answer #6 · answered by Leaf 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only thing that'll happen is that the memory won't be recalled into the present as often. It will always be there.
Oh, and trying not to think about it works in reverse. Just make new memories by doing new things and that will overwhelm the past remembrances.
C. :)!!
2007-12-21 12:49:34 · answer #7 · answered by Charlie Kicksass 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it." -- Confucius. I know it's difficult, but realize what you needed to learn from the incident, there's something there. Then forgive yourself for what happened (and if possible, the person who wronged you, but do keep your boundaries with this person). Go out and find good friends and it will be easier to forget the incident and person who wronged you. You will learn and grow a lot not only by going through the bad times but good times as well!
2007-12-21 15:45:27 · answer #8 · answered by Lilikoi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No for what it's worth you want,but at least you can learn from the it and go ahead and go to differnet things now,really nothing for that comes with the terriority of any life good or bad.
2007-12-21 12:53:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋